Rabbi Chaim Sampson - 5 Levels of Pleasure: Understanding What's Real and What's Counterfeit

evening I hope that you're here and that everybody can hear me if anybody is on the line I just wants to let me know that you can in fact hear me I assume that you can it's not just you could text me or nine one seven five six six two two six one just to make sure that the system is working okay all right now the topic for tonight is five levels of pleasure and how to distinguish between real and counterfeit pleasures now the reality is that we're actually a time now where most of us are are at home you know it's as it's an unusual time period but we're at home and it's an interesting thing that you know I could have memories as a as a young child somebody printed in okay forgive me for the prints there but I think that's it there we go okay all right okay so I have memories as a child coming back home and you may have memories when you remember you will wait on a vacation and you came home and there's a wonderful feeling of I'm coming back home what is that feeling it's a feeling of coming back to yourself in a way to who you really are that that's you know that's what it's that's what it's about and I think that when we're at home now there's a feeling that we have over to time to get in touch with who we really are that's what it's about no and I think we need to ask that question that we're we're at home what are our values what are the things that we really want you know that's really you know something for us to think about and in the context of this class I think that what we have to think about is what are the what are the things that we want are those things that we want are they good for us are they our pleasures are they pleasures that we that we feel will be healthy for us or rather play or are they things that are enticing in the world out there which are we feel that we want we identify them as pleasures but somehow maybe you'll see about it somehow made me really feel they're not really so good for us and so this class is to try to help us come to understands with all of this what is it that really is good for us what is really a real pleasure what I'm that's not good for us what's a little bit of a counterfeit pleasure but that's really what we're coming to deal with in this class I want to just sort of clarify that the first thing that we need to really understand is that there are real pleasures in life and there are counterfeit pleasures and those things often look very similar right now the real pleasure will give you something where it'll be real and you'll make make you feel very good but there's also going to be things that they look very similar but they are counted it just I counterfeit money and it doesn't yield what it promises so imagine the following scenario that you know someone comes and he drops from the front your front doorstep $100,000 imagine that you can't believe it it's a gift here it is so what do you do you go to Tiffany's you buy a couple of watches you still have ninety thousand dollars left you're feeling on top of the world the only problem is you leave Tiffany's and there's a couple of policemen right there waiting for you because when you paid you paid with tear counterfeit money so even though you felt really good the policemen they take you away they slap you in prison so you really are much worse off than when you started you thought and that this would be good for you but the reality is it wasn't it didn't yield when it promised and therefore what happened you ended up not just not getting with the real pleasure worse than you were before right and this is it oh this is the key to life to understand that things out there that glitter and they look like they're real but really they're not real not only they're not real but they're gonna give us and we're gonna end up being worse off than we were in the first place now as we go through the different levels of pleasure we're going to see that forever and pleasure there's a real pleasure and there's a counterfeit pleasure but let's just for a moment stop on this point which is pleasure you know it's a very interesting thing you know what's it got to do with Judaism you know isn't judy's about doing what God once he's doing his will but we're talking here today about pleasure and even that you know it's a Jew you know it's like you know is that I would really supposed to be you know indulging in pleasures that's such a religious thing to do so let's tackle this head-on right so you see if you let's say you would say to somebody who's not familiar with Judaism maybe a Jewish person that's less affiliated to you know more secular and you Satan tell me something what do you think Judaism says is what had God really wants from us what is it what does he really want from us so I think you know if you might get answers like this that I you know I think he wants us to be good he wants us to serve Him he wants us to make the world a better place he wants us to pray to be better people then all those aren't very nice answers and they all have aspects of truth but you know his old way you can say to that person you know what this is this is actually a way to understand it from the Torah point of view you see the the relationship with God to us it's like the relationship of a parent to a child does that make sense and I will say yeah makes sense so you say well you know what if it's true that our relationship to God is like a parent to a child if you can understand what is it that parents bottom-line want for their children then you'll be able to understand what is it that God wants from us does that make sense and I say yeah that makes sense so then you will say you know what tell me what is it if they're a parent what is it that you want for your children or if their child what is it that your parents really bought online work for you and I think they might say yes I want my parent my children to be happy to be healthy in two to two have good things in life but the bottom line what parents want for their children they want their children to be happy that's it yes and all the other things are different aspects of how to be happy that's really what it is so that's it so if we understand that's what parents want for their children so judy's and says that bad is really what the Almighty when Hashem wants the pass he wants us to to really be happy to have all the pleasures in life in the life and it's and it's not just that we you know in the world to come right and that we suffer in this one for the world to come we don't believe in that that's the other religion we believe you get tremendous pleasure in this world swimming so that you'll get even more pleasure in the world to come but our our God once I have tremendous pleasure in this world and that's what we believe right so just like a parent once that they're his or her children God once that for us and it makes sense because if you understand that the Jewish concept of gun is that God's an infinite being and therefore he's lacking nothing there's nothing that you can do for God it's not that if you pray to God in fact we said last week you pray to God and says you P that's me you know there's a little Jake and he doesn't know yet someone told me them great and I'm mighty and I know I'm I'm you know then give me a few holy holy holy to that really feel good know Hashem is an infinite being he's lacking nothing it's not that when we serve God he gets something from it so to speak it could he's an infinite being as that as as the Navi says that the Prophet says Marty table Oh what are you gonna give to the Almighty you're gonna give him something he's perfect so when we serve God it's not because he needs it it's because we need it it's for us it's not for him he does unchanging it's for us it's for us to grow right it's for our pleasure and therefore that's the Jewish concept of God that God created us in this world so if you've asked all the pleasures in life and it makes sense that's why Hashem gave us a Torah because what's the turul it - right Cayenne an instruction manual for living how to get the most pleasure or out of life 248 positive instructions of what to do 365 negative instructions of what to avoid so that you can become the person can be the foolish human being read so you can have the most pleasure out of life that is what your Almighty once for us and that's where again as a parent for our children you see we might want pleasures for our children imagine you what do you want your children wouldn't have good food right you want them to enjoy a little music you want them to maybe go to a little store and play tennis and that's all very nice but as they grow older and let's say 30 40 years old it were even before you want them to settle down to get married to have a job because you know that to accomplish in life because you realize that that's part of what having real pleasure in life is and if you understood there was more pleasures out there you'd want them for your children as well right if your children didn't really you know you know then there is 50 years old and he's not really thinking about getting married you'd be a little disappointed and frustrated you know if he's not really accomplishing like he's a playing tennis the whole time with that without you know but you know you'd feel like you know and yes it's nice but I want you to have a little bit more in life that when you feel sense of accomplishment I want you to feel it's a family I want you to have more so that's our understanding this we have to be very clear and realized this is what the almighty wants for us this sort of Sherwin's for us we as children he wants us to have all the pleasures in the world and he gave us an instruction manual of how to get there now this class is dealing with there five different categories of pleasure and this is something that my teacher rabbi Weinberg or bless his memory he learned he down from a book called the safer you know in this in this book in mentions in the middle of love of God five different levels of pleasure and we didn't try to go through each of these pleasures so we're gonna start with the lowest level pleasure what is the lowest level pleasure no it's level pleasure what do you think yeah what do you think it would be and the answer is physical pleasure physical and material pleasures this is the fifth level pleasure right so we have to start off with what's the jus what is the Jewish attitude to physical pleasure now let's understand it by seeing when it's not so out there in the world there's such a thing as asceticism what's asceticism it's an attitude towards physical pleasure which is really taken on by many of the Eastern religions or other religions which and you know for example and they can end up and the philosophy goes like this if the physic if if the goal in life is to be spiritual and that's really where the pleasure is to be had that's what our life is about then wouldn't it make sense to stay away from the physical eye once spiritual eye stay away from physical right kind of make sense what you would think it does you'll see in a moment that we don't agree with this but therefore you might have those people's whose attitude towards physicalities stay away from it so you become you go onto a mountain and you're fast or you you stay away from physical things have become a priest and you don't have any kind of physical connections and so forth because it's bad right yeah it's bad it's gonna it's gonna take me away it's maybe luring me away from the real pleasures of spirituality in life I stay away from it that's one that's what asceticism now let's take another attitude to physicality which is prevalent in Western society and we're surrounded by this which is listen let's be honest you ever had a nice big burger a nice juicy steak doesn't that taste good to tell me something you you know it does right so one steak is good how about five or ten you know that's gonna be even better right so that is is what we call head right Haden ISM is involvement in physicality physical pleasures you know just have more and more because if one steak is good five or ten let's be honest it's gonna be a car that's fantastic so if you want more pleasure in life and have you had more and more physical pleasure that's just great so what's the Jewish approach what's the Torah approach the Torah approaches we don't believe that the physical world is bad in fact we believe it's good that so much so that the Talmud says that when we get to the next world everybody until 120 the Almighty's gonna ask you what's there a fruit that you could have had that you saw it was on your plate so you saw it and you could have had it and you never had it you didn't try it that Hashem is gonna see it's gonna sit judge you for that you know what I created this beautiful fruit for your pleasure and you didn't try it I wanted you to have that pleasure and you didn't so there's a judgement amazing amazing piece of the Talmud so what we said Cecil what's how do we understand you see the physical world is good but it's there for our pleasure but there's a yeah a very important principle you need to understand in having a physical pleasure and that's the following the follow the following is that physical pleasure or being involved in the physical physicality is only enjoyable when you use it as a means to an end so a person eats food right so that he can have energy right but if he's eating food to indulge it doesn't give the pleasure it's when you have enough food that it gives you energy it'll give you plenty you go to sleep right not because you want to sleep your life away but but you go to sleep so that you re energized for the following day right that then you feel good about your sleep correct once you indulge in what happens you get a stomach ache affray you feel bad you know you don't feel good so this is the point of understand we believe in physical pleasure enjoy it say your blessing on the food I enjoy the physical pleasures that yeah yeah hat right but only to the extent that there are means to something higher there means to an end something more meaningful but when you're using physicalities means to something higher then when you have yours at your dinner you'll enjoy it the minute it starts becoming an end to itself then you lose the pleasure so it's not that we don't believe in having lots of steaks because we don't believe in that kind of enough physical pleasure what we believe is have too much you'll start feeling indulgent you'll start feeling empty and sick to the stomach and it takes it robs you of pleasure so therefore use physical so there from here that the the attitude to physicality is be involved in it enjoy it learn how to appreciate it you know become a connoisseur right enjoy the mistake and Apple and the orange it's so beautiful enjoy it's the succulent orange and all the different foods enjoy it and that's what we say a blessing on it right it's meant to enjoy and say thank God for it right so that's the real pleasure the counterfeit is indulgence as soon as you indulge you lose the pleasure now this is one aspect of physical of physical pleasure what we're saying is if the material pleasures learn to enjoy them and that and don't indulge in them it is another part now as introduction to this second part of the fifth level pleasure which the physical pleasure I want to share a story with you story with you it's gonna help us through the different levels of pleasure which is the following and it's a beautiful story of someone that went into Rabbi Weinberg's office and said to him rabbi Weinberg you know traveling through Israel and he said Tommy is a rabbi I want to tell you something I've been through the whole country north-south-east-west I want to tell you something there's nothing spiritual about this you know nothing holy this country you know I've been everywhere I traveled all around it and you know nothing holy about this land so he's sitting there and rabbi Weinberg asking the following question tell me something on your travels how many Burfoot sticks did you did you see he says how many what he says how many Burfoot sticks did you see he says what's of the first it well my wife says no no I'm asking the questions here you tell me how many / caustics you saw the guy starts getting a little frustrated he's ever heard rabbi how can I tell you how miracle states I saw if you don't tell me what of the lipstick is so rabbi winder looks at those aha tell me something you have a definition of holiness that you know what it is maybe you know you think it's like you know a rainbow peering in the start sky you know God's gonna attack you on the shoulder and angel appears and in front of you is that if that's what you thought it was it's possible right that you know what it was right in front of your nose and you didn't even know her because you didn't have a definition right if you had a definition of holiness then maybe you could tell me that you didn't see it but if you don't have a definition don't know what you're talking about it could be right there and you missed the whole thing so rabbi one bird would use this analogy to say you know what in life important things that we want them that we need right we're often very hazy about right so for example you know if you want to be happy here if you want to have the have a relationship based on love right so what does it mean to be happy if you know people could spend their whole life chasing something they think if they work their way up the corporate ladder and then you know then I'll be happy you know or if I meet the right gal then I'll be happy or if I have the two that you know children then I'll be happy oh by the new house or whatever it is yeah people often can spend many many years are like chasing something that they think than happiness but because they didn't have a definition they wasted in years of their life chasing something that in the end is not even going to give them what they want better define what it is to have happiness to find what it is to have a loving relationship and then you can go and get it but if you don't you can get it get confused with something that Metz may seem like it right that isn't the real thing so therefore we want to start here we're talking about the fifth level of pleasure that we talked about physical material pleasures right and so what we wanted to say is is really bring out how happiness is really kind of this fifth level now really now we talked about this a little bit when we spoke about the prayer class in Iran you know the first prayer class and understanding your relationship with a champ but I think it's such an important principle I want to bring it out again and it fits here in the fifth level of pleasure which is the following you see what is the debt what is it what is the definition of happiness right what does it mean to be happy so you see let's bring it out this way if I offered anybody here you know a thousand dollars for their eyes right would you take it and you give me your eyes I'd give you that no takers a hundred thousand a million a million dollars a lot of money you know yogi you give me your eyes you walk away a millionaire No ten million 100 million rabbi it doesn't matter how much money you give me I'm not giving you my eyes right okay now what you know now imagine I met you and I was all very wealthy fella right in many ways but I shine you'll see by the end of this little piece I am but no but if I came to you I say you know what I like you you're a friend of mine I appreciate you again I pick up my attache case that here's a given a gift to you you open up $100 bills it's a million dollars I say it's yours a gift from me to you because I like you so much and it's really a sincere gift how would you feel you know how you'd feel you'd feel like a million dollars when you do a jig down street you'd be so happy but if I say to you friend you have eyes how do you feel you look at me and think I'm crazy say the same miserable person as I was before you are before you ask me the question but I come back saying listen you told me the your eyes are worth more to you than any money so if your eyes are worth more to you than any money right if you do it cheap down the street for the million dollars they're getting you shouldn't you be doing a jig down the street because you have eyes it's worth more to you than any money more than a million more than ten million more than any money say right good question rabbi so what's the answer the answer is yeah we've got used to come eyes that's it we take how eyes for granted see and that is the problem that we have with being happy so if you get used to your eyes you can get used to anything right you get a new car you get a new Lamborghini that you get for your birthday you get whatever it is you know come back in a few months in a year you'll be used to that as well because you've gotten used to your eyes you're getting used to the new house then you baby the new wife the new whatever it is you get used to it so what's the trick right see the trick is to learn to appreciate what you have not to take it for granted and that's why in Judaism we say a hundred blessings a day so that we can exercise that muscle right of appreciating what we have and this is appreciating the physical things that we have if you just appreciate all the physical things that you have and you have eyes you have is you have a heart you have hands you happy you know you have more than 50 things that worth more to you than any money right so that's amazing so therefore each one of us has to appreciate we're a walking multi-billionaire even if we don't have a penny to our name we're all rich right now if we can do that right and appreciate what we have we would be so happy but it's just hard work because it's so much easier to go through life and focus on everything you don't have see what's the definition of happiness happiness is the pleasure that you have when you appreciate what you truly have what's misery I totally have suitable focus on everything that you don't have focus on everything that goes wrong today this guy it was insensitive and this guy didn't do this and I and I woke up and I didn't I just didn't feel good and everything this you focus on what you don't have and what went wrong guarantee you you'll be that's the definition of misery right focus on the pleasure focus on you do have right focus on all the things that you do have you'll do your skip through life you'll be ecstatic right it's just hard work we've got to exercise that muscle so this is this is just physical pleasure see if you if you appreciate all these physical things that's right then that within it will give you a feeling of happiness so this is the first level you see the physical and material pleasures are enjoy the physicality yeah don't indulge in it but use it for a higher purpose and the counterfeit of that is to indulge in physical things you think it's going to be played give you pledge but it's not gonna be indulge and you're working full stick you get a stomach ache right a and B we're happiness material pleasure gives you the feeling of happiness and the energy right if you've appreciate all the things that your hand then you feel happy what's the counterfeit of this part of the fifth level is that it's you know if I if I amass wealth right I say there's nothing wrong with being wealthy you can do a lot of good things with money but if you're looking that that's what's gonna make you happy it's that feeling I want more you'll just get really I want more and more and more yeah it's not because you'll get them more and if you haven't learned how to appreciate what you have then you still won't be happy right so that's the illusion that by amassing material and physical things and nice things somehow I'll magically become happy unfortunately many people have many many nice things out there and they are miserable because they never learned how to appreciate what they have so this is the fifth level pleasure fethullah pleasure is appreciating physical material things not indulging and not am a sick bastard okay so that's now let's go on to the fourth level of pleasure right now what's the fourth level of pleasure what you have to understand see each of these different levels of pleasure are not each each one is is a categorically different type of pleasure it's something much greater than the the level before in fact they're not interchangeable meaning there's no amount of fifth level physical pleasure that will give you the pleasures of the next level so what would be the next level that's physical so what's the next level you think emotional right then but but it really this level of pleasure is really what all the songs are about this is what people sing about it's something you know people sing about being happy maybe but much more out there they're singing about the fourth level of pleasure which is the pleasure of love okay so again we want to have a definition a clear definition because we understand that you know what if when you are you know there's a thing out there called infatuation right now I don't know if you know you've ever felt that you're aware of that feeling but it's what's in all the movies right a feeling more effectuation resembles the feeling of being in love right so you know we we often feel that when you know we excuse me a person needs know the difference between the two because a person for example you can see know once if you get married because you love the person not because you're infatuated so what's the difference what's the difference so let's try to understand you see what is love so let's let me imagine the following scenario I think you would ask would have asked my mother alone but you say like you know tell me something about your son yeah tell me what what you know what what he's like so you can admit could have imagined her saying you know what you know my son he's warm and he's caring and he's responsible and he's intelligent and he's I just love him right now why why is she saying at the end and I just love it because right when you see the virtues of a human being and you identified the person with his or her virtues that's when you feel a sense of love he is so caring he is so giving he is so warm and responsible when you feel when you see the virtues and you say that's who he or she is then you feel a sense of love what's hate hate is the opposite right you know that guy he thinks he's God's gift to mankind he thinks he owns the place he's so arrogant and egotistical I can't stand him what does that mean see his false crying identify with him his with his fault and you hate him that's how to hate someone now let's go back to infatuation what is infatuations right what is it that you you feel when you in fact you had to imagine again and at the scenario you know a gal comes back after meeting a guy and she said I met the guy of my dreams you know he's so incredible he's so giving and kind and caring and he uh he's perfect right so that seems a little bit like love why because we said love was focusing on the virtues and here she's seen someone and she's focusing on what she thinks are virtues so why isn't that luck so the difference is like this you see if you think a person is perfect it's not real you just met the guy you don't even know the guy right so therefore it's not real it's not you're really sealing virtues you want to believe that those are the virtues that he or she has right and therefore it's not real so how do you know the difference if you think he's he or she is perfect you're infatuated because you know you know you're not seeing the real thing you're blind to the reality right of who he or she is and unfortunately in the world out there where people can get married and they're infatuated in each other what happens is a year two years down the line and the infatuation fades they see see who the person really is I didn't want this friend this is not who I was I thought I married but really you never knew that in the first place you were just infatuated you see that we you know there's a saying out there that love is blind but we don't believe that we say infatuation is blind if you think you met the perfect girl run a million miles because there's no such thing as anyone who's perfect you're infatuated to not it laughs so you see the thing is like this if you say you know to someone who loves you the most most people will say you know what a lousy my parents you know who loves us the most yeah her parents many a thousand who loves us the most who gives you know who gives us the most criticism my parents have made so how does that work you love your children the most means that according to what we said that you're seeing their virtues right so therefore why what does it mean if I'm giving them criticism means I'm focusing on their faults so this is the point and this is the crucial point of understanding how to love someone is that when you love someone you know that like the Rambam says according to the knowledge is the love right when you know someone you see the good and the bad together right so so but what's the difference right you know you see the love you see the good excuse me and the bad but you identify the person with his or her virtues not with his phones so for example if you go back to my mother and say that was really nice what she said when you said about your son right but isn't it true that your son is really also a hypochondriac megalomaniac kleptomaniac isn't that was some true outside of all the beautiful virtues and she'll say well you know one happens to be that he does have those negative qualities a little bit but then she'll say but it's not really his fault he really grew up that way it was really my fault he's struggling against it you see when you love someone you see the faults but you don't say that's who they are you understand this is something which is not it's not the essence of who they are right it's something that they're struggling we all have faults right and we are struggling with them now imagine the fondling such scenario you know and so you see a person and he's walking down the street you know and you notice that doesn't have an arm right now I think that when we see people like that and I know people like that who wonderful wonderful people right at the same time I think we get a little bit of a jolt right you know you see a person who's walking and he's got one leg you know how is not walking but he's whatever in moving and he has one leg you know it hurts us right it hurts us because we feel badly right now I imagine if we if I would be walking down the street with you and we see such a person and I would say to you don't you hate that person because he has one leg I see the person person taking rabbi Samson in oh I can't believe I'm hearing that from you how can you hate someone because they have one leg you know yeah you know they can't help it there this is you know it's just a problem that they have don't hate someone because they've got a problem so I asked you my friends a person walks down the street with a big ego goes through life with a big ego what's worse to go through life with a big ego or to be a very humble person and have one leg or one arm right I'm telling you now much worse to go through life you should have all the blessings about you should but to go through life with a big ego you're gonna have problems with your your spouse with your boss with your children you're gonna promise being happy you're gonna have problems with learning from people a big ego is a terrible thing to go through life with a much bigger problem than what we just described so imagine if we're walking down the street we see somebody weather you know and we're walking down the street see see oh this guy's got a big ego and I say I hate her because he's got a big ego you say that's even worse than hating someone who doesn't have a hand or doesn't have whatever it is why because it's a bigger problem right don't hate people because of their false right feel bad for them feel compassion I don't be judgmental yeah the essence of how to get this feeling of alva of love is to realize to see that if this person has beautiful virtues and he's struggling against his or her faults I remember one time love's an issue but many years ago and there was a guy that I you know I remember every time we walk in the room and you'd feel that little feeling of you know I I don't you know I don't you know I feel I don't really like this guy you know you feel that feeling so I remember you know one time came to me this person that I had that feeling and it was 1l just before I should show him he came like he said hime I want to ask you for advice than a white came to me at the time but he did and he said you know I've been struggling with you know I had this issue and I had a big ego and I I don't know what to do about it and I'm struggling with it and I thought you'd give me some advice I'm trying to do two before Rosh Hashanah how you know what do you think I can do and I want to tell you I was I was humbled huh because I had looked at this guy this is who he is he is egocentric that's the essence of who he is and now I saw how much he was trapped in it it wasn't whom years he's held back by her friend so therefore right it's not the essence then I started I saw him after that as a soul as a neshama as a as a person who's in virtuous and a wonderful person but just struggling with he has his faults I have mine the midst for our half dollar Erica Miller to love your neighbor as yourself is to love even obnoxious people right because everybody has faults affray with just different come in different shapes and sizes and different stripes and colors right you have yours donator see the beautiful virtues that he has to understand he has his Pecola you have yours so this is you the third the second this is the the so the pleasure of fifth or fourth level is a drug lab what's the definition of love the definite love is the pleasure you feel will identify a person with his or her virtues and the counterfeit is infatuation infatuation is you think that you're you're in love you feel but you actually don't see the person's virtues clearly it's just an illusion because you kind of wanna believe it right but you don't really know the person if you know them you see the good and the bad together that's when you really love someone as long as you identify them with a good and not with the bad if you hate them if you identify dislike them even it's because you are looking at the bad and seeing that's the essence of who they are on some level so stop judging people from and see the beauty in people and realize that that you know we all have our faults so that's the third level second excuse me fourth a pleasure now what we're going to do before we get into the third level pleasure we have to really basically understand that the following piece right which is that in order to really see to get to the higher level pleasures and that this really sorts out as we say the men from the boys the women from the girls no discrimination here which is that you've got to understand the following important piece of wisdom if you really want to even get into what we call the heavier pleasures of life great so I want to share this at this point you see I my teacher and I while I used to ask it the following way and see if you ask someone is the opposite of pain what are they gonna say or what are you gonna say the opposite of pain is pleasure now my teacher rabbi Weinberg needs to say to say the opposite of pain is pleasure is the definition of a decadence now why so why would that be right because you know if you if you think the opposite of pain is pleasure right so my one pleasure I've got to stay away from pain because they're opposites so what is the feeling of no pain right the feeling of no pain is really comfort it's comfort so if you really think the opposite of pain is pleasure then I want to stay away from pain what I've been looking for in life which i think is going to give me pleasure is comfort now what's the ultimate comfort what does that mean I'm looking for in life so imagine the following scenario you're lying on a beach it's a beautiful day right the Sun is is is is coming down you're lying there and you know you're so comfortable and it's a really comfortable experience you have a little nice glass by the side you've got your little Pina Colada there it's really I but but you're lying there you're not moving a muscle you're not even blinking your eyes yeah you're just so comfortable you're just gonna be careful you don't fall asleep and miss the whole experience right you're doing nothing right that's the ultimate pleasure that if you identify the boxer or pain is pleasure that's what you're gonna be looking for now Judaism says actually they're total opposites right but if you want pleasure pain is the price you pay for pleasure as it says in cricket our vote the from sarah agra according to the effort is the reward but it's it's it's a very important principle in taking pleasure in love right that according to the effort that you put in is the pleasure you'll get out right and and we know this to be true so for example I don't know you know you play sport right you play tennis you know imagine we play tennis you love to play tennis now won't we enjoy more I really tough game and it's it's a it's a five-set game two sets for tiebreaker in the fifths in the fifth set and it's so close it was such a hard game so much but in the end you won eight you know 24 22 in the fifth tiebreaker and it knew one game or would you prefer a game where it was like you know the guy gets on the pitch pitch is that right you don't get it becoming an American the court excuse me Wimbledon I should know get on the court and it's 6-love 6-love 6-love excuse me 6-0 6-0 6-0 right so so you know and you wonder there was no game that was too easy witches have greater pleasure the easy one on the hard one course the hard one right in life you know personal want to climb a mountain right there's something about it it's hard imagine it was a little a little mountain yeah it's a six-foot mountain there's no point in that you know it convince you it's a mountain doesn't give you the pleasure if you take your helicopter to the top of the mountain and you flew up there doesn't give you the pleasure according to in life you understand that the more effort the more effort you put in the more pleasure you'll get out of life it's your relationships it's your work you some sense is that is that that's true for all of life the more effort you put in the more you'll get out and that's crucial now we have to understand that before we get into the fifth the third level pleasure which will [Music] noise it sounds like it's coming from your Misha lion but okay but we've got to understand that bones because we're looking in life for comfort and we're mistaking that as pleasure we're going to lose we're going to go through life and basically choose not to put not will not get the tremendous pleasures that we can get so I guess I'll have to pick up from here next time reality is that we're out of time anyway so next time we'll have to start got to do the top three levels of pleasure but if you understand physical pleasure the pleasures of love it's physical pleasure and it's love focus on people's nests and blow them understand them and understand their thoughts is not their essence and number three is understanding real pleasures come from pretty tremendous effort into life you're gonna jump out of the day thank you for listening next time 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