Ten Minutes of Meaning (Part 133): Faithful Thoughts - Mesillas Yesharim

good morning and welcome back to 10 minutes of meaning our weekly 10 minutes of mesila susharam trying to improve ourselves and trying to develop a better and towards a best version of ourselves i want to thank our serious sponsors for the year or dear friends honey lenny grundstein in memory of mr aaron tamborghan his father aran ben yitzhak is neshama and aliyah if you'd like to sponsor a future share please email lee lee at brsonline.org we are concluding we are finishing the parak we are finishing the next meet the next quality of the meda of ta'ara tahara we've been developing is the idea of not only doing the right things but doing them for the right reasons how can we purify our thoughts our intent our motivation our drive that we're not driven by competitiveness we're not driven by ego we're not driven by honor we're not driven by ulterior motive but tahara there's a purity to our heart there's a purity to our thought there's a purity to our our our intention what are the things that are the challenge what knocks us off course one of the themes of messily showing has consistently reminded us is to not only define what we're trying to achieve and to not only make resolutions and chart a path on how to get there but to also anticipate and identify what will knock us off course what are the obstacles and impediments what are the challenges because if all you do is unleash that drive if all you do is pursue the goal but you don't anticipate and you don't understand you don't see before you the challenges then they will knock us off course they will trip us up we will stumble and fall over them it's been a theme throughout each of the character traits of this 12-step program called music so what are the obstacles what are the impediments what are the challenges what will knock us off course from achieving this wonderful quality of tahara from purifying our motive our intent is the number one is not being contemplative not thinking just running through life being taken by momentum not pausing not stopping not thinking not being mindful not being present so much of our day is consumed by the draw we have to things which are pleasurable but in a fleeting way for the moment and we're tempted to indulge in them because they provide a momentary joy a momentary pleasure a momentary happiness but as quickly as we experience them and they come they disappear and they dissipate but we're not mindful if we're not contemplative we're not thoughtful if we're not present then we'll eat that thing that we'll regret then we'll look at then we'll say then we'll go then we'll listen to then we'll make decisions which sabotage our own success sabotage our holiness sabotage our happiness how could that be we're thoughtful we're brilliant we're capable we're human beings we are the most developed of all creatures and yet we don't avoid the very things that threaten us the very things that undermine us and the reason is a failure of mindfulness a failure of intention a failure to be conscientious and conscious in all that we're doing so a person needs to contemplate and think about a person needs to have context and perspective on the kryptonite on the poison on the contamination physically emotionally mentally psychologically spiritually which though they might be pleasurable for the moment ultimately they're not in our best interest they're not for our good things like honor feels good in the moment ego and honor are inflated praise somebody is posting sharing inviting promoting feels good in the moment it's not good for the neshama it's not good for the soul to be fed to have an inflated ego to pursue honor and ta'anugim the worldly pleasure is nothing wrong with indulging and enjoying the pleasures of god's world he wants us to he holds us accountable and responsible if we fail to but yet we can't over indulge indulge indiscriminately in the wrong time the wrong place with the wrong people and so on so a person needs to be mindful a person needs to be contemplative intentional a person needs to be thoughtful the beginning of every day what are my goals how do i pursue them and what will i not allow to knock me off course if you know that when i come home late at night i get a late night craving what do i have in my cabinet or refrigerator will i eat it all do i need to eat it all how do i become determined even before the threat or danger arises determined who i will be and how i will live so that i can overcome so that i can persevere so that i won't give in to that which i know will compromise will underline um the first two factors that we just talked about that can distract us namely the pleasure and the pursuit of honor they are a person's thinking they lure us they draw us they distract us they consume us they drive us they confuse us just like an adulteress who consorts unfaithfully with other men we're supposed to be thinking about how can i be of service what difference can i make why am i in this world how can i draw close to god to the people around me how can i strive and stretch for holiness and happiness we understand our priorities and yet it's as if our mind our thoughts have an affair by going elsewhere we're unfaithful we're unfaithful in our drive we're unfaithful in our thoughts and again the theme of this paragraph tehara is even if we're doing the right things but if we're doing them for the wrong reasons we are unfaithful so we're volunteering or we're getting stuck or we're learning torah or we have the longest shimon esther but the reason we do all those things is for the positive attention it draws for the honor for the ego then it's as if our mind is having is unfaithful foreign we have already in the torah and by midbar and pasha last week's parsha the torah already refers to externally oriented motives the torah refers to sonos superficial thinking very material base animal thinking when we think in a way that we're concerned externally not the preemies not the depth of who we are not the essence of who we are not the core of who we are not returning to the root that is connected to god of who we are but the martial that external superficial drive the torah refers to that as nusa lev that is considered adultery of the heart we read it we didn't only read it last week we read it today and we'll read it tomorrow we read it yesterday it's the third paragraph don't must not search following your heart and your eyes we tend to stray we tend to be mesane we tend to be unfaithful we tend to be distracted we tend to be driven we tend to stray with our eyes the tendency of the heart is to stray from the ideal perspective from what we were meant to cleave to and to cling to and to pursue but we stray from that to vanities and false appearances our focus should be singular like the olympic athlete who's training tonight i'm behind the bema we are hosting abdi deutsch who uh tremendous award winning marathon runner we'll talk to her about that drive competitiveness we'll also talk to how do you deal with coming up short and failure but the olympic athlete the one who's training for greatness is singularly focused doesn't allow themselves but one of the best ways to get kids to avoid drugs and alcohol when they're young when they're competing in sports because they want to be their best they want to compete they want to win and they're not going to put something into their system which will slow it down or compromise it we have to be singularly focused on what does it mean to be our best our best mother father son daughter our best husband wife what does it mean to be our best to go on dates as our best to spend time with our children as our best to learn torah as our best when we're meant to be dominating at our best what does it mean to be the best version ourselves in each of the situations and then like the athlete who's driven like the entrepreneur who only thinks about building his or her company to be so singularly focused and say why would i engage in that why would i put that in my system why would i slow myself down why would i cloud my judgment why would i give up my goal for some fleeting pleasure that has to be our attitude that has to be our focus our determination not velocira don't be distracted entrepreneur is not distracted by the here and now they are driven they want to build their business they have goals they want to pursue them the athlete wants to pursue them different arenas of life want to pursue them um and latter factor preparing oneself insufficiently that's one of the great stumbling blocks or obstacles to living a life of tahara is to not be prepared because if you're not prepared you come home late at night and you know that you always get cravings late at night and you have a cabinet that's filled with potato chips and corn chips you have a cabin that's filled with things that are unhealthy for you and you haven't done the preparation you haven't become determined how you'll react and what you'll do when the urge arises then you're finished then you're done it prevents the removal from what's hard of the innate thoughtlessness that derives from the material world is the thoughtfulness befores the divine service with its stench it's sichuro no it's it's repulsive it's something which is rotten to its core if we're not prepared you can't have holiness without preparation turn friday into heir of shabbos means to be prepared to walk into every meeting know how we want it to end to walk into every conversation knowing what is our goal to walk into every circumstance understanding what am i trying to extract from it to walk into every vulnerable moment determined how i will overcome that's what it means to live with tahara is not just to be focused externally on our actions but internally on our motivation and drive to be thoughtful and present and contemplative and when we are then we can direct ourselves to our best selves with that would conclude parakeet zion chapter 17 and we conclude the media of tahara we will move over next week is our last week we are on next wednesday morning it's our last week until after tishma we're going to take a break after next week chapter 18 we continue next week but bear meme stay with us in 20 minutes for living with emunah tonight 9pm we go behind the beam with bidi deutsch until next time stay happy stay healthy and stay holy