Most Of Us Do Not Allow Ourselves to Hear Anything New - Likkutei Torah Chukas "Vayaas Moshe" #4

the yeshiva dotnet I just said stand corrected I said yesterday the processes were national cuts up by let them haka like L which is the which produced the snakes Azaria says may fillet Cullen make like color which means a horrible food a horrible food this lotion from Cabela's mislead a cake with the kicker's word doc which could be defined as making the color because it's very subtle so our last point was explaining a very strange mattress the mattress tells us explaining the pasta can creation are before the madness behalf this are similar cat song we call the vote for become masters or become my dad we can understand what it means to love with all your heart with all your soul at least we could think we understand what it means but how my that's however not only don't we understand what a means of us don't understand not only the only honest I had to do it but on what it means what's become my death what is this book all my death if you want a real a real literal translation it would mean love our son with all your heart with all your soul and with all your very miss which is not really a word with all your very Nasseri toys my I'd very much with all your very nests with all your mom this what does this mean which is why the mission in Brussels gives different interpretations because it's difficult to understand one interpretation is behold my desk was my mind saw one has become my desk over comida who neither shall my dad Lak whatever comes your way in life here he catches it based on the word my ID which is also consistent with the mission in Barajas Muhammad Omid and that is based on am a Jewish the manager says in Malaysia Sabah and partial tests and Commerce relations my era the Kim is caller Shiraz avi native my Shem saw everything that he created and it was very good every day it says he saw what he created and it was good on Friday it says the end of creation it was very good what's very good so the Metis rapper says tithe is a malathion toy he is the angel of life meow eat very good this Malek amaavas the Angel of Death which is of course quite counterintuitive yeah good is the angel of life and really good is the Angel of Death I mean we would hope that real goodness would look a little better than that right so there's an old fort somebody won that one search for my heat and I'll to use if I may a Booker T was a rubber nice white Bush caution about Darcy see once that shot this is Maury anecdotal way he said there are two types of people in life in the world was two types of people I'll describe both of them and if one of them suits you you could raise your hand there are people who want things to be good for you if they want things to be good there are people who need things to be tight perfect not good the perfect excellent impeccable flawless very very very very good to the point that absolute excellence nothing less goes so the man who says if you want things to be good Zen mwahaha that's a license to life if you need things to be toys more it perfect so malachi mamas that's a license that is a cause for misery because perfection is impossible and if nothing but perfection works for you you will never have a moment of satisfaction all you will have is a life in which you see the negative and the half cup empty and yourself especially in your children some people the only thing they could do is criticize nothing else nothing else right the classic story for this is one of the better ones this boy was not doing well in yeshiva he was bringing home low grades and his father was very very upset very angry very hurt very pain fury ate it once he brings home a great they had a dance and a whole dancing exercise in the school and he did amazingly well he got a hundred and that particular Testament he comes home and he gets a flask the father sees the mark he gets off for us he says I don't understand top always you tell me why you get a 60 why do you get a 70 why do you get a 40 why do you get a zero I finally brought home a hundred for dancing what are you you should be happy he says really the hoots but to ask such a question you're failing in everything else on the host North Korea Thomson you're doing so bad and everything else but you still have the ability to dance whether you get this stamina to be able to dance you should be in a depression what are you dancing for that's that's why I have to chastise you we dealing with such a person it's a Moloch among us everything dies every every initiative does you also never gonna do anything because perfection is the enemy of progress people who need things to be perfect don't do anything because it's not perfect and therefore they wait and wait and wait and wait till after hundred and twenty and then it's perfect then everything is always perfect so you want things to be good yeah I'm a mitzvah the thing should be bad five but time a'ight fine unties me I do and you fix your fix you give it a second edition it's good fella that's what he said a good part here it goes of course to a much to a deeper space a deeper level in this that Malvika Shyamala cameras really represents two modes of life melaka Khayyam are those angels that when we see them they're so filled with positivity and promise melaka mothers are those components in life that challenges in many ways we feel that they kill us they could destroy us they introduce crisis they introduce challenge they introduce obstacles then whatever issue it may be physical or spiritual emotional or social financial material whatever aspect that may be milodon Manila - Maya don't think doctor ever says it's not tithe it's my eight it's not toy but it's my what's chattered small eat it also comes from a source that's goodness because everything comes from a source of good but sometimes the goodness comes from such a source that the way it's translated into our practical lives is negatively why the answer is because Yotes are all very hush on things that have the profoundest goodness they have deep infinite goodness in them because we don't have the containers the caleb to internalize them within our vessels so for us we translated as overwhelmingly disasters but what is it really really if one has the courage to be able to see the divine energy the divine feels the godly oxygen that fuels that fuels this experience this encounter this moment this relationship this reality that I'm facing you will discover that in this lay an incredible potential for the human being for his or her life and really for the whole world because as he says me PLU me men are his butterfly takes a her eyes from him evil doesn't come only good the question is if it's good that's comprehensive all that our eyes could see it and say ah this is gesh map this is delightful or it's a hole deeper type of toy which is a 9 Musa the toy remains abstract that remains mysterious it remains nebulous the way it appears in our reality is as something that is actually Malik um of us so that's a fascinating idea that it comes from the motto if I have to September the terrible coma that girl means when you encounter a moment of my oil it's a moment of very nizam oment of extremism this has to do with many what we discussed many times about the lights of toil but the light you remember the lights of tell you are deeper than the lights of ticklin but they break because they have no vessels they have no vessels so whenever you have in your life something that you feel is breaking you it's gonna break its gonna break you it's gonna break your relationship it's gonna break your families that's for Shalom it's gonna break your marriage it's gonna break your business it's gonna break your serenity these are not easy things to deal with nobody wants them nobody prays for them nobody asks for them but when that curveball comes my way I have two ways of dealing with it one is I go into a mode of depression or melancholy or sadness or the spear I surrender I give up I tell everybody that my life is cursed my life is horrible everything around me is evil and I just develop a certain cynicism cynicism comes from bitterness you know very cynical people they give up in life cynicism is really a result of fear I don't want to be backstabbed again so I just become cynical I stop trusting there's nothing to trust anymore so you just become a cold matched Sinicki make fun of everything and everybody and that way nobody will disappoint you again through there's no expectations there's no love there's no warmth there's no passion there's no joy and that's an understandable response because it's a painful life and it's very hard to confront pain a deeper perspective which one cannot preach to somebody else to embrace one can preach to themselves because this is a very heavy emotional journey this is not a intellectual philosophical encyclopedic idea it's a very heavy emotional journey but another approach to approach that the alter rebbe is teaching us here is that the person should actually say that despite the fact that it appears as an absolute disaster really Amala Hamas stepped into the life there must be that there is an incredible incredible positive energy that is so powerful that my mind can't contain it it's too big for me and because it's too big for me all it does is create a migraine it's too much pressure it's too intense but why is it too intense because in the place that I am right now I am not capable of absorbing it it's looking at sunlight and when you look at sunlight it's too much light and it therefore it blinds my eye my eyes don't have the containers the chemistry to be able to absorb so much like the light is damaging to me so what do I have to do I have to expand my horizons I have to open myself up to opportunities that I could never imagine all the opportunity that I can imagine where opportunities that I can imagine based on my limited paradigm of yesterday today I'm being summoned to expand my paradigm infinitely and you know anybody ever stretched here anybody in yoga Pilates exercise every stretch huh right the stretch hurts it hurts but after the stretch you open it up you got to open up the spine you have to open the chest you have to open the the ankles you have to open the legs you have to open the app you got to open it up we sit those little ace by Ausmus sitting you see the 17 years coughing coughs so force inertia Shawna cough come with the Chi you finish you bent in your curve then you got to expand but expansion is painful because you have to spread out expanding the brain is very painful the Allis tissa tea what does it called yeah elasticity elasticity the business elasticity is like an elastic yeah a rubber band yeah you have a shakhter they were shot a rockin yeah they're never good any she why do you throw you are not for that before your eyes huh yeah the inner EMS we spoke a few weeks ago by Chadron lay Nathan that's Thomas morning once you have our shovel in it after completely stretch and that means I I cannot sometimes I have to stretch so much that I don't recognize who I was yesterday all layers have to be stripped because each one of us has a certain way in which we negotiate with life everybody has their identity this is who I am this is why I'm not that this is how I live but when this curveball comes my way for me to catch it and not only not fall but be uplifted by it take the ball and run and touch make a touchdown I have to sometimes have the courage to be so humble and to strip myself from all egotistical layers that I was familiar with for years and this became my story my pattern this is who I am and it's very painful to go out of it so I could say it's horrible or I could say its toes my weight it's not tight that's for sure it's not the regular goodness either it's horrible either Tamala some of us or it's my it's this or that it's not just this regular good you know a nice piece of sushi or cheese danish i'm shoeless or in a good tuesday it's not that it's a marui it's an energy of my and an energy of my I eat if you don't have the vessels it shatters very very intense so you say the reason it's the reason it's so challenging for me is because it's an invitation to become infinite and whenever you're invited to touch infinity your finite self is going to revolt you're going to resist and say no no no my cup is seven ounces don't give me more than seven ounces but what if you're being invited to touch infinity how does a cup of seven ounces touch infinite wisdom out all the walls have to be flattened all the walls after mahkum are and ain't him in a mid there you have to open up the but we all have walls these are our walls right we walk around like this not all of us but some of us walk around like this yeah and some of us with Bullet vests and some of us with helmets some of us don't even allow our eyes to stick out we don't even want our eyes to see anything so we're just covered from head to toe with gears layers and layers and layers and layers and layers and nothing will cause us to take off those layers nothing there's Jim kit business research on it nothing but for this the person really needs to be putting mustard themselves Marsha's themselves on two levels monitor cells really stripped themselves psychologically beer emotionally I'm talking about psychologically and only then can they completely touch a whole new level of reality and that's the story of the seat the story of the seat is you have a beautiful seed seat of an apple tree you have it on the windowsill right you put the seed everything buddy here has on the windowsill seeds and cups for like 25 years it's a beautiful design for the kitchen and then you take the seed it's a wonderful seed doesn't bother anybody nobody bothers it it's a little seed and you put it in the ground you put it in there you bury it you destroy it you cover it up with sands and suddenly you become like an evil heavy condition yo should be say sir mitts of the card in and you say Kaddish on the seed and worse it decomposes it rots and the seed is telling you what do you did to do to me did I do anything bad to you I was on a windowsill what do you want from me I never hurt you I never heard of fly I never heard what do you want from me no you throw it in the earth and the seed is hollering ever hear this seed hollering and screaming you don't have such a fertile imagination and the seed but you bury it and it decomposes and it rots and a few years later ah it morphs into a splendid tree that may grow to be hundreds of feet tall and nourish a world with its delightful fruits new so what happened from one eh to another Yage you go through a high in a state of nothingness from a lower something to a higher something if it's a quantum leap you need to go through a state of decomposition of iron that I in is very painful because you're in the stuck in the middle you're not here and you're not there but it's in that nothingness that birth happens rebirth happens a whole new breath punim cardassia's bahlika a new face congressman soto you've my ID that's a whole different type of type it's tiny but it's my age it's a music it doesn't have the quality of being easily comprehensible fathomable contained by the vessels of the human being same idea this is the idea of hot didn't a not didn't and talking I love assertion this is the idea on one level it's din it's intense its harsh sarsen is the root same idea sure sure doesn't mean past doesn't mean future it means if you go to the source of it if you go to the core of it take a tree the root is not the past it's not the future it's in the past and it's in the future it's in the present it means the invisible source from which the entire tree grows you could look at the tree and you could look at the sugars of the truth every din if you go back to the Shailesh which is invisible on the ground you will see something else than what you see in the manifestation that sometimes could mean going to the past but it doesn't only mean going to the past it means one to the future it means going into the present it means going back to the core to what's giving it feels every remember every thought we have is being fed by something no thoughts live in vacuum we think thoughts are just there they're not there right your wife could tell you something another person's wife could tell her husband exactly the same words the emotional response is absolutely different 180 degree difference why this guy freaked out he wants to shoot himself and the rest of the world and the other guy is let's go buy an ice cream right he thought it was cute what does this have to do with nothing do with what she said nothing to do with that it has to do with his experience of what she sells something is feeding this thought what is feeding that thought maybe my youth my youth experiences that maybe the past you're right how I experience life oh I hear this boom he's the worst thing that ever worked walked the face of the planet worse than Vashti I don't mean your wife I mean present company always excluded remember that rule always in terms of sullen buyers I don't mean anything else right the other person doesn't that oxygen is not fitting it he doesn't have that so you always have to go back it's not a thought what's behind this fault but behind this thought is another false and behind that thought is another thought and behind that thought is another thought and if you can go to this origin of it'll be very sweet you'll see they'll always be smooth when the person breaks down and cries they're very very sweet there's no evil bone in the body right Lonnie Good Will Hunting that's past but the concert is not only past it's not about past past is often a situation where you could see it the content is the show dish don't look at the suit Sonia's look at the Plymouth what does he say when a person has his pseudonym loading l'américain of useful don't just look at what you see with your physical I go deeper perceive penetrate go deeper in the DNA yes not only the goodness is embedded in the DNA of the situation the when you tune into the DNA all you will see is goodness when you tune into the DNA level to the DNA strata that's the way the DNA strata of it means my dragon level all you'll see is good it's just too good it's too good yeah too good is it what are they too good to be true right so we say must be bad it's too good so what do you say it's not good he wants to kill me must be bad you know when you hear something really good good there's some monster there right there's some demon it is some skeleton no it's good it's very good but I can't translate it into my language it's lost in translation because my language is a limited language I have to completely let go of my paradigm completely there's a famous series of the synthesis of the rabbit rabbits called Hampshire toughness I'm evolved the series of discourses that he said over a few years three years I started to offer some of 1905 over there he gives a muscle a very interesting muscle you see it sometimes if people have to present he gives it a muscle he gives it the muscle of learning but I'll give us a similar Marshall but it's based on his metaphor let's say you have to present some very very like a speech of your lifetime you have to convince your board of directors you know to give you a life contract or whatever it is so you have to convince your speaker that she should move to another country who live Akali you're giving the speech of your lifetime all right you want to get tenure in your university whatever it is you need to get your investor your fifty million dollar investor and this this is the moment so you have to prepare for it or are you giving the shear of your life time with the speech of your lifetime with the lecture of your lifetime of the workshop of the seminar whatever it is anybody's field of work you have this once in a while and you look at the topic and you have an idea an idea comes into your head and you think you have the idea and you prepare it and it seems good and so forth and then usually the night before two nights before a few nights before you review it and all you see is problems with it this doesn't make sense that doesn't make sense and you lose it and to one point at some point that the night before a day before you are so frustrated you are so heartbroken from the fact that you don't have any material that you just you completely give up not only on the speech you give up on yourself you start regretting your whole career I'm I should have never taken this job I'm never doing this again in my life you make all these promises to you to yourself that you're never ever gonna get into this position again because you're so frustrated with this horrible product that you thought your Addie didn't happen and you fall asleep in this frustration fall asleep in this sense of despair and complete self integration you are the worst of the worst of the worst and as you wake up in the morning a little flash comes in a little flash of inspiration comes in which allows you to create something from it to compose an idea to weave a thought together to produce something fantastic most people look at it and they say okay lucky you had a flash but the way you said this sees it know what allowed you to reach that new flash of inspiration was the fact that you completely gave up on yourself the fact that you were so frustrated that was the prerequisite to the new idea because till that point you had the security and you weren't ready really to become flat them because you weren't ready to become flat you can't conceive of something new it's in the moment when you think you're furthest from the truth that you actually become closest to it because a component comes into your life and that component is the absolute humility of the fact that none of my paradigms work and therefore I'm just an open book and once you're an open slate then you can actually experience something completely new because you don't have walls that are protecting you from this new energy so the moment that you thought you were the most distant from the truth that you needed that was actually a moment of closest but if you would have known that you could have never succeeded that moment you have to feel horrible and that sense of like absolute worthlessness and yeesh was your moment that was your moment and that's why the illusion they used to say you SH is shallow made us all is it the whole Sookie movement see everybody that's where they start learning in yeshiva he or she Lloyd madoski tax years all years is shil Amy das all the spear comes because you don't have das if a person would have real dance they wouldn't have years on a deeper level what we're saying is you she's Shalini das it's the years that allows you to go to the level of Abdullah Yatta to go to the level of Chillon Madhav's beyond your das the fact that you give up on your ego you your shoes you give up on your ego ego basically says sorry I can't deliver the and you like get out of my life and when you crush that ego you open yourself up to egolessness and therefore to infinity so very often the moment that this seed is rotting is the greatest moment of rebirth even though at that moment all you see is a rotting seat a simple example would be it's also an example that's brought in smartness demolition somebody tells you you know your house is being destroyed tractors are coming and literally destroying your house you mentioned and you come and you look at this frightening sight then you explain to them it's not destruction it's renovation I needed a bigger kitchen I needed a bigger dining room I needed more bedrooms so what do you do build another wall you can't build another wall because you have pre-existing walls the only three way to build a whole new house on a different level is by destroying the old house but everybody knows demolition is not fun especially if you have a good Jewish contractor to take two thousand years this is officer this explains the crying pollachi asks how was I some allowed to destroy the base on McNish there's a law said that if somebody even destroys one brick from the base I'm it fish on ice it's seven ask us is like magadh varley act of God is bound by Tatum it's how can you destroy Bay something he says I send the book of NASA to destroy the base something is unilateral you don't they don't deserve it hide the base--emitter send them away like the Michigan wasn't destroyed the shot is the desire says that the first two bottom ictus were destroyed because they were being honored the baron ochs they were mortal creations Slimer built the first and Ezra and kemiya built a second they were mortal human creations anything that a human being creates is destined to die a human dies and his creations die even Lehman Brothers even Bear Stearns even the Titanic they grandiose a human creations but they're mortal but even coca-cola is not gonna last forever no I don't mean custom Rome Rome lasted to 500 years all the roads were heading to Rome but also Rome disappears everything disappears huh the Conchords TWA tower here the old cameras Kodak Kodak AOL I'm the last one who has AOL glasses I'm a weekend me and Rob I'll it's my last two people on the planet I tell people yeah well they want to know if I come from the apes so desire says human creations are human and they have the human imprint and humans die and therefore anything that is created by man is destined to die the third base emitter shall be being honored the kutxa bridge so we say every morning McNish aDNA kinda knew you down that'll be forever like a shovel so the Lubavitcher ever once said a very good schmuck of art so he said how do you graduate from a human structure to a divine structure if you're secure in the human structure you'll never go to a divine structure because it's working in order to gain the divine structure you have to flatten the walls of the human structure that militia is the beginning of renovation you can't create a new house if you don't demolish an old house so if you want to demand remake a new house you need the holes in the old house so now what happens when holes show up in the old house you could say one of two things you could say ie my house is being destroyed or you could say ah the beginning of a new house billion people everyone has holes that show up in their life you have a marriage five years it was paradise ten years paradise suddenly his holes everywhere every wall you thought was securing the marriage punctured buh-buh-buh-buh-buh one guy comes and says my marriage is over it's over who I thought it was good clover another person says ah the beginning of a new marriage but to start a new marriage you have to get rid of the old member that's what my sector gittin comes reform assess the condition you had to get divorced from the old marriage before you could get into the new marriage and so it is it's always painful destruction demolition is not fun nobody likes to see the tractor doing it but there's no way I can build a new house in other words to build a third base I make this you have to destroy the first and the second so the rebus said when you look at the destruction of the base on mixes you could see two things and they're both true one is destruction demolition and one is the beginning of the renovation of the third base some occasion both are true in our welcome what's Titian above Tish above is a day of mourning it's brought in how often children are as we say mathematician but we don't say passing on tissue and it's called a Moyet and the pipes can be because machinist is born on Tish the part you were Xiaomi says mashiac was born on Tish one attention what's trapped soon coming to three weeks yeah uh yeah uh Flula simcha Shabbos kazillion is called Shabbos concern why after is hezonia shy Yahoo been amazed I should cause a little divider shall i the vision of your shia what did he see he saw pending destruction Isaiah chapter 1 - I appear acalypha I saw a sole designer carryin Amana said that Yellen bhavati bharata how does a loyal city become a harlot justice used to stir well there and now full of murderers the whole Yishai is a vision of pent pea caliphs a vision of pending catastrophe you Shia lived before foreign buyers fish more than a century before but he saw it coming and that's the haft area of Kazan division comes amid said but achiever he says why sharpest design called shoppers Kazan know that's least the citizenship now y-yeah the by dick Sherman says cuz Shabbos Kazan means vision everybody sees the third by sonication if you ever had two divergent shot them it's this asked about about the Shaheed who knows that half Tyrell which few people know why it's called Chavez Kazan I'll tell you cuz he saw the Corbin but the jury says no cause you see the film estimate fish come on is this a settler plateau so more say this is called the city of Shiraz look for shallow shoulders this will you do by shallow Judas you say a cute word to make people feel better so that's really the crucial slave he comes and about dinner was always good for that right is it the meat and potato of Judaism well in the violet Anya didn't work that way land mr. Amash one shot and solid that cohesive it's all one the shot is much deeper but did submit is not taking away the shots he's just putting on glass he's giving you a set of glasses cuz I'm means destruction you Shia sees the destruction some people look at the destruction what do they see destruction it's the end some people see the same demolition what do they say it's renovation it's the first stage of renovation it's the painful stage of renovation but did she would didn't believe you should eat on Tisha both cars for summer it's painful demolition is not Koosh mock you already want the house finished anybody who you built the house knows what I'm talking about and if you had to fix an old house you know even more what I'm talking about but what is it it's not destruction it's renovation so was that Shem allowed to destroy the second place I'm making us you're a lot of destroy your soul according to Allah but if one condition if you're going to rebuild it in the same place why so there you're showing them say the Martha has a Russian ha who nice it's a billion victory when you're destroying a shul in order to renovate it in this very place you're not destroying it you're building it sometimes you destroy a wall it's not called destruction it's called renovation it's the process of renovation I can't expand my kitchen if the walls are intact that has to flatten the walls and build new walls so I can make a bigger shutters there's no choice breaking walls is not fun it's not fun so now taking your personal life person experiences a life whether it's in a marriage or anything else and things are cruising beautifully you know you're on an ocean liner if it went on a cruise a Massiah tranquil waters and suddenly who did tsunami hits and it hits ferociously and the curve balls are flying you know like in those video games you're trying to dodge them you know if you have one falling every few minutes it's good but you know those games what are they called we spent a lot of years on these games I mean they were essential to our growth in school MO not pac-man how do you confuse pac-man with this game pac-man is another Indian Paquin has a whole other gather yes imma flip the head and it's coming from all sides similar actually my god why don't you send another few and sure enough come on I'm doing well I'm doing great and you don't even have venosus on nefesh you flying from right to left middle everything is breaking up this person looks at their marriage they look at this they look at that and there's holes everywhere there's a hole here and a hole there and a hole there every way this cracks how do I view it toys it's not time it's mine it's mine it's an invitation to a whole new structure but it's a divine structure maybe your marriage failed because it was a human structure it was based on your own human ego your own human and securities and Oracle sometimes and maybe now God is inviting you to recreate a relationship that is based on a divine structure in other words something that goes to into a much deeper place your infinity can celebrate this relationship the third partner will come in Sheena shreya Bonet m HP is awesome and for that the holes and the cracks in the wall are essential they are a prerequisite so instead of getting upset that of getting into a depression you should actually embrace it with courage with humility but with stamina and confidence as you allow yourself and you open yourself up to a whole new light it is unprecedented when new light comes into my life I'm got my old self is going to resist it always think even sitting and hearing a new idea now not many people do this to be honest not many people once you hit a certain age most people don't open themselves up to new ideas some people already closed down at six that's today usually the age of adulthood retirement is 14 once you're 20 I don't know at a certain age very few people are listening to new ideas they go to people who they know will confirm what they believe in so it works right and we the religious Jewish world we have a wonderful way with this when you hear something that's a little new so either you says I'm meshuganah or even better if he's not a Michigan is not pecados and that really puts the lid on this wonderful he's an up Icarus he's a craze I'm meshuggeneh and you're done I'm not threatened everything can maintain be maintained status quo everything that's good he's a koi fish a pakodas this one as a meshugenah and the main thing is I never here ever a new idea in my life that may challenge me for real growth and a lot of people just live that way and everything is in that orbit and whatever they hear they put into a previous filing cabinet in their brain this works into that filing cabinet put it here put it there oh this is good right I told you once the worst compliment I get after a shear these types of sheared him if somebody comes over to me and says what you said is mamas like the Vaart I heard last week by shallow shudders or what I he put it into the box okay it's like the Charlotte should this part from last week that means either you didn't hear what I said or I didn't say it correctly but it wasn't the Vaart you heard last week my thought was well it's not a fart and it wasn't afford - you heard last week a childish listen unless I didn't have the skills to communicate the real energy of the mind but that's what we do we put it into the box and if it's a little bit out of the box we say the guy's a heretic there's not be Curtis of course it's out of the box he's an apostate he belongs a purgatory now sometimes a person does say stupid things maybe more often than not but very often our dismissal of messages comes because of our insecurities not because of our expansiveness so very often a person just closes down at a certain boy they never allow themselves to hear anything new they don't allow themselves to be moved to be touched to be swept off the ground and sore I don't want to be swept over the ground the last person who swept me off the ground I don't want to tell you what happened dropped me they just dropped me they dropped me from very high and I didn't fall on the part of the body that I would have liked the floor I fell on the wrong part so do me a favor don't sweep me off any ground I will just stay here la Adela I'm a lemon right until the pallbearers come that's an approach you like what I'm saying you empathize you identify right so we sit you'll forgive me I'm going to copy you so we sit like this we lean back we have an iPhone for protection in case it gets to us you can always go here right Bora Hashem www.weiu.net worst comes towards you can make believe but there's always somebody the text is Wikipedia two chapters Google to challenge and this trump to mock there's always something and that becomes our raison D etre our modus operandi our mission statement is don't move don't get moved on that anything penetrates because it wants to deal with this who wants to deal with might and that's where we become old not biologically old emotionally stale stagnate it and paralysed and God becomes an old man with a long white beard who just represents the oldest reality as possible there's nothing alive there's nothing fresh and there's nothing violent that's one way of living and then there is another way of living oh that's a good question how do you distinguish between opportunity for rebuilding or say it's time to move to another house it's time to move to another house that's also an opportunity that's also opportunity right not every ball do I have to catch and run with it sometimes this ball is not for me sometimes I have to run from it but that's also an opportunity so we have to remember that that's one obviously has to be able to look into every situation and see if this is an opportunity that allows itself right to be transformed into a tremendous blessing this house has hope we just have to break down a couple of walls and rebuild or there's so many issues here there's so many problems here that really I'm just gonna get messed up I'll just become destroyed here those are hard choices that people have to make in different areas and I'm not sure there's a black-and-white answer for it and certainly every situation is different every person is different and a lot of other considerations come into play as everybody knows whether it's in your marriage or in your business or in your relationships with families and so many other issues but remember even if the call is to run that's also an opportunity that I think that's exactly the way it was laid out the the muscle from the zyre with the mellah and as an designer was the opportunity of running away and finding the good in the running the way and in here we're talking about harnessing right now exactly the the prints were design now rather than that Marshall what does he tell her he says get out of here no likey I said buy you mine he refuses and we say that was that that was the mission that was the toy she was Ashley off she was sent by the king and whether the king wants what was the goodness in her the goodness in her was that she allowed him to be able to say no not yes and by saying no she actually he actually gets her much more than if he would said yes by saying no he actually captures what she really really wants much more than if he says yes to what she says she wants up in both ways the demolition is part of the renovation I can't apply this to another person suffering I couldn't ever do that and I will never do that I can apply this to my own challenges I can't apply this to somebody else you know what I mean I can help a person on their journey you know I want to talk about it if they want to discover things together but to tell a person how to feel I find a very hard time doing that because pain is very real it's emotional it's not the bursar philosophical abstract idea it's very real and ultimately this is a truth that the person has to find within their own challenge not from somebody else saying the person can only say it to somebody after there's complete trust complete love person really trust that he's because it's sometimes these things sound too easy that cliche oh you know just light at the end of the tunnel there's always good you know I went to visit somebody finishing availa so it was a tragic situation a young person who died people come in they sit down they start preaching better they get better Volvo's van starts preaching you should stand and he has great lectures he has a voice from here of old wedlock of course on my scimitar voltmeter vort Menachem er de tucumán he met amar Shah met amar I'm shift method of Akiva a game attack dishes live Amit and I am Alamelu but I myself indeed have better bet all sounds get the message ah this message was that you shouldn't lose your mother it comes to preach it comes to give a lecture in middle this one sitting Shiva he started to tell a story he says advice in demise I know the story he continues it I know what you don't have to say it so he turns to me he says so let me tell you the story I said I didn't come here to listen to your stories I came in to be Menachem oval he says no it's good for you you'll use any thousand as I said unbelievable you left your house to come to an FM avail and you decided you have added Russia to give the oven there but doesn't want to hear you're delicious so now I'm gonna be a carbon you think the whole world was created for you to give your speech he looked at me as a person it was up sometime of course he has what to say in the stance of sometimes he wanted I should sit now look at him I came to visit somebody here is story the guy told them equation the mind so somebody has to hear it two seconds lady said I'm alchemy knocking me ran away said bollocks reported on this one was the understand it's narcissism in a form of religion holiness you have to be very careful with these things not coming from a genuine place of caring these things have to come from a genuine place of caring if somebody dismisses somebody's misfortunate good not what he's saying I told you I don't tell the style the people this people have to discover within themselves yeah I don't think we can judge that I don't think that above that shouldn't affect you know people get harder than say why there's an effect that's that's ridiculous that's ridiculous that is part of the process when he says it's not Musa the toy is not Muslim that's real God made that - why are you judging yourself app read that a person can't relate to this emotionally is very normal and we have to give space for that and respect that - and how logically respect person doesn't sit Shiva and say oh it's wonderful I might move out though it's good what's the problem the measurement and everything is good why don't we we just said that the urban of the base I mean it is the beginning of a semi-official issue so - shuttle should be a great young boy - base-emitter ever the answer is it's going to be a day of simcha now it's not a day of some somebody who says a day of simcha it's again struts in Hashem Hashem is good he didn't destroy he wants to rebuild the answer is all destruction is painful and painful causes grief pain causes grief that's the worst so when people deal ajith Oh mais pain based on this it's a very wrong approach how logically emotionally it's not true sources for what sources that people are robots and zombies woman's were very hidden in a model a gear that they were called in a field ah yeah there was so Caitlin the position of a Nepali as am i said the magnet of misery it came to the market said he has a lot of suffering in his life what should he do how does he deal this gets to the position he went to the position for a few days says what are you doing here he says the Arab has sent me to learn how to deal with negativity in life he says you didn't hear him you didn't hear the name you probably made a mistake you misheard the name listen why he says you the wrong address the calmness katie is sitting in love I never had a bad day in my life the position was known at a very challenging my first of all he's out of money at no point are these sort of he experienced like Attila life as a relationship with Hashem so he never had a bad day in his life for him life didn't have any definition outside of a relationship with God he had a wonderful relationship wherever he was he's in a relationship season have bad but it's not it's not you can't say that this is the Derek for every person from he says clearly a man most circuits beyond this is it's very very intense could he know on a some level that it's toys my yeah but doesn't mean he can experience it always of course not and even if he's experiencing yet that's toy it's still painful the guy who's stretching in the gym want Pilates yes ah yeah he still says are wide say oh it's wonderful person gets a surgery they take out an infection they take out Immokalee yeah yeah it still hurts yeah why does it hurt maybe great but it kills kills they amputate somebody's leg to save his life yeah you don't throw a party Barker sure my life while ago may have saved his life but it's still horrible so a person has to have that schickel add a stress test just to come to somebody and say everything is good it's wonderful it's wonderful that's wonderful it's not even what he's saying it's not that he's just not in touch with the person's reality the best ofus was a long that's the worst could have been worse could have been worse that's all so what are you trying to do des legitimize somebody guys in a car accident is in the hospital say Oh at least you weren't killed okay fine let him sit kids osowiec complains this class is brought to you by the achieve Annette please help us continue the classes make even a small contribution at triple w dot the yeshiva net slash donate