The Purpose of Life - Rebbetzin Raquel Kirszenbaum

so hello my name is raquel uh i'm in your schedule so you should know that i'm from panama so i do have an accent but i think you have an accent too sometimes i'm talking to british people i have no idea what they're saying you know but whatever so i'm from panama i teach here in nevada so great so i'm very happy to be teaching you so beautiful just remember laugh at everything i say because it's not good okay right so i'm sure since you guys are just starting from like sort of like not so much background i guess in july then you have a lot of questions you have a lot of questions i always say i had too many questions at 17. someone was answering them so this is what i'm doing and answering all my questions so what is one of the questions you have pretty much the main one when you start thinking you become a mature person and you start thinking what is the first thing that comes into your mind and a question that keeps like hunting you you know what what's the point the point of why that's my question great what's up on the world what's the point what's the point of anything great anyone wants to like rephrase that in a better way because why someone yourself why are we here great what's the point of here beautiful why are we here i always used to ask that question you know when i was 17 i was already like really good i'm gonna party for that long but how much would you buy you know when you see someone and they're like 45 and then people coming to a discotheque and you're just like getting like you know guess what maybe you'll be that 45 year old lady i hope not you know but at 17 i started wondering what am i doing in the world did i just came to the party and go shopping and go to a movies it can't be that life is so empty right so what am i really doing here you know in life what matters the most is not what car you're driving but where are you going you could be driving the best car in the world but if you don't have a destination you're just wasting gas most people sadly are wasting gas do you really know where you're going you ever wonder this where am i going what am i doing here you know everyone asks the question why why in hebrew why is called nana this is a very nice word very colorful okay you know what happens in israel when you ask someone llama you ever had this everyone is really here when you ask someone llama you know what you get so in israel whenever you say llama why you get that's why who cares and you know i'm not saying israelis are not sensitive but when you really think about it what's the point of just asking why are you ever gonna change anything that happened to you but asking why yes or no no why why do you want to know why because maybe it gives it meaning maybe it gives an understanding but in reality why is not the question you should be asking you know why israelis whenever someone asks why they say that's why because if not you would never move on in life you would always stay in the same place asking the same questions why why why the jewish question is not why lana same word different vowels you know what lemma means for what right who said that somewhere over here for what for what was this what's the purpose what am i doing here it's not why am i here what or what you know when i was younger i asked one time to my rabbi how do you really know that each jewish person will ever get a message how do you know some people are so far away you really think god is gonna send them a message so he told me like this a hundred years ago there was a guy that he was a farmer so every day he used to go out work the line you know i thought i hope i never used to come back i used to watch black and white newspaper they were always black and white okay great then 30 years later his son does the same thing he goes he wants to learn he comes back home now there's black and white tv right 30 years later he goes out he works the line he comes back home there's like one thirty years later i hope there's still people working the lineup but whatever he goes out he works around and at some point he lifts up his shoulder and he starts thinking really what am i doing you know and what would most people say this is what my father did and my grandfather did and everyone has been doing so you know i go i go it's time to get to work and you keep on doing the same thing but some of us will actually ask really this is what life is about in other words a song and some people will say there's gonna be more to life you know that song right there was a famous israeli comedian every day he used to go out do a show come back and have fun you know the life of the rich and famous buddha one day he was changing in the bathroom and he saw a little ant that was walking and kept on crashing against the door and walked back if that would have been an aunt in my house i'm set finally that means i'm ocd i'm a clean creek i would have stepped on it on five seconds in my house you could eat from the floor like literally but this guy was looking at the ant and he saw like she couldn't move forward she kept on walking crashing walking back walking crashing walking back do you ever feel like this you're walking but you don't move anywhere you're just stuck in the same place so at some point he said oh my god i'm like this um i just keep on watching i'm not getting anywhere and he started saying there's ha there's gotta be more and he went looking and he found answers so the question i want to deal with is what are we doing here but before that right i want to give you a longer introduction right the idea of questioning is a very jewish idea there's actually a famous part in the torah or in judaism that has these four questions remember when you were reading the center of pesach you remember this there were the four children right so there was who knows the four children first one is the ham yeah the wise one second one i like how you say it in british jose wicked could you say that okay whatever i always say i like how people say quicker okay great so there is the ham the wise one the wicked one the time the simple one the shinoya the alice all that what that doesn't know how to ask so my first question was why are there only four children in case you haven't noticed religious people love having children children in a religious house is like 8.4 average of children in an arab house is 9.4 so we should work because this is a democracy after all so let's get on it girls yeah average your children in a non-religious house i mean secular non-jewish whatever you want it's 1.4 one kid and one dog so the question is why are there only four children and not more so the torah answers these four children represent the four stages or the four you know areas or whatever you want to call it in history of the jewish people and if you ever think about it it happened in each one of your families guaranteed first time 300 years ago everyone knew torah there were always people that you know studied more less rebellious whatever but people's story torah anyone here you know your great-grandfather used to know all these things remember this no because you didn't meet him but i'm sure your mother used to tell you and your grandmother that your great-great-grandfather was a rabbi i don't know where or something i don't know what yeah everyone see this last year i was watching fiddler on the roof for the first time in english you ever watched fit on the roof everyone knows this part it's really important so he grabs it to teeth and he says and what is this you may ask and i'll tell you i don't know and since when have i been using it as long as i can remember i was looking at the movie and i was so angry i started yelling no what's that tradition tradition means i do it because my parents did it and i don't know commandment means it has meaning it was given by god right there's something to it imagine if someone comes to you with a torah full of 613 traditions would you keep it hell no why should i do all these stupid things i'm just going to throw them outside of the window you know sits it actually is one of the 613 commandments each second amongst where a man where to eat he's following all them you know this each second you wear a tittie it's as if you're keeping off the mitothera it's not a tradition it's a commandment but you know what it looks like if i'm just doing tradition i'm just gonna be like devious daughter that one of them was froome then the other one went a little bit off and then the other one ended up you know more off and that's exactly what's going on in the jewish people second son he says why should i keep the judaism you know this is so hard it's just whatever what does he do he becomes wicked the wicked child he rebels you see this in history yeah he rebels he doesn't want to do anything the third son he's the dumb the simple one he says his father doesn't do anything but his grandfather does a little bit so he does a little bit are you maybe there probably the fourth son he's called enoyo de alex i don't know how to say it in ashkenazi i'm sorry i know you're the addition means he doesn't know what to ask you know why he doesn't know how to ask because pretty much the only thing he knows about judaism is that he's jewish do you know people like this practically everyone you know it's like this the only thing they know about judaism is that they're jewish i don't know what statistics are in england but i could tell you more than 70 i could even say 80 percent of american jewish people the only thing they know about judaism is that they're jewish isn't that a scary thing makes me want to cry can i tell you crazier statistics don't cry yeah what is the first thing you do when you come to israel what is the first thing people take you to do you go where kotel yeah or the koi so right afterwards you go to mahanega afterwards you go to eat like a crepe it's like the three main things to do in israel yeah can i tell you a crazy thing 20 facts by the way 23 of israelis only go to the hotel when they're initiated in the army you know that that means that ult until 18 they never went to dakota you understand this until 18 they have never gone to a cotton 23 percent of israelis don't know how to say the shma isn't that sad we're not talking about people in america and bolivia and panama no one knows where they are actually paramount the biggest jewish community in the world percentage-wise but no one knows that we're more than three percent of the country go panama go panama okay we didn't make it to a mundial so i guess we're not that good we didn't have who's this guy david beckham whatever the point is isn't that a sad thing so i started thinking what's going on because we're not getting any bigger you know 2 000 years ago we were 11 million jewish people 2000 years later where 40 million we're the only people that don't grow right i know you could say we had inquisition we had this we had that but that's not the point how are we not growing we have 8.4 kids per faculty some families have 18 how could it be i have announced she came to my house from los angeles for my brother's bar mitzvah so she was sitting there and she started talking to us so at some point she started crying i never met her she came because panama is like number one place to visit in forbes magazine you know last year number one place this is why it's becoming so expensive because you people keep on coming to visit maybe i shouldn't invite you great but the point is so she came and she was talking to us and at some point she started crying so i look at her and i'm very blunt it's not a good thing so i look at her and i said why are you crying so she said by the way she was friday that means everyone's already here sorry usually have no assimilation they're much more traditional if you're syrian no assimilation moroccan a little bit more persian a little bit more depression they have to get on track right but what happened sorry i see your brush and don't get offended it's fun you're iraqi huh yeah that's why i love iraqi people okay great but you know that's a good thing great okay if you don't have no idea what we're talking about it's fine my husband also had no idea what a fight it was when i got married i married ashkenazi i know i'm a sinner what can i do but uh i don't make a filthy fish and i keep on making lahmajin and all these things you know so when i got married i told my husband you know with friday people we use spices so it goes to me he's like what's that i'm like you know there's salt and other things ashkenazi only know that saltex is not even pepper oh my god so he went to a supermarket and he got me one of each spice and more than 45 spices i have no idea what to use them for so now i feel very spiced up okay whatever so the point is so my aunt was sitting there i look at her zero anything she doesn't keep anything she's one of these ladies that her she makes her kids fast on yom kippur are you one of these you know i don't know anything about you raise them i just know i have to fast once a year for 25 hours does that sound like something good for you no i don't want to fast on young people it's not even good for my diet because afterwards you cheat on yourself and think because you fast you could break it eating all these things so at the end of the day you end up gaining like three kilos after fasting for one day so no purpose so i look at my aunt she's crying and i tell her but why are you crying so she looks at me like i'm not very smart and she says i told you my son is marrying a non-jew my grandchildren are not going to be jewish so i look at her again and i say this is like a boom moment i said but what did you gave them that was jewish you know it's a question everyone should ask themselves if i would ask you right now are you proud of being jewish you would say yes what are you proud of you ever think about this because we're smart we we win nobel prizes we're we have startup companies that's not jewish why are we proud of i could guarantee you most of us could not say something that has real value that we're going to pass on so you're proud of what we don't even know what we're proud of right we don't even know what we're proud of so how are we going to keep it there was a you know i want to ask you really important question you should ask yourself this in the eyes of a non-religious jew non-religious what's the difference between a jew and a non-jew in the eyes of a non-religious jew what's the difference between a jew and a non-jew what's the difference yeah i know you're on tv but you know the costume but if you're not religious you don't keep costumes you're farting so you don't count on this category yeah in the eyes of a non-religious jew what's the difference between a jew and a non-jew if you cannot come up with something is because there's none there's no difference between a jew and a non-jew in the eyes of an unreligious jew the nose maybe i think i have a nice nose some of you also do some of you don't but that's life you can't have everything it can't be perfect you know in the eyes of a non-religious jew there's no difference between a jew and a non-jew so now let me ask you then why should i keep being jewish if everyone persecutes me and wants to kill me and hates me does that make sense no that's why i will not keep on being jewish that makes sense why should i fight for something i don't even know what i have and it comes with such a big weight it doesn't make sense you know i have i have a friend she's a convert she's a black convert which means it's a really hard thing right she converted at like 30 something it's a hard thing you have to leave your family you have to start from zero who are you going to get married every time we used to sit down and eat i'm not joking her blessings are like this atta hashem and you're like could you hurry up because i just want to eat you know and i started thinking oh my god this girl is sacrificing everything for something she doesn't have and i was born with this and i never checked it out you know how many of you have checked it out you know when you go into the airport israeli people or no israeli people jewish people when they're daviding they always pretend to be talking on their cell phone did you ever notice this they're like talking to our bluetooth because they don't want anyone to notice and i always go and they hide you ever notice this and if you ask them why they're hiding they'll say concentration arabs they open their carpet in the middle of the airport and they start allah they induce everyone you know they do the whole business why are the jewish people hiding so they'll tell us for concentration we know it's because we're embarrassed you ever feel embarrassed you know you ever walk next to a jewish guy and you feel like you're embarrassed that they'll notice you with him you are right why are we embarrassed because so people will say we're embarrassed because we don't like being different really you think queen elizabeth minds being different she doesn't wear pants she doesn't eat french fries with her finger maybe she does that in the bathroom but you shouldn't eat in the bathroom right i hope queen elizabeth doesn't see this video okay i'm sure she won't get it maybe kate middleton there's rumors you know but whatever right but why doesn't she mind being different because i'll tell you what i learned in life people don't mind being different they've been different as long as your differences make you great right if you just won the lottery would you be the only different one would you mind it no bring it on why because my difference makes me great that means that if i value and i appreciate my differences i don't mind being different but when i don't know where they are and what do they mean and why are they important then i don't want them i want to be just like everyone else so maybe that means we don't really know what makes us different in a good way what makes us special urban outfitters made a shirt it was the jewish shirt anyone saw this was the start of david and around it it had money signs that's jewish it's all about the money money money you know that's what creates anti-semitism that's what people think jewish means money jewish that's not what jewish means so what does it mean by the way can i tell you that torah asked where is the fifth child yeah good question so atora gives you one of two answers number one answer he's gone this happens everywhere just in america seven more than seven million million jewish people assimilated that's more than hitler killed we're doing hitler's job for free right seven million you know what happens to a fifth son number one answer he's gone i have a friend she's the last jew in her family everyone else assimilated everyone except for her happens to be that she only had brothers and all the uncles had brothers men and she's the only girl so at least by the way even if she wouldn't marry non-jew her kids would still be jewish but who knows next yeah but you know what's the other part the other side of the fifth child and this is pretty much your responsibility i know i'm telling you so much at 19. you're like this is such a big thing but you know my favorite quote is from spider-man with great power comes great responsibility so you're powerful people you know what's the other option for the fifth child says that he goes back into being the first child how is the first child called wise you see this not the religious one the wise one ask questions look for truth that's the only thing god expects from you you know in hebrew we have a concept called the yetzer which means the evil inclination the evil inclination never gives you a moment to ask questions you ever noticed this you're always running watching tv radio books advertisement naked people everywhere why because he know that if you just stop for one moment you might question and you might look for answers and answers give you responsibility and he doesn't want you to do that i have a song in my ipod it sounds like this stop don't think about it be careful every day you know stop don't think about it that's what the world says don't think about it just keep on moving yeah that's a bad thing you should stop you should think about it because again if you're just driving but you have no idea where you're going you're wasting gas doesn't matter how fancy your car is there's no purpose for your car because the car's purpose is to take you to your destination so the question is what is your destination yeah imagine someone comes to you with a huge gift beautifully wrapped beautiful box nice paper nice ribbon and it's a guy so you open the first box and what do you find inside another box does this makes you exciting of course because if it's a guy and he has two boxes must be something good because he wrapped it twice you know you open up the second box another box another box and all the books are you getting really excited you open up last box decide you don't even open it up you're already calling to tell your parents you're getting engaged you're so excited you open up the last box what do you find inside nothing what do you do first you kick him on the balls you know second what do you do with the boxes what do you do with the boxes what do you do with the boxes guys this is easy easy question you throw them out if you're cheap you'll save them for your next present yeah why do you throw them out because the only purpose of the boxes was to enhance the gift but if there's no gift there's no purpose for the box or for the ribbon or for anything else growing up i think most people right we grow up and what do we think we were giving this huge gift it's called jewish it comes with a huge weight but when you open it up you don't know what's inside do you ever feel like that great so i invite you to open up your books maybe you'll fill it with something right great so now i'm starting my class beautiful so what are we doing here says that torah this is written in messily sharim the path of the just it answers like this hashem a person was only created for one reason to enjoy from god that sounds good great why did god created you just as when you're hungry you need to eat god is so good he created you in order to give you because i'm good but i need someone to give to right that's how it works this is what god created you what's the world to come you ever heard this idea of the world to come hola is being attached to the ultimate source of goodness what am i gonna do there i'm gonna be attached to gold because if i'm attached to gourd i have everything you don't have money you married us another millionaire you're set for life you know kate middleton's life that's good right so what is the world to come i'm gonna be attached to god and join from his goodness so then you should ask me but raquel you're saying i was created in order to have pleasure do you walk around and you see people do they look happy to you ever notice this you know what's that movie was that movie do i look happy to you what's that movie i forgot it oh no with kirsten dunst whatever i forgot this movie what it was but the point is do you see do you look around and you see people look happy yeah i don't know no i was like god you created me in order to have pleasure but it doesn't look like i'm having so much pleasure maybe a little bit you know but not not real pleasure you know there was a song that came out this year i'm sure you know it because it's the number one song after let it go from frozen you know but this is the number one song every single country in the world made a video about this song who knows which song i'm talking about happy because i'm happy clap along if you feel like happy hope men are not watching this video because i'm just singing along whatever okay so the point is right why did it became such a hit you ever thought about this you know what that song is about the song is about being happy for no reason shouldn't we always be happy doesn't matter why you know why the song is such a big hit this is the ugly truth because no one ever made a song about being happy for no reason except for if you're happy and you know it clap your hands that's pretty much the only other song that talks about happiness i started thinking about this and i'm like oh my god that's so depressing there's no thing no one ever thinks you should just be happy you know because people are not happy why maybe we're just doing the wrong uh search for happiness you ever think about this by the way what do you think you would need in order to be happy according to world standards and values money fame yeah uh honor and materialistic pleasure who has all of these things celebrities is there anyone that's more unhappy than celebrities the other day i was in the gym whenever i'm in the gym always tv comes out and i see something i've never seen this show because i think it's the most stupid show on the planet but i was changing it and it happened to me i saw two minutes of it thank you god for allowing me to see how polluted the world is i'm sorry if you like this show and i'm just going to ruin it for you but whatever that's like you know ugly truth it was the creations anyone ever seen the show okay so i have to tell you this i was so like disgusted by this there was kim kardashian that just got married or something like that with her friend and they were talking about going pool dancing i was like really you go paul dancing when you're married like what the heck get alive and the mother came down the mother of kim kardashian how did she this lady is probably like at least 50. she likes decorations i just insulted her right but this lady is at least 50 years old so she comes out and she's like so you girls what you talking about and they're like oh you we're gonna go pole dancing you want to come and kim is like really inviting vermont to compile dancing with us whatever and the ladies like sure just let me go change she goes change two minutes this is all i needed she was wearing a leotard or something like this with heels this size she was going paul dancing with her daughter no one else thinks this is disgusting just me because this is weird and then she kept on saying how cool she is because she knows how to enjoy life even when she's 50. how depressing is that you know it looks like everyone that's looking for happiness is not looking in the real place because they're unhappy you know how you know because a happy person doesn't need to be outrageous and do more and more and more a happy person is satisfied he doesn't need much more to be happy so the question is god you brought me into this world in order to have pleasure but it doesn't look like i'm getting it so why am i here so god says pleasure is for the world to come in this world you have to work hard so my real question right now is what am i doing here you want to know you want to know okay fine no one is yelling cause fine okay so what am i really doing here so the question i'm gonna address is what am i doing in this world i'm gonna give you two answers then i'm gonna cancel them then i'm gonna give you answer number three and that's the answer but i need to say the first two great works well she likes me so i'm gonna look at you she's making me happy i'm joking all of you make me happy but she's just smiling so much okay because she likes relation also but the point is so reason number one why am i here great girls like this by the way if you understand what i'm gonna tell you right now your perspective in life will change a hundred percent and you'll pretty much understand everything that goes on when the you'll understand everything everything is gonna change for you so listen very well to what i'm gonna say because in a general category it answers pretty much everything so it goes like this reason number one why am i here if god will put you in the world to come and give you ultimate pleasure you would live from something that we call the bread of shame yeah because god gave you pleasure for free and we know that no pain no gain the more that you work hard for something the more you value it yes or no 100 you could never compare working hard to just getting something for free even though in this generation we like being comfortable would you ever want to marry someone that's 45 and still living and supported by his parents no right if they give you some gifts maybe you'll just stay quiet for a little bit but you don't want this you want someone that knows how to work hard someone that knows how to earn life it's about earning the harder you work the more you enjoy imagine the first guy that ever clown mount everest so he climbed the highest mountain the most difficult there's a discussion which one he's at the top of mount everest and there's like someone waiting to interview him the haggai in the helicopter the interviewer whatever five people are on top of mount everest looking down who do you think is enjoying the view the most who do you think that one that climbed no comparison they're all looking at the same thing but they're not really one of them sees his effort you know like miley cyrus says not that i really like her but i think this song is amazing it's my favorite song life is a climb but the view is amazing that's life by the way just to add this i'm not saying this as a joke but imagine you were training for the olympics who's the person that you hate the most while you're training your coach your trainer who's the person that you love the most when you win the trainer guess what god is training you this is why sometimes you're not really happy with it but i want to tell you a little secret you never know what you're capable of doing until you're pushed to the limits do you ever so god is training you i'm pushing you to the limits because it brings you to a new recognition of who you really are this is why your life is so hard because i'm building myself and i'm getting somewhere and therefore i need to push myself and god says if you're not gonna push you i'm gonna push you but there's nothing like effort and gaming and there's nothing like that and that's what you're doing here by the way i do want to tell you something in this world people think that comfortable equals pleasure yeah now let me ask you a logical question do you have things that your father your parents and your great-grandparents never thought about having yes or no would you say they were probably happier than you yes or no 100 this generation oh my god whenever i'm teaching a group of jewish girls i always ask them what are your story forty percent of jewish girls always study psychology aren't you worried you're not gonna have clients no everyone is depressed how could it be we have so much you know my nieces and nephews are like millionaires if you don't take them to like chuck e cheese to spend some money you have chuck e cheese in england oh my god you've been deprived dave and buster something like that we don't have it in paramount but you know we go to america a lot okay whatever but my nieces and nephews live in mexico anyways but the point is nowadays i'm sure you could see this with your nieces and nephews if you don't do something that requires spending money they're not happy you used to go to the park and be happy you know you used to go right your bicycle would be happy nowadays you need like xbox playstation play whatever and then like 15 000 iphones you know to be happy why we don't know what it means to work hard and therefore we don't derive enjoyment anymore not only that i want to tell you a real idea we came into this world in order to have pleasure yeah how do i get pleasure pleasure comes from feeling a lacking yes or no when you have a lacking and you feel it you derive pleasure therefore listen to a real rule in life comfortable doesn't equal pleasure but rather pain equals pleasure because if pleasure comes from feeling unlacking then the greater the lacking the greater the enjoyment you heard this i'll say it again the greater the lacking the greater the enjoyment if i touch my husband every day do i get so excited believe me no one does but if you touch him two weeks a month every time you touch you know you know that song baby it's like five it works right you get so excited because you haven't touched him for like two weeks you know if you eat a chocolate every day do you enjoy the chocolate if you have it once a month you know it's like wow that's why we all love fasting in yom kippur because then you have all this food waiting for you afterwards right so it was only because i spoke about kim kardashian no i'm joking right so what is the deal the deal is like this the greater the lack the greater the enjoyment by the way if you understand this you'll appreciate your lackings because if it wasn't because you lacked something you wouldn't be able to enjoy it so much afterwards right you waited much more than your friend to get married but i could guarantee you that you appreciate your husband much more guaranteed you waited much more than someone to get have children or you didn't have so much money growing up you appreciate everything right the greater the lacking the greater the enjoyment therefore reason number one why am i here i'm here to work hard the more i work hard the more i enjoy it no pain no gain by the way this is what all i'm about is you guys know hebrew yes no maybe okay it doesn't matter anyways i'll put this here so it looks like i'm teaching something great the word olam in hebrew comes from the word elam which means hidden why is the world called olam because who's hiding here god he's playing hide and seek you see him you don't i'll tell you why he's hiding later right haba could also mean to come yeah you could say the world to come or habakkuk something like inside taboo inside come inside what's the world to come listen to it's beautiful the world to come is what's hidden inside whatever you build for yourself that's what you're going to enjoy you remember the story of the three little piggies one made a house out of wood one made a house out of straw one made a house out of brick was it a punishment when the wolf came and blew the house wasn't a punishment it was a consequence if you never built anything you could never enjoy from anything by the way i do want to tell you something by definition physical pleasure it doesn't matter how much you have it's never complete pleasure why because physicality is limited this is why all these people looking for happiness that way they're not enjoying it by definition only spiritual pleasure could be real pleasure why because spirituality is unlimited but i need to develop a sense to enjoy that pleasure could you ever explain to a blind person what color is blue yes or no never why would you say it's a mixture between purple and red but he doesn't know what's purple and red some of us are blind when it comes to spirituality and therefore even if it would hit us on the face we wouldn't enjoy it and therefore god says learn how to enjoy learn how to work for it and you there's no pleasure like that moving on reason number two why am i here great could you ever enjoy fully from something you don't know yes or no could you ever enjoy fully from something you don't know imagine you take two children to disneyland one of them knows every disney movie right one of them doesn't know anything what do you think it's enjoying disneyland much more a hundred percent you go to disneyland with me my husband goes crazy i'm like looking at the princess show and i get so excited and i make a line to going through the kitty rides of like ariel's grotto and bill's enchanted tail and my husband is like really you're putting me here and you make so much money we're going through every single ride you're joking i'm like no i'm not and the whole time whenever there's a show he's like raquel please do not volunteer do not volunteer do not want to do he's just i'm having the best time ever i want to see every show everything because i i love disney yeah remember when you went to a concert and you didn't knew the artist either you were high or your friend was high or someone was high that's pretty much what they do at this trance concert tavichi what do i call them how much could you bang your head that's why everyone's like hi you know but the point is right the more you know something the more you enjoy it there was a guy that came to his rabbit and said rabbi i want to find holiness so the rabbi said do you want to find holiness you need to go to a holiest place on earth the hotel or how you call it the koizen so the guy goes all the way to the coiso he spent three thousand dollars and then he comes back and he says rabbi i did not find any holiness so that rami said how could it be everyone wants a piece of that wall how could it be you didn't find any holiness so the guy says i don't know but why but i want my money back guaranteed you know it's a good jew so the rally says i give your money back one condition i want you to go outside and look for kakushkas bring me kakushkas i give you your money back so a guy goes like what is that russian what are you talking about you know so the rabbi said bring me kakushkas and i'll give your money back so the guy says rabbi how do you explain me to find kakushkas if i don't even know what they are so that rabbi answers him do you know what holiness is how do you expect to find holiness if you don't know what it is guess what what's the world to come it's total attachment to god but if i don't know god can i ever enjoy from him no because i don't know him therefore what did i come to in this world reason number two i came to get to know god because the more that i know god the more i enjoy from him when do you love your partner the most when you're newlywed or when you're married for 40 years if the marriage is going well 40 years when you're newlywed you think you know what love is i could tell you no love it's just like butterflies i mean it's the most fake thing ever when you're married even though you're fighting every single day you know you suddenly develop love why because the rule in life is like this the more you know the more you love love is directly proportional to knowledge this is why you love much more one direction that you love carlos santana or something like that because you don't even know what that guy is right the more you know the more you love therefore the more that i get to know god the more that i get to fall in love with him but listen to this it's not only not enough to get to know god i need to get to be like god you know how people always say i you only appreciate your parents when you become a parent because now you see everything they did all the effort that they did all the sacrifice the more that you develop in yourself qualities that you appreciate in others the more that you appreciate it in them people that have good sense of humor always fight each other and you're like why are they laughing and you're just like yeah you know no because you don't have it so it's not in you you know but when you develop something in yourself that others have you appreciate it much more so guess what we're really doing here we're really getting to get to know god and be like god by definition you know how i become my god by perfecting myself what does it mean to perfect myself to get to be godly i'm gonna tell you an idea again you think about what i'm gonna say right now everything in your life changes perspective every day there was once a roman guy that came to rabia akiva you ever heard of rabbi akiba famous rabbi he said like this rabbi akiva doesn't it saying your torah that god is good so god is great i love him listen to us so the roman guy said if god is so good why did he create poor people ever ask this question good question no if god is so good why did he create a poor people listen to the answer he said like this god created poor people in order to allow the rich to give beautiful what's the quality the essential quality that defines gold he's a giver yeah that's why he created you to give good to you but in order to give there needs to be someone in the other side to receive so that's why god created you with so many lackings so that you could give to each other but by doing that you become like god do people grow more from easy life or from hard lives hard lives sometimes you see people that have a horrible life but they shine why because they chose to grow from that and they became like god if you understand this you'll be thankful to your family that drives you crazy because they allow you to work on your weaknesses and you'll be thankful to your husband if there's someone that is ever gonna drive you crazy it's your husband you know how they say opposite attracts it doesn't mean that you like different things no no it means like when you were caught you were caught like this you know and therefore everything he has you need to fix everything you have he needs to fix imagine having someone reminding you all day about everything you're not good at that's a horrible thing but at the same time only when you're married could you perfect yourself because you're put in a situation that you always have to push yourself to be better because you want to be a good wife and you want to give to each other it's the best thing in the world but you know it's hard work you know how in the movies they always say and they live happily ever after and the movie is gone you know why because they don't want to show you what happens next first fight you know guaranteed but if i understand that i came into this world in order to be like god in order to give then would i appreciate so much my husband and allows me to give to him yes or no yes would i think of myself giving him a favor no who's doing a favor to whom the rich to a poor or the poor to a rich the poor to the rich because the poor allow the rich to give if you understand this your whole life comes into perspective one day i went to rami levi ramilev it's like the number one supermarket in israel great i like it i mean i think it's the number one but you know usher adam i think it's competition so don't tell them i say anything so it's two big supermarkets for religious people whatever so i'm in primary i work like 24 hours a day so of course when do i go shopping at night it was the night before pesach it's like the movie twas before christmas you know whatever the night before peza could you imagine how much people were in the supermarket i cannot explain to you you have to wait for parking and for someone to empty up their cart in order to be able to do anything so i'm standing there in line to pay for an hour and a half okay now ramulev is really nice sometimes they hire people that have a disability in order to pack your bags which i think it's really nice because it allows them to be independent but in my opinion a cashier should know math like this is a must you're a cashier you know so i'm standing in a line there's three people in front of me the guy that's paying i am not joking he paid 2676 shekels but he gave her 300 checklists this is easy math how much you have to give back don't answer in case you're gonna say it incorrectly right you have to give back 24 seconds that's hard no the lady didn't know how to count i'm not joking she counted it all the way to 300 shekels to make sure there were 300 and then she counted 276 shekels right and then she took it out this took her more than half an hour you have to add to this that israelis have a quality called hutzpah you know what it is they do not care what you think and everyone likes to get on each other's business i think it's a good thing because if not they would never move forward because this is like a small country and we need to push ourselves but sometimes it's like crazy so the guy in my cashier starts yelling at the ladies so everyone else starts yelling at him to stop yelling and you do not know this was like jumanji crazy everyone's like yelling at each other so right now i'm thinking what are you gonna do suddenly i realize this lady speaks spanish i'm like oh my god if she knows i speak spanish she's gonna be showing bears what should i do everyone in my line started leaving so now i have a choice if i leave the line i number one will embarrass this lady number two it might cost her her job yeah because no one wants to hire a cashier like this so i decided this was a test made for raquel patience is not my virtue you know i'm one of these people please say you're like me so i don't have to feel so bad counting for me it's like math i could do like multiplications of like five digits and like i'm not joking i i could play bagan you know when you're playing bagan with people you know what's bagaman please tell me you play this in england great and there's black and white i don't know it's like counting one two three and you're like there's black and white because it's uneven it's not so hard you know what i'm talking about and then when you're playing romney cube and they pick up 14 pieces and they go one two and you're like oh my god just stack them up who's like me please right so i was standing there and i'm like oh my god god just sent this test to me because this is how i'm going to fix myself i played a little bit of candy crush that helped to kill some time because it was an hour and a half i decided to call everyone in my phone is to wish them yomtov samaya you know but i left ramy levy feeling like i passed my test and everyone else probably left angry you know if you understand that you came to be like god you'd appreciate every opportunity to work on yourself and your whole perspective in life changes by the way when god created man listen to this that pasuk says like this and god said let's make man what's wrong with this quote let's make man what's wrong now i say adam it should have said let yeah beautiful that's my friend over there why does it say let's make man so rashi the main commentary says an idea it's not the one i want but anyways i'll tell you because general culture rashi said that god wanted to teach you humility therefore he humbled himself to consult with the angels to create man in order to teach humility whenever i think of this i'm like wow god humbled himself to teach you to be humble crazy but you know what i'd say let's make man you know what i'd say let's make man right because in reality you know what god is saying let's make money you and i i'm gonna give you a body i'm gonna give you a soul i'm gonna give you talents you need to make a man out of that this is why when god created human being it doesn't say and god so it was good because guess what you're not good the way you were created your work under construction and it's okay to make mistakes but i need to know that i came here to grow this is why god made you out of the earth you know what's the earth main quality fertility everything you put on it grows we want to grow not this way this way we want to grow this is why we're not growing we're not happy because we're going against our nature so reason number two why am i here in the world i came to get to know god and to get to be like because the more that i am like god the more that i enjoy him one time there was a guy working on metal so now you work on metal you heat it up right so that his kid came and said daddy how long are you gonna heat up the metal for so the father answered until i could see my reflection on it then i know it's pure have you ever met people that you could see god's reflection on them i bet you there were people that didn't have easy lives you ever met a father that had a child with a disability right you wouldn't want this test it's a hard test but would you want to be a father like that yes or no a hundred percent right you came into this world in order to mirror god's image but now let's do reason number three so i'm gonna cancel everything i said right so get on it so i said we came into this world in order to not live from the bread of shame yeah but now so what are we doing here we're earning the world to go so the hobo the famous book called duties of the heart ask a question could you ever really earn the world to come because imagine before coming to his world you owed the world to go yeah now that you came here not only do you owe the world to chrome you also owe this world because if someone gives you 20 how much do you owe them 20. someone gives you 100 100. imagine how much do you owe gourd that every second he's giving you life health family friends clothing shoes shoes shoes shoes you know how i go right how much do you think you owe him everything says that this is not a good business deal before i came here i only owed the world to go now that i'm here i also owe this world so what are we doing here so says that an amazing thing you might say that you came to earn it how by doing meets vote we know what mitzvot is the commandments listen to this because if it wouldn't be written you wouldn't believe this that is like this in the future a voice is going to come out of mount the temple mount and it's going to say like this right anyone that ever kept a commandment come and request for your reward so you're going to say god i kept shabbat you're going to say god i kept kashrut you're going to say god i put a messouza in my house or a mezuzah whatever god i did a bris mila but it's me last circumcision yeah listen to it and then god is gonna say did anyone ever put a messouza before i gave them a house did anyone ever circumcise their child before i gave them a child stop one moment not stop don't think about it stop think about it you ever notice this there's nothing god ever requests from you until he gave you something greater before you ever notice this nothing anything god ever asked for you it's only after he gave you something a thousand times greater but you never notice what you give what you get you only notice what you give this is why we're not happy imagine someone that doesn't have children and they just come and they say oh you want to have a child just circumcise him are you joking give me 15. you know go god doesn't ask you to put a message if you don't have a house you don't have to circumcise a child if you don't have a child but god gave you a huge gift he's only asking for a little bit one time in the gym i was watching extreme makeover home edition anyone has seen the show my favorite show we started late right so i was watching the show there was a couple that didn't have dishes yeah why because their house was falling apart so when they remodeled the house they got dishes they were so happy to have this because now they could use them i started thinking i love this show it makes me appreciate everything i have i started thinking about every single person that complains about washing dishes you know what's a dish listen to it it's number one a dish you have number two a person in your family number three a person you're able to feed isn't that a beautiful dish you know people that live on the street they never do laundry would you want to be them no is the glass have empty or half full half empty and half full have empty you'll be depressed have full you'll be happy forever or like my students said you'll be you should be happy you have a glass to fill there's nothing god ever requests from you without giving you something great at first but now let's take it now i'm going to give you the answer right listen to us so we said we came into this world in order to earn the world to come but i could never really earn it and i might say but hello i'm doing so many me truth yeah but there's no mitzvah you could ever do if god doesn't give you a chance so what are we really doing here so now let's define terms what does it mean to live from the bread of shame yeah shame it means when something someone gives you something and you don't even know them right let's say you're birmingham someone doesn't have a family and someone gives them money to pay for their wedding are they embarrassed yes or no of course because i don't know you right how embarrassed do you get depends on two things how big is the gift that i'm getting and how much of a stranger is the person giving me the gift yes or no 100 but now let's say your best friend or your husband comes home on your birthday and doesn't give you a gift are you okay with that it is hello and goodbye forever you know because when you love someone and you know someone loves you not only do you want to get you expect to get and even though you told your husband and your friend no i don't need anything in your mind you're really considering they're making you a huge surprise party and giving you 15 000 gigs you know so this is not a good business deal by the way just want you to know problems of communication when a man hears something that's what he hears a woman when she says something there's like subtitles i don't want anything but really i don't want to ask you but i want you to think about it man hears she doesn't want anything great let's save money just so you know by the way right by the way how good is a gift depends on two things how much money the person giving you the gift has yeah and how close he is to you yeah your rich uncle will give you something better than your uncle just a question is there anyone that loves you more than god is there anyone that has more to give you than god he chose the torah maybe you should check it out check it out check it out yeah but now that it's really finished now i'm giving you the last punching line yeah if i would have been put in the world to come from the beginning i would have been embarrassed forever because there's the biggest stranger giving me the biggest ultimate pleasure so i would have been embarrassed forever because who are you god that you're giving me the world to come but now that i came into this world could i ever earn the world to come no because how could you ever pay back but you know what you could earn you could earn a relationship and when there is a relationship there's no shame because not only do you want to get you expect to get how much the stronger your relationship is the more you want to get and how do i build that relationship you may ask says that zohar from the moment god created the world he hid himself and said i want to have a relationship with you but i can't force myself into you i want you to want to have a relationship with me god says i want to have a relationship with you but i can't force myself i want you to want me listen to this says that's so hard from the moment god created the world he hid himself and he said i'm only coming in if you're inviting me you know how do we invite god whenever we do a mitzvah we're inviting god you put a messouza on your house you say go thank you so much for giving me a beautiful house come in be part of it you're saying a blessing on your food god thank you so much for feeding me come be part of it you're doing a brief mila god thank you so much for giving me a baby be part of it and the more that you connect to god the stronger your relationship is and the less shame there is i just finished with this story i promise you there was a convert that checked out every single religion and then he found out he wanted to be jewish so someone came to him and asked why did you like judah is a matter of everything what is it from judaism that picked you up you know so he said the way that jewish people tie up their shoes you ever heard this there's a jewish way to tie up your shoes you put your right shoe then you put your left shoe then you tie up your left shoe then you tie up your right shoe easy mitzvah right left tie up left tie up right so the guy looks at him and he says really this is what you like about judaism there was nothing else better you know like there's like purim hanukkah whatever tang up your shoes listen to the answer because it sums up everything the guy says you don't understand a god that wants to be with me even when i'm putting up my shoes that's a god i want to have a relationship with when you love somebody you know you want to be with them all day god loves you so much he wants to be with you even when you're putting on your shoes welcome to judaism