The Essence of Communication

is the famous story of a man who forgot his anniversary he goes to his rabbi goes rabbi I don't know what I did wrong I never goes listen go out to the store buy the biggest bouquet of flowers you can afford and go bring it to your wife he goes out to the store buys this huge bouquet of flowers he knocks on his door his wife opens door goes and he goes here the rabbi told me to buy these for you what is the core of a relationship and that is one thing and one thing only communication what you do pales into comparison to what you say but what is communication sometimes you see this with a husband in a wife she may say you don't tell me enough that you love me he may say my whole life is for you I work every second for you because the essence of communication is not what you say in the way you speak the essence of communication is the humility to speak in the way that they hear it now this is true between man and man which it is this is absolutely true with us between us and God what do I mean if Forbes was coming out with the top hundred most powerful Jews ever I'm talking about money power influence who would be number one on that list isn't it Joseph he ultimate success story the rags to riches what was the secret of his success let's go back the brothers were putting Joseph in a pit not only to do with him they're eating their meal they look up and they see in a caravan of Arab merchants and they were carrying on this Caravan spices all these sweet-smelling spices and they say why don't we sell him to Egypt and all the commentators say wait a second why in the world do we care what's on the caravans and the answer there as she gives is in those days the Arab merchants were known for trading in very terrible smelling substances but because Joseph was righteous God made a miracle and had Arab merchants on that day carrying sweet smelling spices what's your problem with this you want to pull a miracle god I don't know why don't you have the caravan breakdown and send them home so what really happened Josef's on the way down but be Joseph for a moment one day your father wakes up and then all you know is your father sent you to Italian your brother's picked you up sell you so Joseph thinks arguably his father sold them out Joseph's all the way down to Egypt and he is alone no mom no dad no brothers no God nothing and he starts to descend and descend into that place of hopelessness and loneliness all the sudden something happens on the carriage wait a second these are Arab merchants and they always carry petroleum and tar why their spices God never told Joseph go down I'll be with you all God did was take a small nuance and shifted it a drop but Joseph the king of success understood the communication is that why I like to hear it it's the way you say it and what made Joseph so successful whether he had the humility to hear the way God speaks not the way we speak and he held on and he held on and like everyone else in life that holds on at some point you look back and go I guess we think that God doesn't talk to us you know why because he's not speaking to us in English and we're sitting around waiting every day come on I'm going to believe in you talked my language told me miracles and every second of every day every one of us in this room God speaks to all a law that we never have the humility to see because we're waiting for it to be in our language and God goes I'm talking to you and every spice in every move I'm talking to