How to deal with leaving my family behind after I make Aliya

so good evening everybody this is RAB live from and my co-host from all the way from South Africa and live and just so good to be with you this evening and ready to share some amazing amazing Thoughts with you and so let's begin yes just with a little introduction we are live in spat we are doing a test broadcast tonight that every Wednesday night we're continue the cavana show live it will be streamed on YouTube it will be streamed on Facebook we are also recording it in the studio and there will be posted on Soundcloud iTunes ato.com and all the rest of the s social media and tonight we're going to do a test broadcast from our beautiful Learning Center here in spat and it's not going to be the most professional you're not going to have beautiful jingles and commercials but we're going to talk we're going to wait after that for your feedback to see if the quality was good if the sound was good if the topic was good if we look like you were hoping and we'll take it from there from here on we're going to start with once a week a live broadcast and with the listeners and viewers feedback we're going to continue for two times twice a week three times a week and of course we're going to try to accommodate our listeners and our followers in the west coast of the United States and also the east coast of the United States for us it's 11 o'clock at night well it's 10:30 so we're going to stay up just for you for the listeners to enjoy and if you have anything to say in regards to Quality sound topic it will get better we're just testing the equipment out the sound will be much better the quality of the video will be much better but we wanted to start and take off and tonight will be our first show we want to talk about we want to talk about making a and people that we actually leave behind when we make a and then the feelings that we have when we make a part is when need children grandchildren behind us brothers sisters and how how to fix them and how to also influence them to actually makeas well and how to help them to cope with the that we have made beautiful you know it's the a a question that I get a lot because for the last couple years I am pushing a lot of people to come to Israel and many people they they understand the importance of all the Jews moving to Israel but then of course starts the the regular questions such as what am I going to do in Israel where am I going to work how can I lead my family and a lot of the questions that people ask is what am I going to do what am I going to leave my family behind I have kids here I have parents I have siblings my wife's family is here a lot of the questions that I get from many of my followers is is one spouse says I want to go but my wife's family is is here and she doesn't want to leave the family or he doesn't want to leave the family so it is it is a very important thing to to take to consideration tonight will try to cover that to actually address that and it is a very very emotional topic because it's many many relationships that are involved and the aspect of loss definitely comes into that's what I've experienced in making AIA so I'm here eight months and it has been the most amazing experience at the same time it's trying to be put in both worlds to be in communication with the world that I was in before and in the world that I am in right now and it come feels like tears me apart a little bit and how does one actually deal with it I think you know many years ago one just c a TI you got to a boat and you made alah and it just wasn't the communication that we have nowaday nowadays we actually have the communication that is just amazing you've got Skype you've got you've got the WhatsApp you've got absolutely every single communication that you can have and I feel every single time that I communicate with my children my grandchildren I do feel torn and how does one actually deal with that and be an adjust to the new circumstances and especially you know my wife is for me to doah was to come back home and I experienced the exact same thing on the other side because for 18 years I was by myself in America so I left as a young individual I left Israel when I was 23 and for 18 years I didn't have any family in the United States till I got married of course and and so for 18 years I knew the other side that I'm far away from my family in Israel but the whole time as much as it was hard for me not to be with my family I knew that that was my choice it was my choice to to live in the United States for many many different reasons needless to say that later on I got married my wife is American my kids were born in America so of course I needed to no needed it was my choice to stay and every time I would come to visit Israel and and for visits coming back would be very very hard and every time Family whe whether was my parents or sisters or anyone who came to visit me the the goodbye was very hard so and every time that it would break my heart I would say but you know that's my decision because you make in life decisions based on your livelihood on your spouse on your community uh friends and and sometimes in life you have to be separated from your loved ones because you want to be relocate to to have a better job or a better life for your kids a better lifestyle and one needs to always weigh the consequences that I might gain a lot from here but here I I have to give up un fortunately in our life you you can't have it all can't have the cake eat the cake and keep it whole and and I know it's easier said than done but the the the way to to start beginning approaching it is that when a person decides to move and to do especially here it's not only relocating for a better life or for a different job here is already more of a spiritual reason why I'm moving and ideological reason why I'm moving there's many reasons why people do a it's not only for a better job or a better lifestyle but when a person does that decision one needs to take in consideration that that in my life I sometimes I have to again and sometimes I don't sometimes I I I don't want to say I lose out but I have to make decisions that I might gain here a lot but on the other side I might might get the the short end of the stick and of course it's it's each individual completely different and other people address this issue and they ask me question each person is a completely different answer my wife for example she's American when she did alyah we did alyah about 14 months ago and her parents are Israeli so she kept coming to Israel all the time when she was kids so she has some family here and her sister made aah before her so for her it was very hard to leave her parents behind but at least she has a sister here couple months later her brother did alyah and he lives right next to us so at least she has she she misses her parents it's hard for her to be away from her parents she constantly says Okay I want to go and visit them and H but she took to consideration that sometimes you have to make a decision in your life that is good for your own personal life for your own benefit and maybe say when you have a husband and kids or wife and kids and and she took to consideration that yes I'm I'm going to gain a lot here but here I'm going to have to have missing my parents which is not easy and again each individual is completely different but when a person knows the benefits of the move then they can start addressing how to deal with the fact that I'm leaving kids behind I'm leaving a husband behind and that's also happening I know a lot of people that one spouse got up left and the other one was left behind either to close the business either to sell the house or either because that's how it worked out so like in anything in life we have to know how to adjust and how to approach it and when it's for something good then you know we have it good in our generation like you said before in other generation something happened they had to grab their bags and run away and really leave people behind in danger he look at 7080 years ago people left Family behind to save their life and a lot of them didn't want to leave because they knew they'll never see their loved ones and they also got killed so we have it easy we have communication internet Skype phones cheap tickets to fly backwards and forth but and it's throughout the world and every single person as you say the circumstances are completely different and what makes it very very unique is the fact that this is is er Israel this is Israel and it brings home such an intense feeling of coming home and not not only coming home for the person that makes the alah but almost like throwing a fish Rod into the sea where you're going to actually fish around and bring the rest of the your family bone and that adds to the dimension of of the immigration of the AL of the emotions of being the first one to actually cross the road so this is a very very intense subject and that's why I had many many requests from my beloved listeners from who were listening to our programs when we spoke about making all the very very um was emotional feelings of and the very practical reasons foring and the very spiritual from making Al and what is it that when motivates a person to make that Al to make that move and then to really uh help the rest of the family come home because I think that's That's the basis of it that's where the emotion lies of that coming home exactly this is exactly the thing that I tell a lot of people people when they when I meet a lot of people in the last couple years one of my my agendas was to send a lot of people to Israel for many different reasons and and I got a few questions or I don't know have to call it necessarily a question rather an opposition right away and the first one is what am I going to do for for for job and and the second one is you know where am I going to live what am I going to do there so there was all sorts of opposition but one of them was how can I leave my family behind I mean I have here parents I have siblings and most of the people that I answered when they asked me at least that question was telling them exactly the same thing you will be the one who goes settle down set everything straight I mean in a few weeks we're going to read in the par that yob decided to move to M now this is of course even going down not coming coming up but we see that yob moved down to MIT there was famine in Israel ysep was the the second to the king and they decided to relocate and before yakob ainu moved the entire household then he he sent first of all some of his kids some of the tribes to set it up set up yibas set up synagogues build mikas get everything ready and then slowly slowly will come down I mean in the Torah when you read it it sounds like it happened overnight like a press of a button and 70 people went down to Egypt the reality was that everything in the Torah we we we we see the headlines it doesn't really say for example in our weekly par it's talking how Jakob ran away from ASA who wanted to kill him and he ran away toan it doesn't say clearly in the Tor that it took him 14 years till he got to he went 14 years here to he came up here up in the corner yeah he came to Thea of sh ever which is literally literally not even 100 meters from us and he sat down here for 14 years and her door so people think that Jakob pressed the button and he fly to Khan so in the Torah many things they're just said as a headline and then it jumps 20 years so same with the story with Jakob Jakob went to MIT it wasn't overnight it was they had to plan they had to get the Aliah papers they had to get immigration passports pack everything so in the meantime yob sent his sons to set it up go and open yeshivas go and open sh synagogues buy some real estate start getting everything ready so in many cases that I spoke to people who have this dilemma of leaving their family is that's one of the answers that I always say you are going to set things up you're going to go first you'll be the pioneer you'll set everything up and then you'll be able to easily tell your loud on come I already have a place to live I already have a job it's much easier than you thought and and then slowly slowly you can start bringing everybody everybody over and a lot of people will tell me I can't do the move because my family is Left Behind that's a good excuse for 80 years ago when you had to go on a donkey to to visit somebody now you hop on a plane and within 10 hours you're you you can cross the the entire half halfway through the globe so but it is when one really takes the fros and cons and says what am I gaining by moving doing aah and what am I losing when you look at the pros then it's it totally weighs out the the CA and sometimes in life you know I made many decisions in my life that I had to to to give up something because that's how it is in life sometimes in order to gain you have to give up something and you make your own calculations and we wanted tomato aah for years my wife wanted tomato aah 12 years ago and we were busy with our Outreach in America and my Rabbi kep tell you you can't leave now because you you have students here and you give lectures and you teach and the the communities need you and every year I would come back to him and tell him can I go already and finally two years ago he told me okay now pack your bags and leave but the whole time we really wanted to leave and in the meantime we also had the same thoughts we're going to leave Family behind and and we constantly had these okay what what is going to what am I gaining and what's what I'm going I'm going to be losing and we saw very clearly that even not on the spiritual level even on the physical level my my kids have the best life ever just this Shabbat we had a guest who came to spend Shabbat with us that used to Be Our Guest in New York and she didn't see the kids for like a year and a half she was one of our regular guests that would come every Shabbat for two years she she was one of our regulars so she knew the kids she saw them growing up and now she came she was like I can't believe not only did they grew so much the kids they're like different they're like Good Bean they're like happy and they're totally different and I said yes because what they have here in Israel you can't find it anywhere in there else in the world I mean my kids are still can't believe that they go by themselves to school and who had that in America my daughter's school was down the block and we had to walk for there now my kids my my my third grader he walks to school by himself he wants he gets on the bus he gets off the bus and they can't believe it they cannot believe that they can just walk in the streets and little things like you know not too long ago we had a guest and and and I saw him like locking the door at night told him you don't have to lock the door he's like why told him because nobody comes in I mean this is not somewhere else in the world did you lock the door nobody walks into your home in safe place so really the way to look at it is in anything in life you have you you you in order to gain a lot you have to give up something and it might just seem that you give giving up but sometimes like the the head of the family and the head of the family doesn't necessarily have to be the father the head of the family can be one of the individuals that goes and paves the path and that person goes and he does the first step and when the rest of the family he sees oh he's doing okay he he was able to make it okay now it's time for us to come too so I mean I mean I know you left kids Behind or I left three children behind in South Africa and broke a shin I've got two here in Israel and some grandchildren so that's really really a wonderful steing St however the the children that are left behind in South Africa I definitely left it feels like I left red crumbs behind where they can come and pick up the crumbs and follow me that that was one of my really really greatest prise and wishes is that they would pick up the greatrun and follow and the particularly the one daughter that I brought here in Israel is that she made like a gor an absolute uh champion and Warrior and hero and I just want to be here to support her and to encourage her and not only her but every single other soul that has made alah because in our generation in this darkness that we walking around in we need all the support that we can get whether it's our children whether it's other families whether whoever it is that we come across that we just smile at look at that comes across our path we are here for them we want to be here for them we are we are here for them really with the stones behind us as we are go Crossing live we are here for you the stones of being SI sick Stone these are by the way 320 year old Stones wow so we just found out the history of the building so this building is 320 year old building of course it was refurbished but the stones are I don't know if 323 years years old but they're at least couple hundred years old St so you know one thing that I I I a lot of people with the exact same issue that addressed there was a certain individual that Noto long ago that I spoke to and and he he kept telling me you know my family is behind and I can't leave my parents and I can't leave my sisters and so and I told him you have to understand that at some point they will come too and the way it works with especially with the structure of family some families it happens all together some families it's not the right time so you will do the AL now your sister will do Aliah in a year your parents will do Aliah a year and a half and and you see it in many not only in Aliyah I meet so many families which is it's always blows my mind to see it I I meet families that the entire family did cha and it blows my mind usually you see one person you see one person maybe two sisters maybe two siblings sometimes you see an entire family that do cha it's unbelievable I always I always I'm so amazed because most of the people especially Bal CH and and converts that they they there're they only one so the families either they give them a lot of problems and it's the same thing and and congs that usually they're by themselves they don't have a support supporting family I mean very rarely I find families that support the the the change so they have a struggle that they're by themselves and every now and then you see a whole family that makes chba not long ago I made a family that within months they all became B chba which is unbelievable and in most cases it's not like that so the same thing with alah I do know families that the entire family made alah within couple months and when I'm saying family I'm not talking a mother father and kids I'm talking about a mother and father that are in their 60s 70s and married kids I me not to long ago I gave a lecture in in in the United States in Chicago and I met a wonderful couple that made aam from Israel and made to Israel sorry and within within a year they and their I didn't ask their ages but they look in their at least late 60s or mid 70s their entire family within the year made aah one child made they went to bees another child made they they went to it was like amazing to see that the entire family did that and of course you know they didn't have to deal with this issue but in most cases it's not the right time for everybody and if I look at it close to my own home my sister-in-law my my wife's sister she made aiyah I believe about four or five years ago she was the first one who just took off and then we made aiyah and almost a year later my brother my my wife's brother he did aiyah so we're constantly saying okay now she has another two brothers and the parents obviously it wasn't the time that everybody comes together each one comes in their own time and and one more thing and the thing is that how how I saw when I left Israel to America Amer my mother she's Australian and and she made aiyah when she was 18 so she made aiyah only with her parents and the brother stayed behind he was much older he didn't want to come and and then after that my mother stayed and my her parents left back to Australia so for almost all my life I grew up that my mother didn't have any family in Israel because they all went back to Australia so we would go now you know 30 40 years ago I would speak with my grandma mother once on my birthday because it was like exorb expensive to talk on the phone was Hi how are you everything's okay good thank you I love you by so that's how it was and then you know we became very sophisticated started faxes we would fa I was like wow so and and we we didn't have this luxury so I all my life grew up with my mom not having her family around her and I saw how it's affecting her but on the other hand I saw that she has a better life she has a husband she has kids she has she has her own life here and unfortunately in life we we we we don't always we don't always have to be next to our loved ones unfortunately some people are very happy to be away from their from their parents of siblings or kids that's Shalom and it's it's from if you actually think about it and especially in generation the way that we actually walking around in the darking into things that t is setting things up sending uh one family member and then uh ining the next family member it's incredible kind and it it just really really for me it just shows me how much a loves me but that's what it feels like incredible incredible love and I think especially being here in the the love that I feel is just absolutely amazing and it it kind of supplements and feeds me besides there was a physical feeding emotional feeding feeding spiritual and being here in b Seminary for being more mature ladies like myself I am just so grateful and just feel so Ed and loved and careful and I just invite andas every single other lady to come here to B Maria and little bit of a in never that is hashem's love it is definitely showing hashem's love hasem it's also a good opportunity to to thank everyone I can't even name the names because there's so many but all of our followers and our supporters that helped to get this whole thing up and running whether they helped with their time with their money with their thoughts with their blessings with their prayers I know hundreds of people were praying that it will it will actualize so some people some people helped with with with money some people helped with prayers and I always tell the people who pray your your help is not less important hundreds of our followers contributed in their in each one in their way and their the unique way and with aem's kindness and his love we were able to me to to open this beautiful center it's already starting we're operating beautiful Shabbat meals and and classes and parties and we have unbelievable schedule in front of us now we're getting the hang of the whole live thing probably all the last classes that we have here will be live and all the all the Gathering a few weeks hanuka we have hanuka parties and many other events so till you get your Leah papers you can watch it live but better to go to the Jewish agency and apply as we know that the more Jews are in the land of Israel than we hastening the Redemption and that's that's our main goal and really when you want to do something good there's always going to be an opposition we wanted to do this beautiful Center it it can it only came with problems and every time we met one another problem and my wife would would get upset I would tell her this just goes to show us that we're on the right path because the is not happy when you're doing what you're supposed to do so he will come and create all these obstacles so every time we ran into an obstacle doesn't matter what type it was then I know that it's it's the right thing so when it comes to and I know some people some people don't feel it's their time and I respect that and I know a lot of people if they're doing unbelievable work anywhere they are in the world whether they do their Outreach whether they're getting stronger spiritually I know I have a lot of students who they tell me listen I I'm just now starting to take off in my spiritual level I have a good Yesa here I have a good I have a good synagogue a good Community I believe I feel that if I go now somewhere else I'm not going to grow as much so some people it's not really their time but as long as they're focused on what they need to do if you focused on nonsense on opening another business or or or anything not so important like that I of course you need to have livelihood but a lot of people their mind is like they're thinking I have to start saving now for 10 years I'm going to college and I want to invest in this business will take five years to to see fruition I mean that's that's not really concentrating on the Redemption but a lot of people that they say listen right now I'm I'm growing spiritually where I am or I have a lot of the students and followers they tell me listen where I am if I would be here there would be Shabbat meals or there wouldn't be classes I'm a very very dedicated student that he he he's not so knowledgeable but he drives people to classes and he creates classes and he brings stickers and and he creates a shabas atmosphere and I told him you are literally you're like you're doing unbelievable Outreach so if a person is totally concentrated on what they need to do and if it's not their time then good then they have to stay where they are but the majority are not and and of course when you come to do something good or to get an upgrade right away there's going to be an opposition right away the is going to come into your mind and start telling you oh you going find a job there's no money this it's terrorists all day long there's attacks there and he will come with will come with all the excuses why you should not make the move which in essence when you really go and look like the first time when I came to visit and I was like I know what people talking about here Prosperity everywhere building everywhere jobs everywhere and of course you hear in the news okay there was here there attack here there attack but you walk in the streets you feel safer You Don't See it you go to the to to the border of AA you you might feel a little bit D danger with the West Bank but anywhere in the world you have problems you have Terr attacks all over Europe you have constantly danger everywhere you go the reality is that when when you when it's a good and auspicious time for you to make the move that's when the going to come and and and manipulate the situation that you'll stay where you are and one of the things is how do I Lael my loved on behind so that we had time in our history that yeah people had to be separated people had to to run away 80 years ago 75 years ago families were separated into different camps they didn't find each other after that and it took years for them to find each other so this this is a completely different situation and needless to say with the technology and the and the ease of of transporting from continent into continent this is makes things a little bit easier but the major thing one needs to understand is that it mainly depends on like anything in life that you have to weigh the pros and the cons and you might find that the pros actually out out they totally take over the cons by actually even not making Al and I've seen that in other situations but especially when it comes to the point that you're leaving people behind you're never leaving anybody behind if you have in your mind that you're leaving somebody behind then you're leaving them behind but if you have in your mind that you're going to pave a path then you have an agenda that you saying I'm not leaving comes with Holiness then there's always there's always the excuse of the that that you're doing something wrong I mean if somebody will get now a job offer to go to Switzerland because they're making two three $2 more month they would go with no problem to leave the family behind but but when to do something in Holiness then no I can't do anything so that's what I meet a lot of the times people come they say I can't leave people behind but if a day later they will get a job offer to move to a different state they won't even blink the bag will be packed and within two minutes they they're going to leave of course on to also one has has to be also honest with themselves and say okay really why am I not going to live in just because a lot of the people have a problem that it's hard for them to get out of their comfort zone and and I know a lot of people that they want to make the change but they're they're afraid of the move so they have to hold on some excuse why I don't want to leave oh no no my my my parents oh I can't leave my brother or my child and again I'm not judging any situation I know some situations are very very difficult I know a lot of people especially in their older ages they want to do alah and they're living the kids behind I know a lot of older people that that they're leaving that they left the kids Behind it's extremely hard for them they got to the point that they're saying I sometimes in my life I have to also think about myself I have to think of my own sanity or my own growth that's something one to also take in consideration that sometimes you have to think of yourself no no other option and transition Liv the coming of and that transitioning is is absolutely explosive and I think the old person really really fed as you said now really feels it and knows it and lived it and probably last times before has Liv it and really wants to make that look forward in terms of guiding the family being that family yeah I mean how I mean we were in touch a lot before you made aah yes and and you knew you're going to leave some kids Behind maybe you can share your private feelings how it was because I I know you you were ready to to move already and obviously you made the decision that what's good for you which eventually will be good for the kids anyways is to to relocate so sh a little was very very hard decision to make really was an extremely emotional decision to make and I had to really really go above my emotional self my physical self in order to get exactly where I need to be and exactly where I need to guide my children and my grandchildren and my great grandchildren and I think no matter in Israel you definely have an affinity to certain area in Israel however for me definitely it was a very very subconscious and probably holy definely was SP and what is a plant here like as I walk around put the olive trees that been hundreds of years ago IE and just planted my new Roots down of and it definitely is a very one you're a worrior you need to be not a worrior in terms of worrying but in terms of being out there in the Forefront and it's not fighting something it's just ping away that is being for me it's making people a of and being aare of one's Mission follow doesn't anywhere else in the world need to find and that's abute not beautiful that's where we belong that's where we belong you know I I the thousands of people that I meet that do made they they they all they all Testify the same thing that they feel at home that they finally feel they might have struggles with with different things I mean nobody greets you here with bags of bows of honey I mean you still have to work here there's still issues but everybody has their problems but with all the struggles that we have to go through first of all it's aem's decision if I'll have these struggles and if I have struggles with with my livelihood I'll have it anywhere in the world and if I have any other struggles it's only because that's what has decides for me to have but the one thing that I hear from everybody with or without struggles is that at least they feel at home they walk in the street and I'm like this is this is where I belong I belong i i i i the air is different the energy is different the the shabat is different everything is different and we have so many guests that come from abroad to spend the Shabbat with us and they they they cannot believe it they just cannot believe they say the Shabbat is different it's a different thing than anywhere else the food is different the air is different the the prayers synagogues everything is different it's it's really where we belong and and and my recommendation it doesn't matter where you are and if if one needs to have a success or the other way around the other side of success in in their livelihood doesn't matter where they are that's that's aem's decision the one who signs the check at the end of the month is only AEM it's not how hard you work or how smart you are and if Hashem wants us to have a struggle we will have a struggle the point is that what do you gain spiritually and mentally and emotionally and when we come to our source that's what you gain you gain so so much on these levels and and and like again you you weigh the pros and cons there's always going to be problems and struggles that's there's no doubt about it but from at least what I see in we had the the Merit and the honor to see so many families thousands doing aah as at least if they have complaints about certain things I hear all the complains people are rude uhh this is expensive this is like this there's always you can always find on what to complain that's not not a problem that's the that's that's the easiest thing to find on what to complain but at least I see with everybody that they have this this inner sense of Peace because that's where we belong doesn't matter how nice it is if it is nice if it's not nice if your house is big if you have a nice car and eventually at the end of the day when I when I talk to so many people everybody's dealing with all their challenges and unfortunately in our generation everybody has their difficulties and challenges whether it's with making money whether is the relationship between the husband and the wife educating of the kids the teenagers are not listening this is not working out my kids is is going that direction I hear unfortunately all the problems that everybody has and everybody is dealing with something and one of the reasons why a lot of people are running into all these issues is only because they're not in the right place and and we know that when God wanted to to create the world he had to create two things space and time because in the spiritual world there's no such a thing as space and there's no such a thing as time so in order for God to create the world he had to create two elements that we only have in this world that's space and time and and we all know that there's a word in Hebrew that is called mazal now mazal if you translate the word is lck but it's really not lck you know when you have a birthday you say mu do a wedding mu do any you ever see mu why do you say muo somebody tells you I just had a baby muleo why why muleo good luck it doesn't even make sense you say congratulations I'm happy you should have happiness from the child even if you translate the word doesn't make sense what does that mean b says good luck so that doesn't sound some confidence that you haveen been telling me I need good luck the reality is that that the word masal is is built on three letters and the Hebrew letter is a me stands for M that's space the location the place Z stands for for the time L stands for either Li because we always have to Li to learn because I always have to involve the Torah the learning is of course learning Torah I'm not talking about learning math is that the Torah is a substance for everything and when you're looking at these three elements if you constantly live according to the Torah which means the Torah is constantly in a motion of giving which means when I learn I'm constantly the motion of taking inside of me what the Torah has to offer but if I align myself to the right time and to the right place that's when my mazal my luck so to say is becomes more powerful because we get our influence from the K is is the ultimate good is the ultimate giver and he's constantly bestowing his Blessing on us but if I don't reach out my hand to to grab what he's giving me then he can pour His unbelievable and endless amount of blessing on me but I have to be a vessel to receive it if I want to give you now anything then you have to either hand out your hand you have to come with a box you have to come with anything even if they give you a check you need a bank account you need some type of a vessel to receive what I'm giving him so first of all I need to make myself a vessel and I make myself a vessel by learning the Torah and following the Torah but then I also have to make a connection between the giver and the receiver I'm the receiver AEM is the giver I have to make some type of a connection so the connection is by me placing myself in the right place the right time they say in the business world oh he was in the right time in the right place yeah he was in the right time he got a good business deal so it's the same with everything I need to constantly align myself that I'm acting what am I acting what the Torah tells me to do my Torah my Mitzvah my my God-fearing acts and so forth my my charitable acts but I have to make sure that my time and my my place is is centered in the right place then I become a channel to receive what has wants to give me so sometimes in in my life I get to a point that I'm stuck now nothing works out so it says in the you change your means to change your location is changing my luck so to say what is this luck is this channel is this path through this path God gives me my blessings so sometimes if things are stuck you'll have to change your location now if everything is going the way you want to that's one thing but the reality is that most people they feel that they're stuck either they reach a certain spiritual level and they can't grow or they don't feel that they're growing spiritually or their business is not working out or their relationships are not working out or anything that they try to do they're in a dead end you can't find your other half uh there's so many things one can can relate to as I reached a dead end when you feel that you reach some type of a dead end and unfortunately most of us deal with these dead ends that the solution is is that you relocate yourself and you have to change your location and the time the time is has to be at the right time you have to know how to to to reach to the right place to the right time and yes now is the time of the Redemption this is very clear you don't have to be a genius to figure it out and if it's time of the Redemption I have to Center myself in the right place so when the time comes I'm in the right place at the right time and and right now we know that one of the elements of the of the Redemption is what's called is the returning of all the Jews back to so the sooner the better and also I feel that you cannot escape yourself you can kind of duck and dive in other parts of the world I'm not going off topic one of the things that I I said a lot to my friends and family is that we can't s you're going to find the S you're going to find the truth you're going to find what your purpose is it's going you can't St it it's and it's a huge Ling and I think many of the huge ra that came here Isel just for one visit came here for exactly that purpose is to find themselves true purpose what it is that they need to be in this world to guide in this world to in this world to think in this world to say in this world and for myself I kind of Lely level that's exactly yourself come here it's not easy the and take and find and it's almost as if I feel can do in this and be here for m is here I know it I know my Bon you know that that really kind of answers that topic is that when sometimes you have to think of yourself sometimes you're saying I I can only get out of the mud if I do certain acts sometimes you really have to think of yourself exactly like you're saying you need to find yourself to work with so he can grow spiritually and physically mentally so sometimes you need to say okay you know not even now I have one of my students that that he he has a very strong addiction to drugs and after many years of struggle finally B he picked himself up and he went to rehab and it's not easy needless to say and it's very very hard on his family it's not easy and and one of the ways to convince him was to say you're going to have to do it eventually eventually you're going to have to rip that that bandage off I know you don't want to go I know you don't want to be away from your family and from your kids and I know you you want to have your comfort and now being in a far away place with other people that you don't want to deal with and and he kept telling me I don't want to be in this place I don't want to be in this place and some point he just realized that he has to do what he has to do I told him it's going to take a couple months of hard work you're going to miss your family they're going to miss you but you have to do it you just have to do it for yourself now this is an extreme example but in everything in your life you have to come to a point that you're saying if I'm not going to help myself then I'm not going to nothing nobody's going to help me sometimes it's it depends on me I have to help myself and I know in a lot of cases people are depending on me it's a whole different thing but even sometimes when people depend on me sometimes it's also the the Divine Provence that they have to get up to be on their feet by themselves so I can move on to a better place and I see many times that that in order to do a drastic change then the action has to be very drastic and you know I was happy to do aah I could wait I was counting the days and every day that passed and I ran into all sorts of didn't want me to come to I mean from the day we were supposed to do yeah it took us a year later only to come with any delay that can happen happen but I see that what the the people who finally they make the decision and the the change then then then then they're counting the days to come it's only the the the decision time went through an outen you have to be very particular because the that's when he comes and starts coming with all these ideas maybe suddenly sends you a good job suddenly this works out this is that you waited for years suddenly it turned up so point to understand from that and that's why I always say is to First and most important to understand is coming and and you have to operate according to that and last week we we had a class that I that I was talking about that very few people really live their lives life according to the fact that any second Messiah is coming my whole entire life it has to be in preparing for that so A person who goes now and says I want to be a doctor and he's registering to medical school and in his mind him or she she thinks that in seven years he'll be a doctor that's totally going not in the path of think of knowing that mhia is coming any day because when mashia is going to come we're not going to need doctors there's not going to be Hospital there's going to be diseases so it's a very bad business to invest in if I'm already going to learn something learn something that has to do with the Redemption or or even invest your time I always give the same example one of our students in his 40s he he told me what do you think I should do I have X amount of money that I save and after looking into all the details I told him I think you should take a certain amount of money that you have and put it aside that will sustain for two years he saved a little bit of money and I told him put your money that you have in savings take this amount of money and designated to to support you and your your family for the next two years and in the next two years go and move to Israel and send Ina and learn and I would believe that 99.9% of people in the world will think this is the worst advice in the world and would not do it but he took me serious and he moved to Israel from Europe he lived he lived in Europe he took whatever money he had put it in savings and the rest of the money he put aside and this is enough money to pay his his living expenses for the next year and he studies in Isa he's older than me and he's in heaven his kids I go to school his wife is learning they have a little bit of I mean he doesn't leave live so expensive he lives simple but he learns all day long in Yesa forget about that he's in in in a different atmosphere the entire family is operating in a different sphere but at least I told him listen why don't should take two years if Mas comes in in these two years then you're great you're learning to all day long I mean there's no other better way to prepare and if Shalom hasem will decide to delay the Redemption for whatever reason he has nothing went to waste you invested two years learning toah so in two years you take whatever money you have left to invest in a business or you find a job same way you can find a job now you'll find a job in two years so you're not losing anything and he's one of the few that I know that says yeah mhia is coming and in a month or a week or half a year when he comes we're not going to need doctors we're not going to need pharmaceutical we're not going to need half of the things that we have now so what's the point of doing that what are we going to need is d d and acts of kindness and that's what will tast in the Redemption so the point is to live with the fact mhia is coming and one of the ways to prepare the the arrival is you relocate because when m is GNA come we're all going to move here anyways wherever you wherever you are we're going to all move to to El is we pray that three times a day bring us together from the four corners of the world So the faster we get it if we do it ourselves then we hastening the Redemption we don't have the merage to to to see the coming of the Redemption already from is and not to hear about it when you're in wherever you are and then start making plan your travel arrangements as you say there's not enough plans bring us all I I heard somebody didn't like my my my analogy that I said that there's not enough ples in the world to fly everybody in so they told me listen on an aircraft carrier you can take 25 ,000 people an aircraft carrier takes about a day and a half to come from America to Israel two days I don't remember the exact days so he says we're going to get all the aircraft carriers and put 25,000 people on an aircraft carrier and just going to go backwards and forward all day long they said listen that's a very good idea I know we have boats we have planes we have that's not the point of course is the the the the hasem has many ways to bring us all here he will make the planes go fast the Redemption is going to come go on clouds and Glory like the Prophet Daniel says so but that's not the point the point is that each and every one of us has to do some type of an action in bringing the Redemption faster of course I have to grow spiritually I have to add more acts of kindness more mitv keeping Shabbat eating kosher all these things I have to increase needless to say I have to go and affect other people but everybody is responsible of doing something and part of the acts that we have to do is is by Jews that follow the Torah they come to the land of Israel they are hastening the coming of M that's that's a a known fact and we see now the thousands and tens of thousands of Jews are coming from all over the world and you really see according to our eyes that hem is performing these unbelievable miracles in front of our eyes that one can choose to ignore it but the reality is that we seeing unbelievable Miracles how hasem is controlling the world and and and showing to us that the Redemption can come like that fast and easy so it's up to us are is one of the partn as well it's a it's IM mother the W that is going to facilitate all of that and sess that beauty that oxygen that's growth is going to happen so come home come home everybody please there's a lot of space in spots fresh air so much and people that are waiting with open arms yep from every single angle it's just it actually is mind you can't wak your head around the kindness the goodness the love and every single element that is put on Place SC the oxygen the the land the W the Earth it's just been so amazing beautiful lers Watchers sh de and secrets and and love of so we're going to wish you our listeners and viewers the ones who are live I can see down there on the screen how many viewers we have and we don't see the viewers but I see the numbers how many people are viewing us so uh first of all we going to wish everybody a beautiful rest of the day for us it's night and a beautiful Shabbat and continuing having a very blessed month of K have a beautiful holiday coming up and if there's any feedback from tonight in regards to Quality and sound it's going to get better because tonight we're just doing a test other next week the both the quality of the video and the sound will be much much better and we are going to slowly slowly get into then we're going to open the lines of viewers that can comment and ask questions and call in text in we will get it done very easy and interesting and it's going to be streamed on all the platforms especially the major one is YouTube and Facebook and of course it's all recorded it can be found later on on all the platforms again like YouTube and Facebook and SoundCloud and iTunes for audio and on our website at sm.com since all the the streaming will be done from the center of bam it will be also hosted on the BAM website which eventually will be streamed from that website and we will continue to advertise but just we can know that now on it will be advertised everywhere that every Wednesday at night Israel time it will be stream which is in the United States it will be during the day and we will with a feedback we get from our listeners we will adjust it according to the times and the hours and the topics H we definitely want to uh uh make it better and easier on the viewers and the listeners that everybody will gain as much as possible and later on we'll start taking topics as ideas we have a topic people sometimes email us and they tell us we want you to talk about this topic we want you to talk about that topic we're also going to have different other shows it will be streamed live that you'll have the ability to ask questions and and get answers because other we have many more guests tonight I'm the guest in the in the show this will continue being the Cabana show uh it's just going to be streamed on the different media but we're going to keep it the Cabana show because other show we'll develop more other shows any feedback that you have positive or negative is always welcome and in the meantime we're just going to reach you from the holy land a beautiful blessed day a beautiful Shabbat the rest of the month should be blessed and we will see you all here live in Isel very very soon thank you very much and have a blessed beautiful day