(Part 153): Confidence and Calmness

good morning good morning to all and welcome back to another installment of living with amuna where we are all working on ourselves to live every day with a sense of amuna and to not uh think that we're in charge we're in control to not be filled with the Panic the anxiety the worry the Envy the arrogance but instead to live each and every moment of Our Lives to feel hashem's guiding hand on our shoulder his hug to feel his presence and his love to believe that we can and we will one day make sense of everything and all that happens I want to thank our friends Dr Ai and B Morgan who sponsored the am series for the yearas rabbi Dr Brian G who we know lived a life of amuna I'm happy to say that yesterday the gal celebrated two SAS and there is no doubt that Brian is smiling down from Shay ma his daughter sh had a baby boy which is a great great hopefully will bring great and comfort to the family and his son sender got engaged two Simas on one day and the gab should only celebrate Simas also a big thank thank to our dear friends Dr Aon and IET who sponsored this morning's particular Shar in commemoration of the Year site of iet's mother manl IET and ain's incredible work in our community thank you for all that you do and thank you for your sponsorship this morning we continue with our study ofar Schwarz the's essay does know and we've been defining now for many many months the notion of that to live a life of faith means to not see the battles the struggles the tension to not wake up every day and feel a sense of conflict which of course exists in the external superficial sense of selves but to be able to actualize and realize to be able to access the internal godliness within us and therefore to look at the world as operating in harmony to see the peace and the serenity to know that there's a purpose and a meaning to all that happens around us and we've been repeating each and every week in fact for many years living of Thea has basically been the same class now 175 times in a row which is don't panic and don't be nervous or anxious and don't get angry take that deep breath and realize let go and let Hashem there is one above put our trust and faith in him and realize that after we've done all that we can and we've taken the initiative that we can it is in his hands and it's up to him so we're living in these two worlds simultaneously and of Schwarz has been careful to emphasize over and over that these worlds it's not that one is true and one is a lie it's not that one is authentic and one is counterfeit they're both true simultaneously it is true that around us is a world filled with tension and doubt and uncertainty and conflict and Challenge and challenge constantly whether it's challenges in insignificant negligible ways like fighting the battle for the corn chips or whether it's much more meaningful challenges like a person gets bad news or suffers suffers loss or suffers something terrible and needs to find a way to persevere nonetheless so we battle every day and that is a true world that we are living in but we can let that Define and inform who we are we can let that capture our emotions our attitude our philosophy our mental health emotional health spiritual health or we can live in that world and fight those battles because they are real and nevertheless the true us is the internal sense of self the true us is the one with the the the one who says I walk into the city I have a confidence and a calmness because I know that whatever turns out and however it works out it is the way it is meant to be my daughter mitm is getting married August 4th now in New York and we have to quarantine in New York for 2 weeks before we can see anyone or celebrate a wedding soem B and Har with hm's help we're going to try to go to New York at the end of next week and we found a home and we are going to lock ourselves in and we are going to have two weeks of quaran Torah where all the shum will come on Zoom from quaran Torah from our quarantine in New York but now we're nervous what happens God forbid if one of us catch it before next week how do we travel we don't have it please God we won't catch it nobody should be nervous andem so you could either panic and worry and you could say what will be or you could say I'm going to take all the precautions follow all the guidelines I'm going to be as careful as I can be and then at the end I have to let go I have to let Hashem externally there's a lot of calculations do we go out and who do we see and how do we operate but internally you say I do the best I can and the rest is up to Hashem he's got a master plan I can be confident and I can be calm I don't have to panic I don't have to worry and I don't have to fear because and again I'm just giving you every one of us we can turn the sound on I could take you off mute and I'm sure we can go one by one on zoom on Facebook on YouTube on all the different platforms that we're learning together right now and I'm sure every one of us could describe what they're going through in their lives that they are struggling or panicking and how they nonetheless have to persevere and remember to let go and let God remember to say I'll do the best I can and after that what am I going to be anxious and worried what am I going to have sleepless nights is that going to actually change anything all it will do is make things worse in fact the warrior anxiety will lower your immune system and make you more vulnerable and susceptible to the very thing that you're so worried you're going to get so it is counterproductive it actually exposes you and makes more V more vulnerable to exactly what you're trying to avoid it makes no sense it's illogical rather rather we have to work on we have to constantly work on we have to on a regular basis work on doing all that we can doesn't mean we could cop out take the easy way out or the lazy way out and not do what we have to do we have to take our initiative we have to make our effort we have to be partners with Hashem but once we've done our part and once we've done all we can we've planned we put the guidelines in place and we're operating at the best we can at that point it's time to let go and to let Hashem I saw something very interesting very beautiful by y y Jacobson in his Tor shabas he quoted the Austrian British philosopher Ludwick wienstein anyone ever hear of him Ludwick wienstein he lived 1889 to 1951 I'd never heard of him not that I am so steeped in philosophy he's considered by many to be one of the greatest philosophers of the 20th century and he once said that his aim the aim of a philosopher is quote to show the fly the way out of the bottle to show the fly the way out of the bottle I read the quote and I said what does that mean so explains what it means is you ever see a fly caught in a bottle it is flying around banging against the walls the bottom of the bottle it just keeps banging its head against the glass in vain attempting to get out and the more it tries the more it fails until it drops from exhaustion and maybe even worse and the one thing it forgets to do is look up to the sky because if it looked up to the sky it would find the opening and it would find the way out and he said that's his mission as a philosopher to show the fly the way out of the bottle we are living our lives and we're banging our head against the wall we're banging banging our head against the walls of the bottle and we're trying to get out we're trying to get out of this place of doubt and uncertainty the place of panic and anxiety and how are we trying to get out by banging our heads against the bottle but if only we'd look up we'd see the opening if only we'd look look up we'd see the way out out if only we'd look up towards the heavens Towards the Sky we would know we could stop banging our head against the wall and we'd find the way we'd find the way forward such a beautiful depiction I found it fantastic the image of the fly banging its head in the bottle if only we'd look up towards the sky we'd find the way out and that is the way so many of us are living Our Lives we're banging our head against the bottle and we are literally injuring ourselves emotionally spiritually physically we're injuring ourselves we're harming ourselves by banging our head against the wall by thinking it's up to us by trying try to get answers to questions that have no answers and instead we look up towards the sky we'll find that opening we could find our way out okay continuing in this essay The NeverEnding constantly giving called this essay of R Schwarz and he says the following we live in both these worlds simultaneously we're operating in the physical world and there's something called a virus and it is there's something called spread and contagion and there are decisions that have to be made and planning that has to be done and we're living in a world in which there are external forces there are Temptations in the world of food and wellness there are Temptations in the world of honesty and integrity there are Temptations in the world of immorality and promiscuity there are Temptations in the world of gossip and slander there are Temptations in the world of laziness and procrastination there are no shortages of areas of our life where we're battling from the moment with wake up until we fall asleep but we also have that internal voice that sense of self that calmness that confidence that godliness and the question is which defines us which one are we really or put differently and again I've repeated this a million times and I'll tell you now I'm going to repeat it a million more if you don't want to hear it don't sign on and that is you could look at yourself and you can Define yourself as I am a body and I have a soul if you ask most people they'll say who am I I'm the one you see in the mirror who am I the one who goes for the Manny Petty the one who gets their hair done who who am I the one who tries to keep up with the style and the fashion the FED who am I the one who goes to the adjustment at the chiropractor and the massage who am I the one who enjoys the delicious food who am I what I see in the mirror and what my lab report comes back with that's who I am oh yeah also I heard in sh once from a rabbi that I have a soul I'm a body and I also heard once that I think I read it somewhere that I have a soul I don't know what it means I've never been in contact with it it's never been nourished and never been alive I don't know what it means but I read it somewhere I heard it once that's not the Jewish way of life that's not our philosophy or our approach it's in fact exactly the opposite yeah I have a body it needs to be taken care of and it can even be pampered there's no reason not to indulge it can enjoy the pleasures of this world but it should never Define who I am who am I I am a soul I am a soul oh yeah I also think I once saw in a mirror that I have a body who am I at my core what is my Essence I'm a a I'm a soul my memories my experiences my conversations my relationships my aspirations my ambition my godliness my sense of discipline my Yearning For Truth for Holiness for purpose for meaning that's who I am I am a soul oh yeah I once passed a mirror and I noticed that I also have a body confusing the soul and the body is as foolish as confusing your clothing with who you are your clothing you put on in the morning and you take off at night and while you might enjoy nice clothing and you might indulge in fashion or fed or Comfort or customade but you never confuse it with who you are you take off you shed that clothing at night well our body we put on when we were born the soul was put into the body and at the end of 120 years we will shed the body like a person disres like they take off their clothing after 120 and it is as foolish to think that the body is who we are as it would be to think that the clothing is part organically of who we are we are a soul that has a body we are not a body that has a soul as I said I've said it so many times and I'll continue to say it until we believe it until we live it until we know it because it is so critical so critical to be able to live a life of so where did we go wrong Schwarz why is this so hard why is once a week living with amuna not enough it's not enough because in between every Wednesday morning we forget on Wednesdays we reinforce for ourselves we have our support group and we remember oh yeah let go let God what do you panic what do you worry do best and after that it's up to him this meaning there's purpose there's order there's a reason let go and that carries us till let's say classes 845 to 9:20 9:30 by 10: a.m. we're back to where we were it's so hard it's so hard to remember when you see the news of the data when you hear what's going on around us when you worry when you're filled with anxiousness or you tempted towards anger it's so hard why is it so hard and what is the strategy to overcome it so barash Schwarz helps us how do we get out right we look up and we see the opening in the bottle we see the sky and then instead of flying through it or even if we've escaped it we go back in the bottle and bang our head against the walls once again why the answer to it is very simple I spoke about it last night we started a new series on Tuesday nights at 9 p.m. can listen to it on Tor or Rabbi go.org about the best version of you and we spoke about mindfulness you cannot be the best version of you if you cannot control your thoughts if you are not present in your thinking your strategy your decision- making if you are somebody who just impulsively compulsively does whatever you want follows whatever you feel that's a world of addiction it's a world of of compulsion you simply say what comes to your mind you eat what comes to your appetite you go and you do and you look at what you want to do in that moment and you never stop and think that there's no self-awareness there's never introspection or reflection there's never margin or space to stop and think and say what is the wisdom of this and what will be the outcome of this and will this harm me or is this good for me how will it be responded to and how will it land and what's right Bon we need to think it is a lost art in our time and our age there's too much noise and too much interference and too much static that we don't have the ability to stop and to to think to stop and to think I once attended Kellog management school for a month for an executive seminar and one of the people who presented to us was the CEO of a company that had literally 100,000 employees and he described to us that he has on a schedule actually at the time to go outside to his car and to leave his phone in his office and to stop and to think he had it in his schedule thinking time thinking time thinking time anyone have that in their Outlook or Google Calendar time to think to put their phone on airplane mode to disconnect to actual schedule time to think it could be while going for a walk or it could be with a drive in silence or it could be sitting in your home quaranta quarantining it could be just sitting and thinking sitting and thinking what are the problems what are the dilemas you're trying to think through what are the calming that you're trying to do for yourself how do you want to reorient or recalibrate where you're feeling emotionally intellectually spiritually time to think Bon we are running at such a Rat Race and even in the world that slowed us down this pandemic we're still operating in hyper super speed and we don't have time to think there's so much noise there's so much interference media social media news we don't have time to think to be mindful to be present to be contemplative to be reflective so how are you going to have breakthrough how are we going to reorient how are we going to do a paradig shift in our thinking if we don't have time or the ability to stop and to think my friend Lenny shares that doctors are showing practicing mindfulness Wards off Alzheimer disease dementia mental slow uh slowing down mentally is mindfulness which makes a lot of sense if you don't use your mind you're going to use lose it now I don't mean using your mind because we still are you know working or having conversations or debating politics and Echo Chambers I don't really consider that using our minds it's more using our mouths it's using our reaction time using our minds is stopping to think processing calibrating har the beginning of the solution the beginning of the of the treatment the beginning of the medicine that we have to take in order to recalibrate and reorient in order to be able to live the lives that we want to be living the calmness the serenity the confidence it begins with thoughtfulness and presence of mind you find quiet and peace and you enter your inner world have you ever been there before do you know how to get in there do you know what it looks like or sounds like or feels like can you be comfortable there or is it so uncomfortable is it so uncomfortable I've spoken about and written about the time that I had a friend who was trying to help me overcome technology addiction and when I went to see him he took my technology and importantly he went through the ritual the visual ritual of locking my technology in a briefcase and denying me access to it for the day that I'd be with him and at first it was like he asked for my kidneys and my liver and my heart and to lock it away and to deny me access to it but by the end it's literally like going cold turkey on an addiction you can't enter your own world if there's something buzzing and beeping and vibrating in your pocket or or you're just tempted to check the notifications and look what am I missing with a sense of fomo how do you get into that world how do you get into that inner place and Inner Space how do you feel comfortable once you're there how do you hear your Nish talking to you listening to you how do you get there and how do you learn from rman had an idea Zinger brings it down someone who was our guest ear this year you know we talk to Hashem with daving but Hashem answers us also sometimes with his bodus and his Bon with self-reflection and meditation what do I mean by that we all have theim within us we have godliness within us we not only believe in God we believe in the God within ourselves so sometimes when God is trying to speak to us he's saying how can you listen to me by listening to yourself your inner voice turn off the noise turn off the static turn off the interference and listen to your Nish listen to your P listen to your conscience listen to listen to your Bo listen to what it's telling you I'm speaking to you from within you but there's so much noise and so much Netflix and so much going on how are you going to hear it shut down disconnect schedule time be mindful and spend and and schedule time to simply be lost in your own thoughts to listen to Hashem talking to you through you through you person sits so what happens when you sit in the quiet and you try to get into that place and you try to listen to yourself you realize I have the capacity for trust I have the capacity for calm we've redefined doesn't just mean Faith as in a leap of faith or a blind faith but means I have calmness and I have confidence so you begin by saying where's my calmness and where's my confidence maybe I believe in Dr fouchy maybe I believe in the stock market maybe I believe in what I'm reading maybe I believe in myself I have self-confidence you first acknowledge the notion of the capacity for confidence and calmness what do I believe in who do I believe in is there an expert is there a powerful person is there a personality is there something someone around me that I have trust TR in that I can put Faith in that I have confidence in and therefore I feel a calmness from and when we create that Foundation that nugget that seed when we can really let go and submit to a notion of confidence and calmness in something else then now we can begin to expand upon that now we can build upon it where does that come from where does it come from my ability and my capacity to have calmness and confidence where does that come from from how do I generate that what does it feel like so for example I finished my cup of coffee let's go back to that example where a person says I have a cup I have a bucket I have a pale I have a mug of coffee of water and you say to yourself okay I'd like to lift it up I'm going to make a cup of coffee and I'm going to drink it am I confident I can get it done some of you men I see are not even confident you can make a cup of coffee but most people should be confident they can make a cup of coffee do I have a confidence I can make the cup of coffeee yes am I confident I can lift it to my mouth and not spill it all over my shirt and tie I hope so at this stage of my life I hope I have enough strength and Agility I hope I have enough balance in my hand that I could take the cup to my mouth and not spill it all over and not burn myself and not burn myself terribly so where does that come from where does that come from that I believe that I can lift the cup that I can make the cup of coffee that I can enjoy it and not spill it on my face how do I know nobody will bump into me or somebody won't get it before me how do I know that I can hold on and it won't slip out maybe my hand will recoil from the heat maybe it will be slippery from condensation how do I know I can lift my hand what if my brain is giving instructions to my arm at the muscles are not listening the joints are not functioning how do I know there won't spring a hole in the bottom of the cup and it won't leak everywhere so you sit there here's here's the thought you ready here's the exercise for everybody here's your exercise do it today you have until next Wednesday the exercise is to take that cup of coffee and to ask yourself all those questions how do I know it won't slip how do I know it won't spring a hole how do I know it won't burn my mouth how do I know I won't SP it how do I know my muscles and my joints will be able to lift it mear who says who says who says this doesn't sound like a very smart exercise for a group working on but the exercise is to ask yourself mear how do I know maybe it everything will go wrong let me imagine everything go wrong and let me ask myself me who said it will go right what I'm trying to do is I'm trying to collect Every Voice or thought of opposition of obstacle of a friction that I can imagine that can make this go wrong and what is the sum total what is the result if I can imagine and I can write out a list of everything that could go wrong every reason this won't go right every obstacle every friction every tension every battle that I'm facing in order to lift the cup of coffee to my lips and for it to go right what will I realize as a result I will realize as a result is it guaranteed is it guaranteed is it guaranteed I can lift the cup of coffee and drink it safely says shorts the following I don't have confidence all the things that have to happen in the natural order have to happen naturally at my age and my good health and my athleticism I should be able to lift a cup of coffee naturally naturally there's nothing about the cup of coffee the cup is manufactured it looks like it's made well Dixie Cups excellent company should be able to not spring a leak no reason to believe that my arms my joint my muscles won't work no reason to believe that it'll slip out of my hand condensation that never happened before there are a whole list of things beta in the natural order that support my confidence and notion that it's all going to go right nothing will go wrong but if you believe in Hashem you know that there's no such thing as nature what's natural becomes Supernatural what's ordinary is extraordinary extraordinary ordinary K tells us the story of the great Rabbi whose wife is crying because she doesn't have oil to light for shabas so he says take vinegar she says vinegar vinegar doesn't ignite it doesn't light he said the one who told oil to light will tell the vinegar to light you know what the difference is between oil and vinegar we've come to expect oil to light so we think it's natural we think it's supposed to happen we take it for granted whereas vinegar vinegar is transcending the natural process it doesn't make sense Hashem can turn things over upside down and that which seems natural will not work out so again that only begs the question and reinforces the question how do I know I can sip this cup of coffee safely how do I know the 15 things that could go wrong won't go wrong why don't I get stuck why aren't I paralyzed and debilitated with fear and anxiety when I have to drink a cup of coffee how is it that I'm able to make the coffee and drink it while being in conversation with another person and I don't even remember I was so mindlessly and so calmly and confidently making and drinking the coffee that I actually made it and drank it and finished it and I don't remember one moment of it because I was so lost in listening or following to the morning news or in conversation with someone else that's the level of confidence and calmness I have that everything's going to go right but where does that come from we just listed 15 things that could go wrong and we just talked about even the natural order which would reinforce and support the fact that it might go right shouldn't because what is nature after all that can be reversed and suspended so why am I so common and confident why don't I ever remember that process why am I why why am I able to sleep at night I should be up the whole night grip by fear that everything's going to go wrong that next morning when I make my cup of coffee but it doesn't happen instead we don't even think about it instead it's second nature instead it happens mindlessly and we don't even remember it say Schwarz because implicitly without articulating it or communicating it without even feeling it consciously but implicitly we are letting go and letting God we're trusting in Hashem I'm trusting in the history of sipping cuffs of coffee I'm trusting in the logic that it will all go right I'm trusting that the things of nature will continue to operate in the natural way and therefore I don't even need to think about it I remain calm and I remain confident I'm not gripped by Panic or fear I'm not debilitated or Paralyzed by what could go wrong because everything reinforces the fact that it's going to go right I let go and I let God is the one who drives the world he made the rules of physics and chemistry K is the one who created the history and the pattern of the cup of coffee going right and just like I can with confidence and calmness and even on mindlessness go through my life and realize I've let go and I let God essentially what he's trying to demonstrate is we let go and let God all over in our life again I don't want to make you neurotic and ruin your day but anyone here take medicine I take medicines every day every time you put a pill in your mouth and swallow how do you know there's no poison how do you know it hasn't become contaminated how do you know it's not going to harm you how do you know the study is not going to come out that says that you just destroyed yourself how do you know how do you know how do you know how do you know you buy food in the store how do you know that it's not contaminated how do you know it's not carrying Corona virus when you walk across the street how do you know you don't have a blind spot and you're not going to get run over when you drive your car how do you know the brakes aren't going to fail how do you know anything in life how do you know anything in life again I hope I didn't just ruin everybody's day and now you're hiding under the bed and that's it how do you know LMI rather what does it mean it means and what we're demonstrating is that essentially in so many areas and components of Our Lives we are already living this aspiration in so much if not majority of the overwhelming majority of our lives our behaviors our actions our patterns our rituals we are already living the life that says I'm calm and I'm confident I don't give a second thought I don't worry I don't panic I'm not gripped or debilitated by fear or worry but I let go and I let God you know why because on the whole people who take medicine don't find it contaminated and poison and don't die and statistically speaking I'm fairly safe therefore I choose not to think about it beyond that but really if you go to the layer beyond that what you're saying is the reason I'm not worried is because I'm Letting Go and I'm letting God there's a spark of godliness in everything in everything there's a Harmony and a peace and a surrending to the universe I make informed and Intelligent Decisions and I do my best with them and so if if I designate time this is what schz is saying listen carefully if I designate time every day how often as you can if I designate time to stop and to sit and to think these thoughts I have a nugget I have already a a precedent of being able to live this way way I don't need to create it yes may in something from nothing I already have it in my life all I need to do is expand upon it all I need to do is apply it in other areas and in other place it is the most liberating thing in the world instead of looking at others and being envious of what they have and Desiring it instead of being angry and losing your cool instead of being arrogant and thinking you're in charge and you're in control instead of feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders let go and let God now I don't mean to suggest or say that because it's easy I would be lying to you if I didn't tell you that Y and I are concerned and that we don't lie awake at night and ask ourselves what will be how will we pull off this wedding how will we get to where we need to go how will we quarantine effectively who from our family can be there safely what will be what will be you're not human if those thoughts don't come to you though I think we can control them and if we don't have time to talk about this today we'll pick up with it a mem next week we should never relinquish or forfeit our capacity to control our thoughts don't say I can't we we can we choose not to but we also can choose to but I'd be lying to you if I didn't tell you those thoughts come to us that we don't struggle with them of course we do and that's where our Shum and our support group come in and that's where the mindfulness comes in and that's where the thoughtfulness comes in and that's where the Consciousness comes in and that's we're designating that time to stop and to create Partnerships andas in amuna to create aab of amuna to create socities of amuna that reinforce and that help us and support us to stop when those thoughts come and say what are you doing planned X Y and Z you've taken precaution a b and c we're doing the best and everything that we can and what's what's the Panic or fear going to do it's liberating when you oh yeah you know what you're right I forgot I believe in him I forgot I teach about that and made a whole career out of that and got and that and work on that for my whole life oh yeah I forgot that I teach that that's right I also should live that so okay we're going to Institute A and C family lockdown no kids are going to Camp let's stay safe till we can get to New York quarantine in okay we're doing everything we can we're doing it right and now that we've chosen now that we've strategized that's it smile let go feel B take a weight off your shoulders liberate yourself be a million pounds lighter because there's a you're right if it were random en chance and you just wonder how the wheel the rouette wheel is going to land and will it land on you then you have every reason not to sleep but if you remember if you remember that the house is in charge of the of the rooll of that wheel and that he chooses who it lands on and if it lands on you it's for the best and you'll get through it and there's a way out and it's meant to be then you're liberated let go and let God you're a million pounds louder lighter and you're a million times happier and you're not robbed of that Serenity the peace the health and all the other good things I have seen several people start to go gray in four months from Corona virus me it was too late I can't blame Corona virus but I have seen people start to grow gray in three and four months the worry the Panic the anxiety all natural and understandable it is literally taking it toll on us and I believe that for years to come we will look back and measure and measure the negative impact of this time I think there are people who will have PTSD when they wake up and realize I didn't even go to the funeral of a loved one I didn't sit a proper Shiva I didn't have the celebration that I hoped and dreamt of how I people who lost someone overnight with no warning didn't get to say goodbye or visit a hospital or simply people who endured 3 four five months we don't know how long this will go on of uncertainty and of Doubt of panic and it will take its long-term to on us but it doesn't have to it doesn't have to we can control our thoughts we can decide what we allow in we can reframe and recalibrate and reorient our attitude and our Paradigm we can lean in and trust in him and feel his love and his support and his guiding hand that doesn't mean to act irresponsibly of course we have a mandate and a mission we have a responsibility to be careful and cautious in all that we do but it doesn't have to have all that negative impact on us and so we're already a little bit over time we'll do a few more minutes if you want to hang up we'll lose you but we'll do a couple more minutes because I want to just finish this thought if there weren't a spark within you that gave you the capacity to trust then you could never have a cup of coffee so what we've demonstrated so far is that if we can have enough confidence in our life to drink the cup of coffee we already have the capacity within us to trust so the most suspicious the most cynical the most skeptical the most suspicious Among Us still cross the street still ought to take out food still swallow a pill of medicine still drive a car still do all kinds of things that demonstrate that even the most cynical skeptical doubtful Among Us still have areas of life where we have confidence where we trust where we trust test so the opposite you re rearrange those letters and you get a smack you get a patch if you don't have if you don't have faith if you don't have confidence if you don't have the ability to operate if you don't have the capacity to live you're knocked down you're knocked down so they're opposites those letters can spell trust and confidence those letters can spell getting knocked down and if you don't trust you're neurotic I will never get get on an airplane I don't get in a car I don't get in a train people who have phobias it's a form of a mental illness it's mental illness to have a phobia that's illogical and irrational because you're not capable or confident in anything around you it knocks you down it's a PCH P it's a Smackdown and the opposite is the capacity to trust have faith it's a world of Randomness and light and dark are operating in a mixture those people have phobias aor phobia people are afraid of being in public social settings people who are afraid of public speaking people are afraid of heights people who are afraid of cars and planes and trains people who are afraid of afraid of afraid of that they're robbed of their life that's a fear so what is the opposite of being robbed of life because you're living in grip by fear is having trust and confidence I did my research I'm confident and therefore there's nothing wrong with traveling in a car taking the medicine ordering the takeout even jumping out of a plane I've jumped out of a plane twice it's fantastic it's much less dangerous than driving on I95 in Florida where all you see are fingers on top of a steering wheel and that's all you see it is much less dangerous statistically you do your research you make informed decisions and once you do you can live with confidence you don't have to be gripped by a phobia or fear that robs you of your life literally literally paralyzes you you ever look at a skyscraper and you say am I insane to go into that building what's holding it up it could topple over one strong wind you ever get in an elevator and you say a few strings are holding the elevator up again anyone who's nervous should not be listening to this class it'll make things worse not better but how do you get into an elevator how do you walk into a skyscraper how do you step into car the point is throughout our lives a million times a day a million times a day we are trusting how do you take out step outside your home and not believe there's going to be a sinkhole and you're going to follow the path of korak to Oblivion there are no shortage of things that could go wrong in any given day so how do you get out of bed how do you open your eyes how do you start your day how do you live with calmness or confidence in anything because we make informed decisions and among those informed decisions is to know that there is a Hashem and he runs the the world and let go liberate yourself unburden yourself and find the happiness that we deserve so thank you for joining for our support group it's good to see everybody should live with amuna and then we can live with happiness Holiness and good health see everybody tonight I'm behind the beima wishing you a fantastic fantastic day