Rav Yitzchak Breitowitz: How to Achieve Liberation from Your Inner Mitzraim

[Music] okay everybody uh thank you coming and uh we're still uh basking in the new Ian facility here and uh Rabbi post Ian should have much much and bra in what they're doing so I'm a major major addition to the neighborhood in Ras and tonight Sher is dedicated uh again praying for the victory of our soldiers and all the fronts of the war for the lasting Unity of the people of Israel for all of those whose Health has been affected by the war for the safe return of all of the hostages and shom and in memory of Mendel mother of DNA Prince and orle Duman and her yard side is next Monday uh hey hey shat is starting its weekday minion morning minion this Thursday 745 a.m. at 52 a that's that's here big delicious breakfast will be served afterwards in fact every day a breakfast will be made available as well as learning opportunities if you are interested just show up uh you don't have to be pre-approved in any way uh that's Thursday morning January 30 uh and finally there will be a malava Mala here uh Mo shabas February 1st with Rabbi yam Glazer uh details will be on the ion website it is 8:30 p.m. Mo shabas February 1st so once again uh so many activities are are going on again needless to say I don't want to repeat uh the stuff we talked about last week but obviously um as the are gradually being released and hopefully in good health uh we have a lot of mixed feelings uh of course all we have is a great great joy that Yen are coming home to their families after being gone for more than a year after undergoing suffering both they suffered their families suffered uh on the other hand we also have much much fear and trepidation over the cost that we paid for this in terms of the terrorists and uh should be is from any type of pigua any type of Terror any type of damage uh that these terrorists go they obviously have noash so to speak uh the assumption is not that they're a benign segment they are a dangerous segment but again if with no one can hurt us and therefore we we pray to a that should be very safe I'm not going to address the aspects I've addressed that in other Shor that you can uh get uh but once again we're still in the middle of the situation so it's something that that comes to mind a lot uh this is the great par of The Exodus of Egypt an event that is so important that we are M to remember it not only once a year during the Seder but every single day of the year morning and night we p in twice a day we are to remember and this means to verbalize it not just think about it the notion of taking us out of when we say in the shma of the evening the third par of of which is not really part of kma the verse I am the Lord your God who took you out of him to be for you a God so even if you look in the art scroll sitter there'll be a little note there that says a person should have intention to fulfill the the Torah Commandment that is called to Remember The Exodus of Egypt now I had mentioned two weeks ago the very important statement in the the which is really from aishna in every person must regard themselves as if they themselves were taken out of MIT I don't just thankes because of what happened in the past but I am to be margish to feel as if I myself was taken out of M now granted granted Sal the gra brisker does explain that this is not the daily Mitzvah the daily Mitzvah is called I remember what the ab did in the past there's a special that I have to feel as if I myself was taken out meaning this is not a daily obligation that's how understands that's how understands the distinction between the daily Mitzvah of Z and the annual Mitzvah of one of the differences is that the daily Mitzvah is remembering what happened in the past the annual Mitzvah is to be margish to feel as if I myself was taking but whether it's a daily thing or an annual thing there is a special mus a special conception by that I have to feel that I myself was taken out of MIT so again to review a little bit I had raised a question two weeks ago in what sense is that true I understand the idea that I'm grateful for what God did in the past because had he not redeemed my forefathers perhaps I wouldn't be here we would we would have fit the 50th level of impurity we would have been goners so I'm grateful for what he did for them because without them I wouldn't be here I understand but that's not the same thing is saying it's as if I myself was taken out of Egypt I was never in Egypt I was never a slave in Egypt so in what way is it true so I gave a few answers two weeks ago but I I I want to go back to the balatas yod the alter Reby the Ali says that the word MIT has a double meaning MIT is the nation of Egypt that enslaved claw Israel from which Hashem took us out with the maros with the plagues with the Miracles and the like and that didn't happen to me that happened to my ancestors and yes I benefit from what was done to my ancestors but that didn't happen to me it's not possible to say I have to regard myself as if I was taken out of MIM but the alter rebbi says MIT has a secondary meaning MIT does not just mean Egypt but it comes from the term boundary constriction blockage right says from the narrow confining limits I call out to God like a person is trapped I'm trapped the walls are coming in on me I have no place to move I call out to Hashem from a desperate constricting place and God should answer me with expansiveness back the moral says that is the idea that in the B mikdash one of the Miracles of the basa mikdash was when we were standing we were so crowded like the light rail here right you're crowded crowded sa and yet when it was time to bow down everybody had plenty room plenty of room tremendous miracle and the morale says that was a tangible expression of crying out to God from the narrow confines and Hashem answers you with expansiveness so MIT refers to all of the limitations in life that hold us back every person has a MIT egotism selfishness anger laziness self-loathing depression despair arrogance whatever it is resentment that's a MIT because it's a matar it's a boundary it's a constriction it's a limitation so says the bat when a kades took the yiden took the juice out of MIT he put into the World a spiritual kak a spiritual power in which every person can latch on to the spiritual power ofat to become liberated from the mits that enslaved them and that is the meaning of each person must regard himself as if he was taken out of mitzraim that doesn't mean according to the bat at least each person must believe make believe that he was in Egypt but each person must identify his mits and when you identify your mits you connect to the of to be able to be liberated it's a very very powerful thoughts you know there are many different how God is on the market and I'm talking now about from non Orthodox movements even there'll be the Civil Rights ha there'll be the feminist ha there probably is even a transgender ha my guess is it's probably out there somewhere and on one level we look at these things I me even even legitimate movements that's Civil Right civil rights is a legitimate movement uh but we think well you know what are you taking PES p is about what are you sttipping in these political and social movements and that is true but you know there is a kernel of Truth in using the Seder as a springboard for other types of human Liberation I'm I'm not referring to perversions against the Torah I don't mean that but generally to understand that yasim is not just a historical event but Yas is a spiritual power in the world to be liberated from our inner mums what that actually means is that in the hagada as we go through it there are two narratives that are taking place simultaneously narrative number one which I would say is indeed the primary narrative is what we call that is the common denominator narrative that the Jewish people were in Egypt and God redeemed Us From Slavery and we became God's servants slaves right he took us out of one slavery and we become his slaves and that is the great historical background of am Israel that together with Matan Torah made us a nation and lovingly parents communicates that to child generation after generation that's level one that's theat that's the basic understanding why we have to get together every year and talk about how we became a nation and what are the implications of becoming God's nation that I would call the public story that is the public story of the hagada the public story of The Exodus but side by side with the public story is a more private idiosyncratic narrative maybe it's to be shared with others with family and maybe it's not to be shared Maybe maybe it's only in your heart and in your mind in which you try to identify your inner mums your inner demons the things that constrict you the things that limit you the things that prevent you from moving forward and looking at the story ofas MIT as a mechanism by which one can become liberated from the mits that are with in now it's true that much of what I'm talking about is to the Seder of P but the commentaries tell us that in the weeks of the Torah reading when we read the these paros about the Exodus the light of pesak is shining in these weeks and as a result the types of things that we achieve during PES we can also achieve during these weeks in the language of the makal uh the light of PES is here bpin means in a small face in a microcosm and therefore much of the Liberation that we have of Pak is a Liberation that we achiev during these weeks right the ALB used to say that people have a saying apparently was a saying even in Russia uh you have to live with the times I got to live with the usually people say don't be oldfashioned live with the times Del Reby said yeah a Jew has to live with the times that means the paral of the week is always telling you what your lesson is uh for that particular week so a yid a Jew lives with the times so there is this double narrative so in some ways I I I can't get as incensed as maybe I should get when you have these hag themes that deviate from because in a sense uh it's connected to the theme that MIM is a much broader broader idea than just the Exodus from EG now obviously I'm not endorsing things that are against the Torah that that obviously is not true but that's why for example you know uh people who have grandparents or relatives who are Holocaust Survivors so often at the Seder in many of theorm they will recount the story of their Liberation or the like and uh that's that's not I'm suggesting that is not an interruption of the ha that is part and parcel of what Yas MIT is about so in this connection I want to explore another passage in the hag which is really taken from the Mish it's a mishna in the 10th par and that is r g r Gamel used to say anyone that does not explain the three symbols of pesak has not fulfilled his obligation and the three symbols are P the eating of the pas sacrifice matah the eating of the matah and the eating of the mar meaning it's not enough to eat the carbon PES when you had a temple it's not enough to eat the matah it's not enough to eat the morar rather the significance of those foods have to be explained uh let me just point out a little observation which maybe I should repeat as we get closer to pesak the points out that this paragraph is the most important paragraph in the whole because what it says is if you didn't say explain you're not y your Mitzvah now what Mitzvah aren't you y it doesn't mean you're not those are eating Mitzvah as long as I eat my matah I'm y matah but it means you haven't been y even though you said a long magget you haven't been yot the Mitzvah of recounting The Exodus what Mitzvah haven't you the mitah Now problem is that the r paragraph is situated towards the very end of maget which is shortly before the meal so often I'm going to say women although maybe I'm being sexist that way but whoever is going to bring out the food gets up goes into the kitchen and starts preparing for the meal which means the very part of the hagada that they might be missing is the ran gel paragraph that's very bad you haven't been y your Mitzvah so it's very very important that if somebody whether it's man or woman I don't want to be sexist whoever is getting up to getting the food they should not leave until they can go ahead until they receive side ahead of time the Rin gam paragraph before they before they get up uh and of course like every part of the hagada it's important that you understand it so if uh if you don't if you understand the English and not the Hebrew then say it in English uh because if you say it in Hebrew and you don't you don't know what the Hebrew words mean and you don't look at it translation that's also intellect so that's a an observation from the that people should be careful to be sure to say the RAB G paragraph of P now the mishna proceeds and this is in the ha but the hag got it from the mishna the mishna is older than the hag per se uh the mishna the hag goes on and explain that PES the English is very good pesak means Passover it refers to God passing over the houses of the Jews that had the blood on the doorways and only killing the firstborn of Egypt so with the carbon peasant reminds us of God's mercy in sparing the Jewish people and in punishing the Egyptians okay now with Mata matah however is a very very interesting Mitzvah because the reason the Tyra gives for eating matah is a difficult reason for a lot of uh a lot of factors what ises the Tyra say and this is picked up in the ha we didn't have time to let our dough rise meaning normally you make a dough you let it rise and then you bake it we did not have time to let our dough rise because we had to leave that second and therefore we had to bake the dough before it had risen that's mat and therefore to commemorate the is the hurriedness by which we left Egypt we have to eat matah every year to commemorate how rapidly we had to leave Egypt now what does it mean we didn't have time to let our dough rise it only takes 18 minutes I mean the h definition is if water is mixed with flour and you leave it alone for 18 minutes it'sit at most the the most liberal opinion for K is 24 minutes so 18 and 24 minutes so what do you mean we didn't have time so some understand it that pyro was so anxious to get us out of there after the plague of the first porn that he said get out get out get out get out leave others the Aral famously says that it wasn't parro that was not giving us time it was Hashem that was not giving us time because remember that we were we should have been in MIM for 400 years and Hashem took us out after 210 years 190 years early and the reason is after the 210 years we were on the 49th level of impurity there's only 50 levels when you hit Level 50 you're irredeemable Rock Bottom we don't even understand this had they stayed even another minute in mitam another minute another second they would have hit Level 50 Hashem says get out now and if that means you got to bake your dough before it's risen then do so so that's Aus is the urge of the hurriedness is that coming from parro or is the coming from now again let me let me remind you as it were four fifths of the Jewish people died during the plague of Darkness so when we talk about they were in the 49th level of impurity we are talking about the 20% that survived that they were on the 49th level of impurity so be this it may the Tyra and ultimately the hag and the mishna state that the reason for matah is we didn't have time to let our dough rise and therefore to remember the rapidity by which we had to leave Egypt we eat matah every year now just philosop Ally one might ask the question why is that so important meaning I understand that it's important to know that God took us out of Egypt but why is the idea of of rapidity so significant and a whole Mitzvah was given to us to remember the by which we left MIT you know frankly like who cares let's assume I wouldn't remember the but I remember took me out of why is so important here so again uh the simple explanation is that this highlights hashem's Mercy that Hashem will not allow the Jewish people to disappear physically or spiritually that Hashem could have said Hey listen I told Abraham they're going to be there 400 years if they happen to disappear after uh 210 years that's not my business that's their problem they shouldn't have become Idol worshippers or whatever it is and yet will not let is die it's get is no matter how bad we get and they'll be punishments and they'll be Etc Hashem is going to be there to ensure that we survive that's the lesson of he's not going to let am Israel be destroyed that's an important lesson again in terms of what happens to individuals things happen there are holocausts there's gallot there's hban Jews sometimes die I mean everyone dies eventually but they suffer we don't know exactly why sometimes we we have some inkling why but the one thing to remember is that I'm Israel will never can never be destroyed and the reminds us of that idea but here is the problem if the reason for matah is we got a certain problem and that ises two weeks before p b Isel were were commanded that when they bring the Corbin pesak on the 14th of Nissan and they eat the Corbin PES that night in other words the night before The Exodus they have a to eat it with matah and bitter herbs now the question becomes how can you say that the reason for eating matah is to commemorate the hurriedness by which we left MIM if we were commanded to eat matah before we even left MRA the issue of the baking of the bread was the next morning we ate matah the night before when we ate matah the night before what was the reason why we were eating mat right if I were to ask right I'm meeting matah with my son my wife the first seder and my son asks me you know Manana so to speak says why are we eating matah I'm not going to be able to say oh because we had to leave mitam in such a rush we didn't have time to have our doise that didn't happen yet and yet the Jews were commanded to eat mat so that's question number one how can I connect mat to the if there was a mitv mat before there was a and of course remember according to right that's but obviously that whole reason didn't apply yet either so that's question number one but but but there's a question number two which is actually more of a problem you see question number one I could actually answer the following it's not impossible that gives mitos for reasons that will not become apparent until a later time which means the first night they ate MAA they didn't know the reason but by the next morning they understand the reason and that's going to be the reason forever meaning it's not intrinsically difficult to say okay they were given a Mitzvah because of a certain reason that didn't materialize until later okay so that would be the answer to that but there's a real problem here and that is when God commanded us two weeks before PES to eat matah he also commanded us not to have Kates Thou shalt not eat during the seven days of PES now if that's the case the reason itself no longer makes sense you're telling me they didn't have time to let their dough rise because they were kicked out what does that mean had they been given time they would have let their dough rise but wait a minute they couldn't let their D rise because they were commanded not to have a e see this is a different question this is not just asking oh the Mitzvah of matah didn't have that reason yet that's a question but that's not such a b difficult question because mitzvot could be given in advance of their reason but the problem is since they were not allowed to eatates the whole reason doesn't make sense meaning they couldn't allow their dough to rise and if that's the case there is no significance in because when I look at the matah I'm not thinking about the haste by which we left inim because even if we had all the time in the world we had to bake it as matah so that's a second question right very very difficult a third idea is that matah is there's actually another reason that's given for matah and that other reason that's given for matah is matah is called only only means the bread of Affliction matah as the the ezzra explains was the bread that the Egyptians gave to Slaves because matah stays in your stomach a long time and even a little matah as most of us know can give you a sense of fullness sometimes uncomfortable fullness and therefore the Ezra writes the Ezra was also a world traveler he writes when he came to India he saw the maharaji were feeding their slaves unleavened bread and therefore matah is both a commemoration of the of gah the the rapidity of redemption but it's also a remembrance of slavery now these two reasons are actually actually highlighted in the hag itself at the beginning of the Seder when we begin the the magit we recite a paragraph in Aramaic this is the bread of Affliction the bread of poverty the bread of suffering which our forefathers ate in Egypt so when we point to the matah at the beginning of the Sater we are remembering the matah of slavery toward the end of the magit when we quote the Rin Gamel paragraph We mention that our do didn't have time to rise so matah is a dual symbol matah is a symbol of slavery matah is a symbol of Freedom now that would explain why at the first Sader they ate mats in other words so now I have an answer to my son if my son asks me or you know would have asked me at the first Sader why are you eating matah I wouldn't have been able to give the reason because we didn't have time to let our dough rise that didn't happen yet but I could still say that God is commanding us on the night of our freedom to always remember our slavery other words that would answer that question but the other question is still is still a very very difficult question and that is the reason no longer applies because if we weren't allow if we if we already were commanded right do you understand the question we already were Comm demanded not to eatates two weeks before then by the time we leave MIT we don't have time I'm sorry we don't have opportunity to make so even if we had the time we couldn't do it so how can you say we didn't make K because we didn't have time to let our door rise we weren't allowed to have so this is actually a fascinating question that that the re the commentaries on the gorah itself ask and I I don't want to get overly overly technical in this area I'll just share with you of the ran re the ran says a very interesting thing the ran shows from various Biblical verses that although they already were commanded to eat matah and not have not eat or have but there was a difference in the prohibition in MIT that first year and every other year the Ron wants to show that although there was a to eat matah uh but the iser ofes that first year was only day one not seven days and even on day one you were allowed to own even though you weren't allowed to eat it so the Ran's argument is yes uh the next morning when they were baking their bread they couldn't have made itates to eat but they could have made itates to be eaten a later date uh the next day even the second day because there was no eer yet of possessing kit till the second year so when we say that matah reminds us they didn't have time to to allow their dough to rise implying that they could have had their dough rise that is referring to the Kates they could have baked in in order to eat the other days of PES and since they were not able to let that door rise so for further years we're not allowed to have anyes for that time as a okay this is the the R's answer but but the main thing I I wanted to share with you is to go back to the idea that we have these three symbols the carbon pesak the eating of the matah which is the rapidity the hurriedness and then of course we have the marar which is to commemorate the bitterness of slavery now if we go back to the batan idea that mitzraim is not just about the Exodus of Egypt but it refers to the inner mams that we face it may stand to reason that the symbolism of P are not just commemorative points about the Exodus from Egypt but these are points that are relevant to our own inner struggle against our own Ms I'm going to go in reverse order instead of p i will start with Mor mat P I'll explain why I'm going in in reverse order how does one achieve Liberation from their inner mums so let's first look at morar morar is remembering the bitterness of slavery the spiritual illusion here is that the first step to being liberated from your mits is to be honest and recognizing that you have M RS recognize that you're a slave to whatever it is a slave to anger St a slave to laziness a slave to resentments because if you simply if we simply sweep these things under the rug and we don't acknowledge that we have constrictions we have limitations we can never become free of them the first step towards achieving a spiritual Liberation is to be honest to yourself in acknowledging a spiritual slavery of one level or the other a slave cannot be free until he admits to himself that he's a slave I've told the story before but I I'll tell it again you know I lived in Maryland for many years I lived in Silver Spring Maryland and I taught at the University of Maryland law school which is in Baltimore the main campus is College Park but the law and medical schools are in Baltimore so it's a approximately a 45 minute drive and you go on a major highway 95 north right those of you from that part of the country have fond memories of 95 now 95 North connects essentially well goes all the way to New York whatever it is but uh my stretch of the road would connect Silver Spring Maryland or Washington DC with Baltimore now there is a turnoff to 95 south which takes you to Virginia and eventually Florida if you go long enough and if you're not careful you could easily because the the far far right lane turns into a turning lane to 95 south so when I uh shortly after I moved to Silver Spring and I was driving to Baltimore so you know I was thinking about other things I wasn't watching the road so carefully all of a sudden I start seeing the Washington monuments the Jefferson Memorial and I had never seen those things on the way to Baltimore so a certain feeling of Terror enveloped me because I didn't know how to get out really it's it's a little little hard to turn around and uh I realized o I'm see I seemed to be going into Virginia 95 south I don't know how to get back actually to 95 North you know it is complicated uh now I could have just said well listen I can just go all the way to Florida and then do a U-turn that's how it is all the way Florida Key West and do a little U-turn but I would have been late to class that would have been quite a few hours so I can't even explain this this makes no sense but I'm going to tell you what went through my mind so I started going through you know maybe you're on 9 North maybe you never noticed maybe you could see the Lincoln Memorial from 95 north and you just never noticed it before and everything's fine and I was trying to convince myself you know maybe you're not lost maybe you're on the right road but I knew that wasn't the case but I didn't want to admit that wasn't the case because then I would be lost I'd have to figure out what to do now in Investments this happens all the time this is the proverbial throwing good money after bad you invest money and it's a bust and the investment goes south and you're losing losing losing and you keep on putting in more money because maybe it's going to change maybe it's going to get better of course as Albert Einstein said the very definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again and expect to get a different result but this is how it is we don't want to admit that we're stuck because once we admit we're stuck we got to figure out some way to get out of it of course be so that's true with all of the spiritual isues until I admit I got an issue I got a problem how can I move forward I'm living in a world of denial I'm living in a world of sheer and as the katbi said when the T says distance yourself from a lie karei said it means first and foremost don't lie to yourself right it's not good to lie to anybody when you lie to yourself though you're really in trouble because you're not going to be able to move so moror teaches us be honest in recognizing the slavery acknowledge that even if you're living in comfort and affluence even if there's no external slavery be honest in confronting those issues and the truth is that could be enormously liberating very often a person is afraid to open up certain boxes and you know I'm not not denying that uh these types of inner confrontations can be very scary and sometimes a person may not be ready for them at a given time and place that's another k that that's very very true but ultimately you gotta you got to open up and be honest that's what Mor says Mor says confront your demons be honest recognize your slavery now we then go to matah now matah as I spoke about already has a dual symbolism uh and we talked about it it is both the matah of slavery and the matah of redemption it reminds us we didn't have time to let our let our matah arise and I raised some questions about that reason and those are things you should think about as you approach PES you know talk to your children about it because they are they are actually very very good questions but I want to go off in a little bit of a different direction about matah one of the powerful symbols of matah is that that is said in many many places that the difference between matah and right matah goodat bad at least for PES is thatat is puffed up and it represents GAA arrogance ego matah is flat and matah represents humility and the light of course I have a little bit of a K on that if you look at the Le FR people who eat if you look at what the these PES rolls that they make it looks like it tastes like but technically it's from mat so if you eat shya you know mat mixed with with with oil and the like you could actually eat something that looks exactly like okay putting that issue aside the notion is thatat is arrogance and matah is humility that's a famous Association but Mahar gives another interesting Association of matah and he sayses represents inertia and matah represents decisive action how is that so when water hits flour the only thing that has to happen for it to become Kates is you don't do anything for 18 minutes you don't need yeast you don't need a starter happens when flour and water are left alone for 18 minutes so Kates represents the existence of human life that is iner inert and passive not doing things matah on the other hand requires decisive action meaning when the flower hits the water I got to do something to prevent its Rising meaning I put it in an oven right the the baking process kills the enzymes that cause fermentation that's the scientific idea of why when you bake something it doesn't continue to become you've killed the enzymes by heat so it turns out matah I'm sorry is inertia matah is action so here's the second lesson as important as it is to become aware of our flaws our demons our it's not enough to have awareness the awareness must be translated into concrete action you know there are people who have been in Psychotherapy psychoanalysis for 50 years they can articulate every single trauma that has ever happened to them from birth and maybe even pre-birth traumas preconception traumas you know Gilgo whatever it is they they know everything but they still have not tried to make changes in their lives maybe they like to wallow in the misery or whatever it would be so matah is adding something to Mor morar is about inner awareness matah is about the need to take decisive and corrective action and this is an important CLA in AEM now everybody has moments of inspiration in their lives there are different moments in life maybe they're only isolated moments in which we feel very close to us maybe it's after yum Kipper or maybe it's at you know our wedding or the weddings of our children a bris of our child or our grandchild maybe it might sometimes just be being Ines the great the unbelievable that we often don't think about or even appreciate but what is it is and a person feels nit or rare a person feels aroused but you know if you don't act on the inspiration by concretizing it in an action the inspiration just dissipates it goes away you got to concretize you got to capitalize on inspiration even in a small way even in a small way like um I I remember just reading uh just a m I'm sure many my were like this that one night at midnight a woman in a wedding dress a BRI a Kala just showed up at the Cotto and went to the Cotto for 10 minutes now you know even in y it's a little unusual woman in a wedding dress going to the cotel but she said that she felt so happy that night that she wanted to express her gratitude to Hashem in a very tangible way I don't know where her husband was I I probably don't have the story totally accurately but be it as it may she went to the cotel after the wedding not before the wedding before the wedding you know you're a little anxious you're praying you know things should be good this was a gesture not of teila this was a gesture of toada of gratitude and that's how it works you got to take your understandings and concretize them in tangible ways this also applies in let's assume that you have a grievance or Aus with somebody you haven't been talking for months but what happens in life is every once in a while a person has a stirring and says you know why don't I pick up the phone and just say I'm sorry things have gotten so bad but you know if the phone is 20 ft away from you by the time you get there it's gone Robert Hutchins who was a prodigy in America American Academia he was the president of the University of Chicago at the age of 25 many graduate students were older than him uh and he was really a very brilliant person in many many fields uh but he was not always taking physical care of himself so somebody asked him Dr Hutchins do you ever think about physical exercise and his answer was sure I do I feel that I think about it all the time but every time I have the urge I just lie down a little bit I know it's going to pass see so I just have to wait a few minutes and that's how it is in Ras too so matah says take action it's not enough to be aware Mor is awareness matah is the imperative of action sees the moment as the expression goes carped get a Latin expression but sees the moment right so that's an important lesson and then we have to understand that peros tells us there's a certain power in doing that the power of making those uh little actions because Mitzvah mitzvah when you do one Mitzvah that gives you a spiritual strength to do more and more and more Mitzvah it's like the way they build a bridge if you look at suspension bridges it starts with a single Cable ONE Cable ONE thick cable uh you know just goes from one end to the other end and that cable can then bear the weight of another cable and then you can have a whole Bridge based on that single cable because each each one strengthens the other one right so that's the symbolism spiritually of morar cognitive awareness honesty then we have matah the need for decisive action then we've come to PES again I'm going in reverse order I'll explain in a moment why I reverse the order now the carbon P has many many meanings but I want to focus on one that's very very interesting the Corbin p is a lamb and the lamb can be as young as 30 days it can actually be a small little creature small little little lamb uh theoretically if a person had a big appetite they could finish the whole thing themselves and yet the is very clear it is Aus in the G but the as the ran brings it is Al an individual person by himself cannot bring a Corbin P I have to bring a carbon PES with other people if it's my family I bring it with my family if I don't have a family I attach myself to a group of people either attach myself to a family or unattached people come together and they create a kabura kabura meaning a a group you cannot bring the corbon PES in isolation you must attach yourself to a group so even if you have a big appetite and a small lamb can't do it alone and here is the lesson when we go on the journey to leave our own mits we have to remember the importance of finding a community of people who will share the journey with us because by ourselves it's going to be very very hard to do it this is the idea of community now Community can be anything from husband and wife to broader Community to your SCH to your yiva to the people that you learn with to the people that you dve in with but we have to have community we have to share the journey together so although every person's journey is unique because every person has a different MIT but we have to be surrounded with people who share our value system who share our priorities that doesn't mean sameness I God forbid I don't mean homogenity it's the other way around the beauty of its seore is precisely the different unique perspective Ives that everybody brings but we have to have a common commitment to the Transcendent values of what the Torah represents now P ofos gives us very powerful advice P tells us acquire for yourself a friend so the ramban addresses a very simple question why is it important to have friends what if I don't want to have a friend I I like I like being alone right what's wrong why do I have to have a friend in the world so the rambam actually this is actually taken from Aristotle actually but but the rambam brings it and the rambam says there are three purposes for friendship the first I I'll use a modern term the first is utilitarian because there are times in which you know you're stuck your car ran out of gas you you lost your keys if you don't have a friend like who do you call when you get in trouble so friends are like insurance policies that you know unless you invest in Friendship you're not going to have someone to help you out when you're in trouble so that's called utilitarian friendship friendship as insurance policy the second aspect of friendship the rambam says is that mankind are social beings most of us at least and there's a certain amount of loneliness you know we're lonely if we have nobody to talk to nobody to share to we get lonely so friendship is an antidote to loneliness and boredom so these are two different things one is the utilitarian aspect of help me helping me out when I'm in trouble the other is uh the antidote to loneliness and boredom but then the rambam says there's a third benefit of friendship which is the greatest and most important and that is friendship is a means of spiritual Fellowship that through friendship we grow together we challenge each other to be the best that we can be to grow as it were uh because everybody has moments of weakness and moments of strength and in moments of weakness my friend can give me the strength to be M myself and in moments when he's weak he or she is weak we can give the friend that strength this is what says in Co two are better than one because if one Falls and they are alone who will pick him up but when there are two and one Falls one will pick up the other now this is not only talking about ice although with ice it's undoubtedly true this is talking about life generally that when I have a friend now a friend can be again a friend can be a spouse in an ideal way that's exactly it remember spouses are called husb and wife are called in Beloved friends and sometimes Romantics don't like that they say h you're describing the relationship of husband and wife as friends that's a trivialization friends that's what they are the answer is if we understood what friendship was that's the greatest thing you can have the greatest gift you can have is the friendship of helping each other be the best person they can be now it's interesting that those friendships May sometimes be difficult meaning if I simply have a social friendship a utilitarian friendship then you know have a good time with somebody go out for pizza go out for coffee go bowling what what whatever whatever it's going to be and if they do things that aren't so great I can forget about it I do things that aren't so great they can forget about it because the Friendship is not meaningful in the sense of building us up but when it's a friendship of spiritual Fellowship that does mean I want you to be the best person you can be you want me to be the best person I can be there's sometimes going to be difficult discussions sometimes each one will challenge the other to be a better person with love and support of course and the rambam says that is the innermost me meaning of to have a friend in life so I can be raised to be better than I would have been without that person as I say ideally this would be the husband wife relationship but even outside of marriage we we we need to gravitate towards friends and communities that help us become the best person spiritually that we're able to be so now we have P represent three steps in the spiritual Liberation from our own MIT Mor be honest and acknowledging my flaws and my slavery matah the imperative of action P the importance of community and friendship in bringing me to the place where I can achieve all of that now the only question that you might ask is this let's look at at the Seder here now the Seder we first eat matah then we eat moror and PES is eaten at the end that's the ISB P but here's the thing if mat represents action and morar represents awareness of what I need to correct then how can you eat the matah before the morar how can I take action to correct something until if I until I've identified what it is I need to correct so why do I eat matah and then moror I should eat maror and then matah the answer is there's a profound psychological insight in that as well that is although it is undoubtedly the case you cannot take action to improve a situation until you've identified what it is you need to improve otherwise you're just running around like a chicken without a head but before you contemplate your not you have to internalize within yourself that you have the capacity to take corrective action because here is the thing often when I contemplate my failures my inadequacies my MIT triumphs instead of encouraging me to change things and improve things I can often be depressed I can often be despondent I can often lose hope so before you go down the moral path you need to be aware of the matah path that whatever problems you have you can correct and Hashem will liberate you through the power of so psychologically I got to absorb the lesson of the matah before I am ready for the lesson of the morar so it's matah Mor and then we have k k is the matah mor sandwich in which I take the problem and the solution and I deal with both of them right the problem is the morar the matah is the action of the solution and then I can incorporate the problem and the answer and work on them in that way so again these are double meanings as I say on one hand the story of The Exodus is bound with the histo historicity of on the other hand it is also a manual for the spiritual Liberation that we have to go through yes it's not yet PES time I understand so it sounds like I'm talking about the holiday of PES but as I say the sh Kadesh and other sources indicate that during these weeks of the we are in fact experiencing the light of p b unpin in a small microcosm and therefore the lessons of PES are very very relevant uh to this particular time so Mayes allow us to be liberated not only from the external oppressors that try to destroy us and you know thank God we're hopefully making progress in that beem as we get closer to GAA but more importantly than even than even that as important as that is may we be liberated from the inner Mims that enslave us uh to be able to open ourselves up to be mael the great light of's Redemption thank you [Music] it