Much vs All (Parsha Korach) - Tehila Gimpel: The Land of Israel Fellowship

you know this week I I know I say this every week but it's really it's really true every time that the the portion is always speaking to me and my life and to all of us in our lives and this week was a week for me that was it really got me thinking a lot about what it is to be a parent and what it is to raise children and I found that uh you know as our children are growing up and and going through you know these life transitions um I found that really the portion to me was speaking to that and I'll I'll I want to show you guys something uh interesting so in in this past week of uh this past portion of korak there's this phrase that keeps repeating itself between the bad guys to Moshe and Moshe uh you know uh back at the rebels and it's this phrase called that that that goes in Hebrew R in English it means too much for you you've taken off too much first it's said by kosha says we're all holy why are you more than us why have you bitten off more than your fair share it says in the verse they assembled against Moses and Aaron and said to them you take too much upon yourselves for the entire congregation are all holy and the Lord is in their midst so there's this phrase saying you've taken too much you have too much and Moshe I mean you can imagine what mosha is thinking me you know I I I didn't choose this position I I tried to get out of this position Hashem was the one who put it on you know you can imagine what he's saying and so then when when Moshe sets up this test of the incense on the pens and who is Hashem going to you know send the fire down to an accept and who is not going to be accepted mosha says to them place the fire into them into the pans and put incense upon them before the Lord tomorrow and the man whom the Lord chooses is the Holy One you have taken too much upon your eles sons of Levi meaning the sons of Levi are being told that same verse that korak just used against MOS it's too much for you what is this phrase it's an interesting phrase and it doesn't appear that many times in the Bible ra you just taken upon yourself too much where does it ring a bell from where does it ring a bell from at the end of the Torah in mosha tells us about how much he really wanted to enter the land and he says I begged and I begged and then Hashem said to him this exact same verse the exact same verse in Deuteronomy 3 it says but the Lord was angry with me because of you and he did not listen to me and the Lord said to me it is enough for you but it doesn't actually say it is enough for you it says the same phrase in Hebrew ra it is much for you speak to me no more regarding this man matter it is the exact same verse that's weird the same phrase that Moses was scolding the rebellious Levites with is how Hashem answers his prayer to come into the land isn't that strange Rob it's too much for you now this isn't lost on the sages because in the talmud in tractate s it says that hasem delivered to Moshe this bad news that he's not going to be able to change his mind about letting him into the land using the same phrase he used to tell the sons of Ley that they were asking for more than what they needed that they were asking for too much so what is the talu telling us here it's telling us listen carefully there's something in this story of korak that is related to mosha not being allowed in the land There's Something About This R about asking for too much in from Hashem or from your life why is Hashem referencing that story at this point in moshe's life say if Hashem is trying to tell us and to tell him and and tell us through him that there is some kind of fundamental error that happened over there in K and if you want to understand why you shouldn't be upset about not going into the land why you need to stop asking me this you need to really unpack that error understand that error and then it'll help you understand this situation so I want to dive a little bit more into this phrase ra it is too much for you you're asking for too much what does that mean I can't help I sort of like you know breaking my brain trying to figure out where does this sound where where else do we see this where else does this come from and then it struck me the meeting of asov and Jacob ASA Esau and Jacob ASA and yakob when these brothers after all these years of separation finally rejoin Jacob comes with all of these gifts and then what does uh ASA say he says no no no don't worry about it I have so much he says yes ro ro I have much in the English translation says I have plenty but it's actually the same exact word that we see with Moshe scolding the sons of korak saying you telling them you have much here ASA is saying I have much I have plenty I have much yes Rove what does Jacob respond so interesting how he responds he doesn't say okay great you know you have a lot I'm so happy for you he goes no no no no in verse 11 it says take my gift which has been brought to you for God has favored me with it and because I have everything he doesn't say no no no take my gift I also have much just like you I have grow he doesn't use that same word that we see in the korak story he uses a different word he says I have everything what does it mean to have everything is it like a power struggle like like one step above having much is having everything like you have much oh you think you have a lot I have even more than you I have is this a power struggle is it a flex you know and uh it's like you know kind of like rock paper scissors does the the you know everything beats much so here take my gift I have more than you that would be a little bit weird right what do Jacob saying here what is the difference between having much this word Ro that we see in our story and that we see here with asov versus having everything you know the stories of our forefathers are always exemplifying for us some sort of fundamental principle of life that's why we have these stories and so now in this story there's this Grand epic meeting between these two brothers that are two opposing worldviews ASA is coming with a worldview of having Ro of having much and yakob Jacob is coming with the world view of having coal having everything what is the difference between having much and having everything the difference maybe is that having much is always relative when my kids always are little and they start learning numbers they'll be like is a 100 a lot is is a thousand a lot and I always say to them well it sort of depends like if you have uh you know if your entire you know life savings is $100 do then you know I guess compared to other people that's not that's not so much but if you have a hundred houses compared to what normal people have then that's a lot of houses it really just depends you know relative to what you're comparing it to having much is having much in comparison to something else you can't know if you have much of anything unless you kind of look around and see what everybody else has and then you say oh well yeah you know I have much I have much compared to my neighbor I have way more than that guy what does it mean to have all he obviously isn't meaning it literally like he doesn't have all of the sheep that there are to have in the world what does he mean when he says I have everything he's saying I have everything I live in a reality where I'm not in comparison to any other standard because my relationship is directly with Hashem giving me everything in the exact right measure for me so paradoxically what's really interesting is what happens to you as a result of these perspectives two guys can have the same size flock or the same size bank account the same size Mansion you live in a perspective of much or a perspective of all of Jacob or versus ASA and then what happens what happens when you live in a perspective of much you feel bigger because you're higher up on the totem pole I'm greater than I'm greater than John over there I'm greater than Bob over there so I'm getting higher and higher on this ladder of hierarch of having things makes you feel greater well look at what Jacob feels when he contemplates everything he has it's so interesting in Genesis 31 chapter 11 he says the most incredible verse I have to read it in Hebrew just for a second because it's so beautiful I have become small from all of the kindness and all of the truth that you have rendered your servant for with my staff I crossed the Jordan and now I've become two camps when he looks at everything that God has blessed him with he doesn't feel greater he actually says I have become smaller why would you become smaller as his Camp grew it's because he's so overwhelmed by realizing he's humbled by understanding that Hashem is the source of everything and he's gotten so much more than he deserves ASF looks at everything has well I have more than John over there and more than Bob I must be better than John and Bob Jacob gets so much and he says I am so small in comparison to hashem's kindness to me he feels smaller and smaller it's a complete opposite mirror world view I felt this so much this week and I actually without even thinking I didn't know Jeremy was gonna get sick I didn't know I was GNA even think of this Torah idea and I actually found myself blurting out this verse completely spontaneously we had the privilege this week you know parenting is not an easy Journey ever and there are though these moments that kind of make it all worth it and I had the privilege this week of experiencing just being so proud thank God of my older children each one of my each one of our three oldest sort of ventured out into the world not not in any way related to one another or even knowing about each other into Endeavors that were really really far outside of their comfort zones and they expressed characteristics that I think as a mother I knew they had inside but they never really expressed before like things that as small children I saw they had in them and then they seemed to sort of fizzle away and they didn't really Express those good um characteristics and then they each went out in different ways and I saw these beautiful things that really only I saw inside of them be seen in like the objective reality of the world and be seen by others you know you raise these children and you see what's good and kind and and and courageous inside of them but then you never know like are other people going to want them are other people GNA like them like if they get a job is their boss gonna like them are they gonna have friends or are are they gonna find uh you know are they gonna find a spouse who sees that in them like you wonder like when they go out into the world is anyone else going to see everything that I see so so tiny and quiet inside of them and when there are these moments where somebody else sees it and they they come back and they're like I was able to do this it's such an overwhelming feeling of just hashem's blessing um you know for you know because you you love them so much and you just want you just want this for them and we we went out with our older children they kind of told us these different news that had happened in their lives and and we got home and I they kind of left the car and I just found myself breaking into this verse it just blurted out of my mouth after they left the car I said Hashem I have become small from all of the kindness and the truth that you you bestowed upon me and I was just sort of saying this verse again and again and it just came to me and then it was so amazing how it was right here in this portion talking about about this difference between living life in a you know in a in an Outlook of Ro of much versus an Outlook of all so maybe Jacob and ASA are giving us here this litmus test to know if you're in the right spiritual posture in the face of blessing you know it's very very challenging in life to face hard times but it's also a challenge in life to face blessing how are you going to withstand blessing how are you going to respond to the good things that happen in your life in the face of abundance that Hashem gives you maybe the litness test is do you become ASA do you feel greater and greater or do you feel smaller and smaller do you feel more humbled and undeserving indebted feeling like you have to now give back more to Hashem more to others because you got so much more than you deserved and that is the all perspective I have all what is Jacob saying he's saying I have infinite Infinity because it's so much more if he's not saying I have all the sheep that ever could be in the world he's just saying I have more sheep that it seems an infinite amount of sheep because I will never be able to grasp how I will ever say enough thank you to you Hashem to ever how I will ever be worthy that's the Jacob perspective and so in the end of that story Jacob gives the gifts to ASA because in an ASA perspective you're always going to be willing to accept another gift because you can never really have enough in the Jacob perspective you never mind giving away to others because you know that it's not even really yours and you never deserved it in the first place so now when we go back to the korak story with this word korak is saying to Moshe you've taken Ro you've taken much in comparison to me you have too much it doesn't matter that he has so much already himself korak as being a levite and having incredible jobs in the service of the of the Tabernacle he says I don't have enough because I I because you have more than me and then what does mosha say he says sons of Ley look at the perspective you're living in you're living in an ASA perspective you're living in a ro perspective you're living in a perspective of having much as opposed to having all nothing is ever going to satisfy you Hashem has given you so much as Levites but because you don't have as much as any somebody else then you're infuriated and you actually feel like you have nothing he says I don't care about how much I have this is all hashem's Choice and then he says you know now the fact is going to come down and hm is going to make it known because you guys are living in this perspective where nothing will ever be enough and you know so then at the end of moshe's life it's like he himself needs to be reminded because he's begging and begging to come into the land andem says you need to remember what you you need to remember what you've taught all of the nation of Israel you have exactly what is right for you essentially remember you have everything because what I have given you is exactly the job in life that you need it's exactly the blessing in life that you need anything more would not be catered to you I've given to you ex it doesn't matter that the rest of the people now are going in don't look at what they're getting you need to remember who you are and you need to stop asking me to change this plan because I've given you everything