The Orphan (Rosh Hashanah)

There is a very strong dichotomy when we come to the of Sh which you might have heard before and that is obviously when we're coming to yin we are discussing the intrepidation the fear of standing before the mishpat the person is on skddo about to be acknowledged whether he's going to make it this year or not especially when we're getting to these older years for some of us and we end up getting to that stage we know that every year is precious every year is a present every year needs to be appreciated and therefore when we stand on rashashana in fear and intrepidation as the midrash springs that a person doesn't even dress properly he doesn't get a haircut properly he's he's he's scared puss like this guy who killed Kirk who's really in a place where he might get the chair he might end up getting killed so he is in a certain stage of fear that's what we're supposed to feel during this time period obviously the chauffar is there to remind us of that when it speaks about the and and the calling of the chauffar which is bent over as the Gar says in and it's bent over because we are supposed to be bent over in front of or the fact that it's called from being poor the concept of the fact that we are poor in front of because we are in fear of what can take place and what is up against in front of us as the midrash brings it to you that says the malim didn't understand Why we don't sing sh on rash sh it's a time to sing shir that's a time for us to appreciate for taking care of us and we should be singing shiru says they're standing in front of us bin how can they go ahead and sing shir and that's the reason we don't say halal halal on the day of rash so alop we see from everything we've spoken out that it seems to be a time of fear but if we are familiar at the same time it is a time of of satisfaction writes as it says Ezra said on talking we're supposed to eat and drink and be merry we're supposed to get dressed properly as is brought down in hash the idea is that it's important for us to dress properly unlike someone standing in front of a din we're supposed to be sitting in tranquility satisfaction gleem we know that as the Russian says over there, he's going to do for us a miracle. He's going to help us out stands in front of us and he's going to help us out and he's going to pass us through the we're going to make it this year and he's going to take care of us. He loves us. And since he loves us so much, therefore, it's called a it's called a connector. It's a place of connection with it's how do we resolve this? You might have heard the question but it's very important to practically understand how such a thing can occur. You can be in fear and in s at the same time. A feeling of love and fear simultaneously. It seems obscure. It seems strange. It seems unusual. This irony requires to be resolved and the answer is I'm going to tell you an incredible story and this story is a true story 100%. I heard it from the person who heard it directly from the couple itself and this is a perfect resolution to this problem and that is once once there was a Alman and Almana that were getting married a widow and a widowerower. They were young. Unfortunately, they lost their spouse at a very young age. Each one for a different reason. And they got engaged. When they got engaged, as is usual, the Almana, the widow, she went to go meet his three children. He had a child, seven, five, and four. And he went to go meet her three children to see Batashem. We're going to make a new family together. when she met the child, the seven-year-old, he said, "Oh, I'm so happy you're going to come into our family and you're going to take us to the park and tell us to go home when it gets nightfall." She didn't understand what he was talking about. Tell me to go to the home when you go nightfall. Most kids aren't interested in that. After asking, requesting a explanation, the boy said like this, the older boy who was 7 years old, he said, "When my mommy was around, she used to take us very often to the park. All my friends were there. All the kids were there. I used to go with my siblings and we used to enjoy ourselves over there. But whenever it started getting close to dark, close to when it was nightfall, mommy would tell us, "It's time to go home." And it was very frustrating, irritating, almost annoying. It's not fair. Everybody else is out in the park. You're there. Someone goes in, but why can't I stay out longer? And I would ask her, "Can I go? Can I stay? Can I stay?" And she would say, "No, honey. It's time to come in." No, it's time to come in. Cassador day in and day out. That was the conundrum. That's how it kept going day in and day out. And it was quite upsetting. I got used to it, but it was frustrating. But you know when mommy says, mommy listens. This was obvious story for many years ago. When mommy says, mommy listens. Anyways, that is the what happened. Now we should hear from such things. But not long afterwards, this mommy, this mother of this child got a very serious sickness and she got the mahala and very soon she was nifar. It was a very short and quick death unfortunately leaving this husband an alman leaving this the widowerower without a wife. They sat Shiva for seven days in their house and you know as kids are kids they understood bar what was going on but that's it. They said Shiva. And then on the eighth day when it was time that they could leave the house, guess where they went? They went to the park. The three kids went to the park and they stayed there till nightfall. And they said, "Haha, now mommy's not around to tell us to go home. So we get to stay later." And here they are. One kid goes home, another family goes home, another few kids go home cuz their mommies are all calling up. But us, but these kids, I don't have that problem. They were able to stay longer because they have no mommy to come home. You're asking about Tati. Well, I think everybody knows the answer. Aba doesn't get involved. So anyways, they stayed in and they stayed longer at the park and still it started getting dark and lonely and truth is a little bit scary even and maybe even boring. And they were waiting to be summoned into the house, but nobody was there to summon them into the house. Suddenly at that moment they discovered that they were orphans. Then they discovered they wereim. At the minute that they didn't have that person that would tell them what to do and put them in place and give them those parameters, suddenly they realized they are parentless. Yes, we stand in fear during rash sham. Yes, we stand in a realization that we're doing things maybe that are not fantastic over the year. We have someone telling us not to go right, not to go left. Do this and do that and do things appropriately. Know how you speak and know what to speak and when not to speak. Know when to put on those fill and when to go to when to not touch the lights and when yes you can touch the lights and when you're allowed to go here and when you're not allowed to go there. When you're allowed to eat and when you're not allowed to eat and when it's a mitz and when it's an isser. Yes, we have a lot of rules in this religion. It's quite a lot and it can be tough. And here we are standing on Roshasham about to decide how good a job we did. But all those limitations and standing in front of that judgment and being in fear of what's going to happen and knowing that you are standing in front of me tells us just that that we're not orphans. We're not yet. We have an abim. We have our tati upstairs and he's connected to us and he loves us and he's looking right at us. Yes, he might be judging us, but he's looking us straight in the eyes. He's paying attention to every action that I do. He cares about my action. And he tells me when it's dark to come in from the park and not to stay out so late. And you know what? That's real. That's a relax. That's very relaxing. That's enjoyable. It comes from a place of fear. Wow. I hope I'm keeping up with my schedule that I need to do. But it comes from a place of love, of a connection. I have a tati. I have a father up in Shamayim. I have a papa. He's up there looking at me. He's paying attention. It's not even up in Jamaim. He's right in front of my face looking at what I'm going to do. And that's how we find in all the Did you ever pay attention? Allah says always talks about this word and therefore and therefore where does this word come from? go through the whole entire this word only appears one place in the whole entire Torah and Esther says before she's about to go to in the most fearful scary place that she's about to walk in uncalled she's about to go in it was against the law and very easily if his scepter was not picked up, her head would be chopped off. She knew that she was putting herself exactly into status that we're standing on on Rosh Shah life or death. And still she went into it with fear but with happiness. You know why? Because said who knows if this is the reason why you were put to be that's the reason why you became the mala in the first place. She knows that she's doing on Hashem. She knows that she's going to save. She knows that she's doing the appropriate thing and this is my whole this is the purpose for why I was put here and why I was born. So, she's very happy about that. So, yes, it's scary, but yes, it's close and it's not a contradiction because that scariness makes me so close to Abba. It makes me so close to my father. It makes me realize that I have a father that I'm not a I'm not an MUD who is such a great nation that we have au the don't have so many seven they have in the basics and here we are with a bunch of it but doesn't that tell us something doesn't that mean that that means we're living together with the one who loves us oh so much there's a whole contradiction about whether one should cry or not on you're not supposed to cry in the would cry all the time in yum He would take the tears and wipe it on his forehead. The place of the a yes or no yes crying no crying. The answer is as the writes as the writes and ra and others that if it come the also speak the rama that if it comes from a place from inside out go ahead and cry. Don't instill the crying it shouldn't be something external to have yourself cry. If you're feeling a cry of lacking something that's a problem I don't want you to feel lacking. It's a cry of fulfillment of being connection. There's a cry that you see when someone was sitting for a loved one. But there's a different cry. Go to the go to the place when you seeman should happen to any of us. Someone who has a relative that was captive in Aza and they got outm the amount that we got out over a few 150 that came out. Each one of those families when they were put together with that child. Why? Why cries tears all over the place. What are you crying about? You're happy. There's a cry that comes from a gloating of sima of an apparent amount of overabundance of emotion a tremendous connection and that comes from a good place and that's allowed on yum kiper that's allowed on rashashana because we suddenly come to the realization that yes it's scary but yes it's so ze it's so enjoyable I'm connected I have a relationship he's looking at me we're paying attention comes from a place that there is an interaction between me and the reborn there's nothing sweeter than that there's nothing more enjoyable than that. And there's nothing more fantastic than that little boy who's coming home in the park and he can't wait to hear the cry of mommy saying to him, "Honey, it's time to come home. It's time to come home. Come. Supper is hot and waiting for you on the table.