Chayei Sarah | Land & Marriage | Rabbi Ari Kahn | November 13th 2025

So this year as all the sh this year are sponsored by Rabbi Michael and Jerry Lax meter for the foolish lame of their granddaughter of Surah Bach Aarona she should have fooshar Israel they also wrote on the bottom of the page in small letters that it's uh in me in in loving memory of my mother Rifka mayor and mind so I will say this week's paris where Rifka comes onto the scene So, uh, so, uh, I guess as long as we're in the scholarly there's going to be a, you know, some element of, uh, of my mother sneaking into this. But we're we're going to start we'll start from the beginning and we're going to ultimately come to something which I think inevitably we get to whenever we talk about kaisara and that is that there are lots and lots and lots of words there. There and and there are lots of words in a place that they could have been very few words and I actually started a different share this week in the exact same way in the exact same place. Although this one I'm going to go in a different direction but I just you know observed that if you look at the first okay there's two elements there's perkovgiml and perkuftal in kovgiml you have the death and burial of sara and then in kuftalid you have the courtship it's not as romantic as it could be I mean when you send someone else you have the courtship and then the marriage of Rifka so if I were to use the marriage of Abraham and Sarah to contrast they don't even get a whole possib they get half a puk. It's shared together with some with someone else. And then if you compare it to right afterwards, you have the death of of soak dies. It didn't even say, you know, you don't have the long negotiations and where he's buried. It does say he he died in Karan. But over here, you have an outlier in terms of both parts and that is just this all of this information. And then on top of all the information, then you have the repetition of information. So that's part of the problem. But let's go back to the beginning. So these are the years of Sarah's life. This formula is used by a number of people, but for some reason this rash is more famous than some of the others and that's for a very simple reason and that is that the the beginning of the para always gets more attention than other points of the para. Aram's death is described the same way and I believe there are others butan so there's a lot of discussion about that why she dies in this particular place after the aa which is I guess is part of the problem part of the question how closely is this aligned with the aada and you have lots of midrashi sites that connects them after a goes back to besva and then you have a nice long ramban there which is all about location and We discussed that Ramban at some point in the past also and one of the things he says and don't tell me that Arams lived in different cities. He did not like that suggestion and then it continues and it says vyavo abraham that becomes the question where is he coming from but as I said if you try to midrashically connect it to the aada then you actually raise all kinds of questions but of course there's another element and that is that despite those who claim that ye was 37 and rifka at that moment was three we do not know Rifka's age we do not know how old Rifka was compared there to Yeitzk there is no source to tell us how old she was we know how old he was when they got married. He was 40. But there is this again this nice midrashic concept that Rifka was born after the aada. So therefore, if she's born after and he gets married at 40, then she must have been three. Now I'll just point out not only is Rifka's birth mentioned there, but so was her parent, so was a previous generation. So you want to say they were also born right then after the Aada. I mean, it seems really quite selective to point that out. in in in my mind there's another reason to frame Rifka's age at three and that is most likely and I'm getting ahead of myself now but that's most likely in order to create something which is much more thematic and that is that we know that Araham recognizes God at the age of three and therefore to make her as somebody who is very Arahamike I think is much more of the explanation rather than getting into other kinds of questions. I mean also in the the whole texture of chapter 24 when the avid comes and she goes running and she's called an a is not somebody who's three who's somebody who's older. So I'm just saying I think that the textual evidence points to an older age. there are already balot who have some kind of tradition that she's 14 but I'm going to say it again in terms of kish itself there is absolutely no evidence unless you'll say that now that itself is evidence but we have no idea how old she was to um but what we do know is that they were married for 20 years before they had children cuz we're told is 60 when the children are born and is 40 when they get married but her age, I'll say it again, is not there, but yet every kid who went to yeshiva knows that she was three year old three years old at that point. And as I said, it's funny what we know and uh or why we think we know what we know. So just leaving that for a moment. I want to get to something which is much stronger and much more important in terms of our discussion today and that is moving from Gimmel to but first again we'll just make sure we understood the end of and there are those including Rabbi Salvetric who have questioned the sequence of first eulogizing and then crying what's public what's private and he has discussed this at length but Alto Abraham then has to uh deal with some technical issues and he speaks to the now just first of all who are b come from or so the answer is either you know or you don't know and the only way that you'll know is if you read the really boring parts of uh of the where after the flood there's a whole laundry list of names and then you will have found out that is in fact one of the children of Kanan which means that whatever you're going to say about the Canaanites and their rights to the land they're living in the land at that point the the the are people who ultimately are from ultimately and these are the people who will be dispossessed of their land moving forward. So what we're told then is that Aram approaches them or maybe remember some vers and he says as follows. So G has a connotation of strangeness an alien vto is a resident. So an alien resident almost by the way is a contradiction in terms but apparently what he's saying is that I live here amongst you. I live here with you but I'm not with you. That there is that there is nonetheless a difference. And that is going to be important again not just for chapter 23 but also for 24. Peric gimmel and kftalid are going to be expressions of this. Now we have some other information but let's just hold on to the other information for a moment. again he's with them but he's differenti so the first suggestion here is which sounds like give to me give to me we don't know yet about any financial arrangements but he's saying you know I live with you and I need social services and one of the things that you need as a as a resident here is that you need a place to bury your dead and he goes this is what I And then of course they're going to say and take among our best from our best plots in our best cemeteries which means Afra has expressed that he's different. He's a gtov and they're expressing that no you are you're amongst us. So then of course right go take from our best plots but so and then we'll continue and will finally say again earlier but over here he'll say very clearly I want this particular place. Now again, if I had to guess, I were and I know there are traditions that Adam and Eve are buried there. But if I had to guess, they're offering to be buried amongst them. And Aram is saying that no, I'm not amongst you. I just live amongst you because I'm a gervos. And Aram is stressing the difference while they're actually expressing the opposite and the acceptance. On the other hand, they also called him and I want to come back to that point. They call him the this. Well, it's not just elohim and not just so the Ezra and that's in source number two. He frames the elohim again focusing on the on the part because you could say that you are a leader. You're or you're and I guess I'm really you a little bit wondering about the difference between Nasi versus Melik. Maybe we never imagined a know maybe we don't have any reason to imagine that a is their leader. But hold on a second. Izzarra takes it and says soim is another way of saying that you're a godly man. We know that God is with you. Which is really interesting because these people are pagans. So the pag but but but pagans don't have exclusivity. They're willing to accept all kinds of gods and therefore they see and they >> Could you say that again? They see and they know that Abraham is a man of God. And this man of God aspect of Avam seems to be this overwhelming charisma and this overwhelming success. And therefore they apparently want to be a part of this success and they say that no you are going to a prophet of God who is with us. The Rashban takes it as which means that they are precisely responding back to that point where Aram says that I am a stranger amongst you and they're saying no you are and I'll say it again the continuation of what they say strengthens the Rashbam's point because they're saying no to bury over here you don't have to buy you're one of us you you are a part of our people so it's interesting that a is saying I am not a part of your people and I want to pay and I want to pay cash and they're saying that no you don't have to there's actually two midrashim which say the same thing and the two midrashim are focused on two different places but one will shed light on the other and help us understand what's going on and they also will take us to what I think is a much larger point and and really what it comes down to uh even though Gil's not here this week so I'll have to take care of the Zionist propaganda by myself and that is one of the things that we know is that the purchase of the Marah is an acquis acquis acquisition that Abraham makes in the land of Israel. On the other hand, we all know that all of the anti-sionists, which is very popular today, will still call us colonialists and it won't make a difference. There's a purpose, there's a purchase, there's not a purchase. But it's interesting that Abraham is first invited. You're a part of us. But there may be something very cynical about that. So I the cynicism you're going to have to wait for a moment but I would ask you to think about a different point and that is what claims does Aram actually have to the land of Israel and the answer is that there's three separate claims and maybe a fourth the fourth is connected it's it's an extension of one of them the mo the most basic claim is going to be that God promised to him so again that's also the kind of thing that I don't think any argument on Twitter has ever ended by saying yeah but God promised it to us. So somehow a whole bunch of people who believe in the Bible don't believe in the Bible when it comes to that particular point. It's easy for Christians because they're the real Jews anyway. So therefore uh there and and Rome is Jerusalem. So therefore like what are we talking about, right? They get to this uh level of identity theft to a whole new cosmic level. But the first thing is that God promises. If you want to extend that then you have a arriving and again the although does not contain a statement of land. It's once he you'll go to the land I'll show you but it doesn't talk about ownership of land. So once he gets to the land then he's told about ownership of the land because he listened to the and then he's told to traverse the land you know you'll go and you'll walk in this land and so on and so forth so I'll say the the surveying of the land itself is an indication of ownership also to walk up and down the land to walk up and down the streets to walk through the country to walk through the fields all of that is an indication of believing in the divine promise and actualizing what God has promised by again self-actualization by being here which means if Aam wouldn't have come and A would have stayed by you know behind and then he could have told his grandchildren no I mean God once promised me some land but you never went and you never walked in that land and therefore your claims to that land become limited but then there were okay I'm going to skip the other one but we have over here as well that Aram purchases land but there's Something else that I skipped. Let's take a look at source number four. This is in the midrasha. By the way, don't get fooled when it says par Noak. It's not Noah. It's parv. Okay, that's just where it is. It's in par, right? Somebody who's strange, but he lives there. So, he's the mar. So, like you you decide which one it is. which is interesting. This is in the context of a looking for a place to bury Sara and he's saying to them, "Oh, by the way, I have divine rights. I actually have ownership of this land." So, we did not see that here, but it's saying that that is like a somewhat between the lines. There is another element that at which point does that ownership kick in? Which means God promises, but when does that happen? Meaning that's the other point that I didn't say yet. And I could say, well, it kicks in when Yitzk is born. I can say it kicks in with Yitzk with Yitzk's descendants. So, let's leave that for a moment. But aam says in the midrash, this is all my land. Although is this is this a future's stake in this enterprise or is it current? became so I'm just asking for one place right now and now we get to this you are again the words in the itself the counter that he's aviu So that's interesting. He he is they're saying you're a king, you're a leader, you're a god because the line has always been a very uh narrow line when it comes to pagans. He says the world is not lacking a king. You know, he's saying calm yourselves down and the world is not lacking a god. So again, a educating the masses and educating people regarding monotheism and they overestimate Aram's capabilities. Again he says God promised and he says and their response basically is well know look at you look who you are which is overstating what the actually says take the best of our places and they're saying you know to bury a lot now this teaching actually almost an identical midrash goes back to an earlier episode and that was the episode that we skipped and look at source number five. This is the meda in left here is when we had the first world war the four kings against the five kings and as you recall somehow the Jews get involved in all of this right because that's the way that things work and lo gets kidnapped and aim then comes All of again the pagans, all the adversaries came and they chopped down trees and they made a I don't want to translate a a a high No, no, it's not a it's not a it's a platform. So it's fascinating. It takes the phrase that we find over here and it reads it into Ara just after he was victorious militarily. But what happened when Aan was victorious militarily? Because I don't want you to forget about this. >> He captured all the land. He was the one who won the war when there's the four kings against the five kings. Which means that not only does Abraham have rights to this land because God promised it and therefore when God walked when he walks on the land, he also has rights to this land because of a military conquest. So once again, we know that there are peoples of the world who don't care what God say. They don't care about military conquest. They don't care that you walked into the land. They don't care and it's actually much deeper than that. They don't care, and again I'm getting ahead of myself, that there's a love affair with this land. They don't even care that not only do we love the land, but the land loves us. And therefore, the land could have lied. It's good every couple of years, every 3 years, every seven years, and so on. But it lied for 2,000 years until the Jews came back. It's the land comes back to life because the land is in love with the people of Israel as well, which as I said, again, I'm getting ahead of myself with this, but it's not just because God promised it. And not just because that we work the land or AA walks through the land and therefore displays ownership and not just because of a military conquest. There's also the JNF, right? Abraham's fund who bought the land as well. But I'll say it again that all all this falls on deaf ears. And again, go back and look at the that first rashi, right? The very first rash in the Kish. What what does Rashi say that the non-Jews of the world are going to come and they're going to say? list that you're robbers. And what does then Rashi quote? It doesn't say doesn't say tell it to the BBC or the New York Times or the Washington Post or this or CNN. And the list of all of this group goes on and on and on. Naomi, by the way, is interviewed by all of these people. I I asked her why. I think she Time magazine interviewed her last week and uh and if she does well then they then they'll just ignore the article because they'll realize they were wrong more likely than not. They'll either just not quote her or twist something that was said. But none of them none of them are going to accept any of this as uh as significant at all because people have narratives and the narratives are what they want to keep with. But as I said, these two midrashim are fascinating because what are these midrashim doing? They're saying yes, a purchases of this land, but realize then the linkage and it goes in both directions because each midrash goes back and forth. It's saying that over here that you are this king among us, but when did they first say that? They first said that when the war was over. What what are you called when you defeat all the other kings? What are you called then? And therefore, they built for him a platform. And what did they do at that moment? They coronated him. And they coronated Abraham as the king. And therefore, they're saying, "You're a king among us." But there's still something missing. And what is missing is that Abraham doesn't really have a continuation. Yes, at this point he has a son. He has one son who was sent away. And there's another son, Yitzk, but this Yitzk isn't married. This doesn't have children. And therefore, if Aram is powerful, and I I'll say powerful in various ways. He's powerful perhaps militarily, politically, but he's also powerfully spiritually. And I'm willing to even read all of these commentaries together. And he lives amongst you. You want to say you're one of us. And you can also imagine another thing that then follows. The day comes that Abraham passes away. So then what happens to Yitzk? So hopefully Yitz gets married and who does he marry? Well, he has very little choice who he marries. He marries somebody local. So who's somebody local? one of the Benot. So what happens when he marries one of the Benot? So then all of Araham's power and possessions and so on ends up being reabsorbed back into the local commerce and therefore it is absolutely within their interest politically and financially to say aam you're one of us because if a's one of us so by the way do you want a parallel to this? The parallel is what happens with what do they say with >> it's it's really the exact same claim and that's what's taking place over here where says no no we'll marry one another and then we'll take all of their possessions we'll marry and this is easier this is much easier because there aren't as many of them and we'll take away all the possessions and therefore sure you should be buried with us you should be buried in our cemetery because you're one of us and what does Afraim say no I'm not one of you I'm a gtov I am a stranger amongst you. I'm different. I have a divine promise. So, it's interesting. The midash read that into it. I've captured all of this legally, by the way. I'm the one who is the rightful owner of this. Okay. So, we have a couple things that have to take place before that ownership is actualized. But again, what I'm pointing out over here is these little subtle points of language. You may have thought that what they're saying is very is full of reverence and they're saying no we respect you Abraham they do but out of fear and out of greed and Ara is saying I'm not one of you I'm separate let me buy my own separate grave I am not with you I'm separate and if any of this isn't clear it all is going to become clear very very clear when you get to the next chapter because the next chapter is exactly this conversation which takes place. Now I want to pause for a moment and have an introduction to today's >> shar. This reminds me it's like unbelievable that if you live in your shy you're entitled to the cloth >> but if you want your wife with you you got to pay another exact same story. >> Tell them I don't want her next to me. Then they'll do anyone but her. So, so let me now start our introduction. I would divide beret and really for the purpose of this year I would divide beret into three sections pre aote which means the whole beginning and and Adam and Eve if you want and this serpent and uh going all through the pre flood generation the post flood the tower au it's everything pre Araham and by the way all that's to the med says that everything's to Abraham is the beginning of uh of of the world in a in a certain sense we then get the what I would call the avote and that then takes us through from the beginning of Abraham until most likely and you can argue exactly where this happens easily it's perlad beginning of which is really y and the brothers you could have already argued it happens a little bit earlier maybe it happens by already maybe it already happens when we get to maain but it's right there between chapters 35 36 37 it begins but that becomes the the third part of the book and that is the children of Yakov and that takes you to the end of the book Yakov is still there but it's the story is about the children so essentially what I just now did is I divided bation into three parts one part is pre-Araham the other and the other part is the avot and the the last part is the banim so today's analysis is essentially trying to identify, locate, understand the key element of the middle part, which means what is taking place within this middle part? What are the moving parts of this? And or what are the most important elements of this? And and once I I point it out, I think it'll become very obvious and you'll you'll see it staring at you and it's just going to come up again and again, maybe even again. But now, let's understand it. When we move again, we saw those twin midrashim. But when we move now to source number six, which is the next chapter, where we get to this again long chapter, longest chapter, when we get to this, aim is elderly and he's been blessed in every single way. And he turns to this unnamed Evid who everybody knows is Eleazar, just doesn't say it at any point. And it goes out of its way not to say it. You realize it would have been easier just to say, but it avoids that and swear by God. And what does it say? So just in case you didn't realize it taking place right before, he's saying it right over here. I am I'm a gervos. I live in their midst, but I'm absolutely no to marry within the Canaanite people. Absolutely not. Who are the Canaanites? Well, who's Ben is is is the son of Kanan. Who's Kanan? Kanan. Kanan is the son of Kam. Kanan. Actually, you go back again to those parts that you don't pay attention to enough. Kanan was cursed. Kanan when Kam does whatever he does. Kanan is the one that's cursed. Kanan is cursed. Right. And go further now presumably his children are so lives amongst them but he goes I'm not I'm not I'm not with you. I want you to go there and take. Now the key word the key word in both of these sections is goes back to the root of it's to take here. I mean you could look how many times it's used. Maybe she's not going to want to come. Should I bring him back? Now just remember something. Initial prophecy most likely is bringing back to some extent may undo and he has no interest in doing that. No is going to stay over here rather you go right you go but is staying over here what if she doesn't want to come no my son's not going there you notice that word being used again God took me Is referring to 100%. God is the one who took me. So Ara again is being really clear about this. He has this promise. You know, even though it only came out madrashically in in parglim, it's staring at us in the words itself in paracalid. And I'll say it again, Kafgimal and Kufalad are interrelated because they're dealing with two sides of the same problem. And that is that Ara is promised this land. This land is his land. Don't go back there because that land was rejected and was brought over here. And rather needs a wife, but he cannot be a local wife. And he goes over there and you're going to go take a wife from there. And again you notice the word and so on. It will continue various times over here at the end when he repeats it. I highlighted some of them and so on and so forth, right? and so on and so forth again I don't know how many times and then he gives a great deal of money and the marriage takes place and so on and so forth and we will stop here and instead we will move on to source number seven and we're going to be a little fancy here first we're going to say the simple things and then we're going to get fancy the mission in the very beginning of says by the wayn is not terribly romantic and the asks that and and he even says in other places it says is a little bit better than so what is going on with and it says it says it's trying to stress that there needs to be actually some type of a acquisition by the way who's the acquisition from it's from her which means she accepts the ring she accepts the kaducian so it's saying is that we need to stress that this is somehow an acquisition is taking place. Don't worry. Again, I'm going to get more romantic than an acquisition in a moment. And how in the world do we know that it needs to be done by money? Gamar, we learn gamar from the word gamar. Gamar, we learn literally means take take. This is a heckish in two places. It says the same word because it used the word on the one hand it says that's the verse that has to do with marriage. If you need to look at that, it's in source number eight. That's invar but it says over there back in many. So there the word kak is used and that's cited. No, I did not cite it there. Sorry. I mean it was back in source number one. So, first of all, let me state that this is interesting. Secondly, let me state that this is not necessarily as clear as it could be. And matter of fact, at face value, it's a little bit bizarre. The Gmorrah again simple level is trying to tell us, well, how do you know that uses the word? How do you know it's money? He goes, oh, take a look at the acquisition of the Marata. So I'm going to say this parenthetically and out loud. Sometimes the beginning of just like at the end of there is a piece of aata which is meant as much to teach you an idea as much as it's to teach you a law. There may be an element of that as well over here that there there's some substance that needs to be understood. What was the example that was chosen? And and again, I I I suspect we could have found other places in Tanakh where it talks about making an acquisition of something. What did it choose? It chooses Abraham's first acquisition of the land of Israel. That is not that's it is not something which is just regular business. It's not simple real estate. it is acquiring the land of Israel which is something which is holy. What I want to further say this is the part that it gets a little fancier is that I think that there may be this cross-pollinization whereby I could now take each one and learn it from the other one. And I know you didn't understand my sentence at all but I'll explain to you what I mean by that. Again the simple point is now I know that if I want to get married I need to have some either money or something of value. So again the custom today is to use a ring and mud right it doesn't say but then again I want to stress that aim's acquisition the land of Israel is one of something buying and or acquiring something which is the his amote initel is something which is holy. So in order to understand all of this, I told you we have to get a little bit more romantic. So if you think about the Torah's understanding of marriage, where do you find that first expression of it? So don't tell me actually if you looked up that puk itself, you'd be horrified. So I'm not even telling to look at the puk. So now you look, but if you looked at that pik that they're actually learning marriage from, it's uh it I I left it out. So you don't know what that puk is. But where do you find the Torah's first expression of marriage? It goes back to the beginning of Besid where it says in source number nine. And then the continuation which we don't know who's saying it. So this is an interesting verse cuz this is much more romantic and it's much more equality. I mean even in that first verse when Adam says that that we are one we come from from the same we're cut from the same cloth. But the continuation is and therefore see part of the problem is I'll say it again. Who's saying this? So if Adam is saying it, it's interesting. I mean, Adam knows about parents at this point. I mean, it just interesting. Maybe he does. I'm sure I've written about this. Um, in source number 10, Rashi writes, now is two possibilities how to understand Rashi. One is I think the easier way that you would have assumed is that God is saying this but although that's not really satisfactory or satisfying because the truth then said that God said it right so this is like a divine editorial this is the the editor the narrator is saying this and then he gives reasons for this but also could have been that Adam says this that that God puts these words in Adam's mouth and Adam that these words come out of Adam's mouth, but he's not exactly even sure how it is that he just now said that. And I actually like that better as an interpretation of what Rashi said, although you'll tell me also. So should have said it. The says, so talk about the the narrator, the later on, I didn't want to say the editor and I want to say the redactor. I want to say is that when God dictates the Torah to Moshe that this is added in by Moshe's again with instructions from God as but he himself but the reductant says the truth Adam said this Adam understood Adam understood and he said this right now now you see what I said that in Rashi before so again I think that in retro respect. That's the way the Radak understood the Gabbor. I think that it's not so difficult for us to make this claim as well. Now, here's where I told you, I keep telling you, we're going to get a little fancier. Let's go back to source 12. What is told to do? He's told to leave his parents' home, right? his birthplace, his land, his parents' home and go to the land which I'm which I'm sending you to now think a little bit more we derive is acquiring the land of Israel marriage is marriage is what exactly did Abraham do to go to the land of Israel? What what I'm what I'm trying to point out is that we have over here not just that we learn one from the other is that there's two interrelated issues taking place. You have the holiness of marriage, but you also have the holiness of Israel. And therefore just like someone cuts off their past and they leave their past and now there's this new holy relationship that is in essence what ad what Abraham does when he embarks upon this mission of now once you understand this you'll understand that the key and this now will be obvious the key moving forward of the avote and to be one of the avote and to be connected to the avote or to be disconnected to the avote becomes the the the opposite the inverse it's going to rely upon two things one is going to be where you're living again leaving the alien living here even though it could be at this moment we're still strangers here and that becomes this whole which is this holy living in the land of Israel because that is what this prophecy is all about the prophecy and the blessing and the gift and on the other hand it's marrying the right people to be able to be then deserving because in a certain sense if you marry the wrong people and that's what I was trying to describe before then you're receiving this land in a certain sense becomes unraveled so if we now and I'm going to say this again if we want to understand safer beration it moving up this whole center part of it we just now in a certain sense have to uh read all of uh look at the details one is source 13 is going to be important to us here as well as where we have the war again which I referenced before the four kings against the five kings and lo was kidnapped as I already said and here also Abraham is offered money and again Aram says no Aram is not going to be part of the division of the spoils. A is very careful where his money comes from and there is absolutely a parallel between what happens over here in Peryalid with what happens by the burial itself and Aram remains separate and Aram again he has acquired all of Israel at this point and that's something that we can't ignore but it seems to be that if he receives this money then that somehow takes away from this conquest which we already add no there's no other considerations over here over here Aram has been promised this he has walked this land and now he has captured this land and very soon he's going to purchase this land as well and let's not confuse this at all just like he doesn't want to receive the the burial place without paying for it over here he doesn't want to receive the money and I believe that these issues are uh are connected to one another at the end of this week's para we have another episode where Aram it happens to be he has more AA lives you know a long time after uh after Sarah passes away right Sarah dies at 127 which means Aram was 137 dies at 175 so you got a whole bunch of years you can you can count you know how many years there are and he he gets married again which is just a footnote and he has other kids which is a footnote but what happened to those kids and that becomes important source is the one. He's the one who gets things. They get sent off to the east. So keep that in mind because that that then becomes a theme, but it's actually not the first time and it's not going to be the last time that this is going to be mentioned. I mean, we could say the same thing. I don't recall if I have the source. The same thing happens with Lo. Lo chooses also to go towards the east. But we're going to find the same thing repeated again. If you look at source number 15, we have another relatively lengthy negotiation cuz it didn't have to be here. I mean, the whole story didn't have to be here. This is of course the story from next week's para, which I think we're going to talk about more next week. But Asov comes in from the field and Asov wants food and and Jacob then negotiates and and again the negotiation is what happened twice in this week's para we essentially have this long negotiation find the burial spot and we have this long negotiation then in terms of the wife finding a wife and I'm suspicious here because of this negotiation but something happens at the end and that is that he ends up selling the birthight And of course the only question that we have then have is what's included in the sale and we're not told. I mean one thing we know moving later on we know that that Yoseph receives the birthight and the double portion. It's a double portion of the land of Israel. Has has Asov just now relinquished his double portion for that matter. Has just now relinquished the extra portion or both portions? Has just now relinquished completely his rights to the land of Israel. What is included? And I know you can also claim that he that's included to be a cohane. It's included which means we're not told. We don't know what's in the contract. We know we know that he doesn't want this. But hold on for a moment. In source number what's important about the age of 40? That's the age that got married. So on the veneer the superficial reading is who is just like his father just like his old dad I'll again stress there's never any but this his father gets married at 40 he gets married at 40 over here it says but who does he marry alone find this absolutely outrageous behavior because what does do he goes 100% against Araham's wishes I say Araham why am I saying Aram's wishes because Aram had told the eved don't let my son marry somebody who's local don't let them marry somebody who's and what does he do and by the way on top of everything else he marries two of them at once ons if one isn't good enough let's do two I mean go go go back to write there's noto when there's two it's really quite the opposite you go back to Noah two by two onto the boat so which wife is he taking with him on the boat well he's not taking either because he's not getting on the boat I'm just saying is that if you follow the narrative you should realize that what he does is outrageous even though The veneer is excellent because he he's 40 years old as well. But there's something about this action which actually disqualifies Asov as of this moment to possibly be one of the avot because when it comes to the avote there's very specific who they marry and who they don't marry and we see who Aram does we see who marries and as of over here just now is going to be disqualified and later on in source 17 Because if Jacob does the same thing, that's the end of the then becomes disqualified as well again specifically. But I'm just saying follow the narrative. It's the Ben when it comes to the funeral. It is the in chapter 24 who a says to the absolutely not. And then it's Asov who goes that way. And then it's Rifka who understands because she she is the one who was chosen instead of those girls. And she understands completely that this is not someone who Yakov can rather Jacob has to go back and find his wife. And it's interesting because when I said before that the Rif was three years old, she then takes her own. She does the same thing. She leaves her home. She lives, she leaves her birthplace and she goes and she follows off to this land that God has promised which means she does the same thing and YaKob is going to end up doing the same thing as well. Again, there is this stress not to undo it by letting Gitiza go, but Yakov has no choice because he has to go and find himself a wife in source number 18. And this is what I want you to understand because this should have been obvious. do not marry a local girl which again that goes back to Abraham. Now you realize again as of one against this and you realize that Yakov is being told to follow the Abraham mission. So what is going to be the next obvious thing it's going to say? Well first of all so where will you get find a wife? Marry someone from shame not someone from don't marry someone from don't marry so now you will which is actually the if you're not convinced it's of read the next line which means this is the theme it's the dual theme running from the moment that Abraham comes he's been promised promised the land. He's been promised children. But there are conditions on how you do this. And the conditions that's what becomes clear in you can't marry somebody local because that goes against what Abraham has understood. You have to marry somebody who is back from the family of shame and not somebody from the family of uh of Kam. So this this issue then becomes when as marries the wrong person, he's disqualified himself. By the way, if you continue in source 19, he leaves. Now, you could say this is good. You can say it's bad. And we're not sure how to read it. Echoes of of lot having moved away. and where does he go? He goes off to the east as well, maybe slightly south in the midash quoted in source 20. He leaves because he wrote a contract. which means that was the contract that was the sale that was getting rid of the he made a sale he relinquished rights the land of Israel. So therefore the two elements which are what Aram has what he gives to are the two elements which Asov actually rejects and he leaves because he sold it to Yakov. He leaves it because he's not really interested in the land of Kanan. Think of the irony of this because he does actually the opposite. He marries the local girls and then takes them away, right? The two things he's not supposed to do is what Asov actually does. So, as I said, I'll say it again. That is what's interesting. Yeah. So, I in source 21, I do have the source about uh load. So, you see it again that I'm going in that direction. On the other hand, when I talked about again this dual relationship and again think of the main thing that I said I said that once you learn Ephron then it goes in both directions. Marriage is something which is sanctified. Buying purchasing the land of Israel is something which is sanctified. Marriage is something which leave your parents house and then cling to your wife was leave your parents house now cling to the land. And therefore there is this love affair with the land. So that's what I want to continue moving forward. First of all, is somebody who actually works the land and his children, we're going to see that they're shepherds. But is somebody who works the land in source number 22, he works the land and God responds and God blesses and whatever it is that he does, bottom line, it works. But again, this land is a land which is holy. It's a land what where there sorry is somebody who does some of those mitzvah and he separates as well. So is living in a certain sense in the future he's right in order to be a farmer you need to actually own land. So it's interesting howitzka goes a little bit further. There's a wonderful couple of verses in right I hope you like these verses you know it's time let us come back because your servants we love the the stones of Israel and we love the the sand as well this verse is quoted both in the Shi, which describes the love affair which the Jewish people have had with the land of Israel. If you're not familiar with source 24, it's the end of meot. We can read it in English because it's it's a little bit easier. When Rabbi Zera ascended the land of Israel, he didn't find a ferry to cross. So, he grasped a rope and like he swung across the the channel, you know, or the Jordan to get in a certain sadducey saduk. He said you impulsive people who put before right who there you said nashma and that's what he's doing as well you still persist in your impetuousness he said a place that Mosha Aaron did not merit who says I will merit it which means we don't take this for granted abba would kiss the stones of a kina would repair its roads ami norvasi would move from the sun to shade from shade to sun again going across the land barami would roll himself in its dust as and stated for your servants take pleasure in her stones and cherishing her dust. So again, this is the gar the end of tuvote which actually speaks about the obligation of living in the land of Israel. And I know some people are under the impression it's very funny that the raom doesn't count living in Israel as one of the 613 mitzvot but uh I'll just say that I I think that one can he doesn't count it. It's not one of the mitzvot. It's the raub doesn't count macro mitzvot. He only counts micro mitzvot. The us in 25 has similar types of verses and it it tells the same story you again would kiss the rocks of Ako and says up to here is the land of Isra would roll in the alleyways of Tiberia would carry stones would carry clouds of earth to fill what is said for your servants take her stones and cherish her dust the raam you can decide if he thinks it's mitzvah to live here writes One is not allowed to leave the lands of Israel. By the way, it's not immunity to live here. Then why can't you leave only extraordinary reasons and then come back to the land? You're allowed to go leave to do business. You're not leave. Your life is in danger. The prices go down so much room of a paper. Again, you have no money. So then you can go even if you're allowed to go, it's not necessarily pious behavior. [Music] And nonetheless, their lives were forfeited because they left the land of Israel. So, by the way, and and I'll say it again. And and the Rambam to say that to say that it's not a mitzvah is interesting. And now he he rings those we just quoted. So, we'll see like this idea of this love affair with the land of Israel. Yeah, I'm going to leave the rest of this. And whoever is buried here, all their sins are forgiven and so on and so forth. And I'm going to pause here and just go back a second. I I think what we're saying is this dual relationship that we learn marriage from acquisition, not any acquisition from the mah from acquisition, land of Israel. And we learn about land of Israel from marriage. Both of these things are involved in kadusha. Both of these things are called kadushin. And therefore maybe the main thing which I pointed out is that marriage is not just a question of commerce. It goes back to that beautiful verse found in berimo. That that's the key word. There is this emotional connection between the two and that's in a sense right that's in a sense what happens when Abraham is told and you go to this land and you're going to walk on this land it's this which this land which is being described and I'm saying and therefore is there is this love affair which is being described and therefore somebody who understands this will have to marry in a way and this is the whole center story this goes to a yakov This is the this is the reason why the those who are not connected get disconnected. This is why load ends up walking off you know east. This is why as ends up walking off east. And this is why we're able to identify exactly why a why remain the avote. It all is because of this d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d d is one is the land of Israel. Now just remember one more thing about Yitzk. Yetsk's entire spiritual essence is connected to the land. Where does where does Yitzk has have his religious experience? Where does he pray? Where does he feel God? Where does he feel connected? It's and the that's not an accident. Which means again this love affair with the land of Israel is something which the one of of the avot who never leaves the land. So he's the one who feels this connection to it. But I'm going to point it out again. If we were sensitive, and I hope we were today, we see with Abraham's words to the we should have been able to discern it. And if we couldn't get it then, then then we should have understood it already when Abraham speaks to his and therefore this is something which stressing. was Abraham leaving he was in the land of Israel and that is what's being expressed by the rabbis and the Talmud and by the Rambam and so on that the land of Israel is this place that is part of a love affair because when God made the shak of Ara and Sarah when God made the shak of Yeitz and Rifka God also God makes lots of shidim and one of the shidim that God makes one of the matches he makes is between the Jewish people and the land of Israel That's a sh that's and therefore a made a kenyan right there are you know there's different parts of the canyon you have the that's okay let me introduce you to this girl that's now you have to go and uh and what happens then is you have the engagement and then you actually get there and then you have the kenyan which is taking place and aim does the various kinyan over here there's one kenyan which is done by virtue of going to war which is extremely physical and Then you have you'll decide what that's connected to and then you have on the other hand this kenyan which takes place with the money and ava makes multiple kinyanim over here but by the way that's what happens by the wedding as well is that there's also m there's under the kar and there's actually the ring and there's also putting the veil on top which at least according to some of the rishim is considered to be a canyon as well and what we see now see is I'll go back to before it's the cross palization of the idea of the it's not just that we learn act Specifically here we learn but not only we learn each one then goes back and teaches about the other one and now we realize that what Aram did by purchasing this land not getting it as present not accepting that he is the king of them he's not their king Aram is somebody who will be king but it's all in the future and the kingship of Abraham is only going to be manifest much much later on perhaps through schol through David and so on but that's where the kingdom is manifest that's when the Jewish people as a nation are going to given the land but all of that's promised all the way back in those who live and understand this promise are the ones who stay those who are willing to inter to marry within the local population who are still were strangers in their midst they're the ones who frustrate this as becomes the worst out of all of them now you realize because he marries someone local and then he leaves anyway others you know do other you know do other elements of this and now you think oh yes he married someone from that's somebody from so now you realize that he's not really a candidate and we can keep on going down this line all that I try to show you is this is what's going on in the whole center part of say liberation. This is the issue which is taking place. And once you understand this, you understand why the avote continue in this particular line getting ready then for the next stage which will be the banim.