Tisha B'av: Rebuilding the Temple with Love - Rabbi Yitzchok Fingerer

[Music] it's exceedingly upsetting that we're observing yet another tishu I was so prayerful I was so hopeful last year that it would be the last tishu and that today would be a yff but alas here we are observing yet another tisho and truthfully it's a condemnation and it's an indictment against us because the same disunity and the same fragmentation and divisiveness that plagued us last year and for hundreds and thousands of years previous plagued us this year it's enough enough we need Tish to be a Yanti how's it going to happen the torist says about the revoltion about God it describes him as h God the Majestic the grand the awesome Mighty God how is he so mighty Majestic Grand and awesome the Torah clarifies the Torah explicates the Torah explains precisely what it means it says I because God cares about the dejected the lonely God cares about those who others don't care about the orphan the Widow and he loves the convert The Stranger and he clothes him that means that God's greatness is in taking care of none other than the disenfranchised the estranged those who no one else cares about those that are different those that are removed those that are isolated tells us said wherever you find God's grandor and majesty and might and awesomeness sh that's where you find God's loneliness that's where you find God's humility you want to know where to find God's greatness it's in the loneliness and humility says the holy Rover raakel ROV what does it mean k what does it mean the place that you find this greatness there convergence that you find is loneliness he says the grandor the greatness of God means that you take God's name the sh the Tetra the and you exemplify you square it each of the letters the yud the hey the V if you square the yud it's 100 if you square the hey it's 25 if you square the VB it's 36 and again if you square the hey it's 25 you add that up it's 186 the precise Gat of H God's place but says a ren of something so beautiful listen clearly he says you want to find where God truly is what God's greatness really lies his loneliness his humility his ability to be there for everyone no matter what they look like no matter how they behave and that's why he says that if you look in the Torah and the Zar says this and it's brought down the as well as there are seven times in the in the five books of the Torah that you have minuscule miniature letters there are three occurrences there are three incidences of this in sa barous there are two in vayikra there's one in bbar and one in the three imperious are and then you have in V you have the small Olive of you have the small me of M you have byar the little of Pinas and you have in the small minuscule tiny letter of tesi the yud says the Rover if you add these all up if you take the hey take the take the K take the olive take the me take the yud and take the Y it adds up to 186 the M the shame of a because God's Grandeur his majesty his awesomeness his might his greatness lies in the small and the puny and the little and the dejected and those that have no one else what does that mean that means us Isel the children of Israel the Jewish people God's children and we supposed to imitate God we're supposed to replicate his ways that means that if you take care of others if you reach out to others who haven't been ignited yet who have been written off it look like they're assimilating or if you reach out to others who need a who need a kindness who need to be uplifted who need strength then you are like Hashem but we we're too judgmental we're too pretentious we're noals we're holier than now we Domin in shoes where we have our clicks we hang out with the people who socioeconomically are the ones that pass appropriate for us that's not what Hashem wants Hashem wants Unity Hashem wants peace Hashem wants us to stop discriminating and to start understanding that we're Brethren we're brothers and sisters you know the Torah says about mh's Sons he had two sons says gam his first son was gam so what should the Torah say the Torah should say elzar and the second one's name was it doesn't say that it seems to be a discrepancy because it says it says he had one son and the Second Son it says and he had another single son why does it say say and the Second Son it says he had one son and he had one son the great rabbie shamun Samson raful h says that if you contrast this and contr distinction to the animals to the carbon tumble where it speaks about the kevis the shepel of the sheep it says AAS Hasen the second animal because when it comes to children when it comes to a Jew when it comes to your brother he's not a statistic he's not the second or the third or the fourth when it comes to your child you have many children each child is precious each Jew each brother's unique and distinct and privileged and each encounter with another Jew should be as if your first and last encounter with that person that person is so extraordinary that person is so special they are the they are the one and only I share with you a story that happened there was a fellow of that went to his rebba the SAR sh of bells and he said to the bells are the holy bells of rebba he said I would like to have giloi I'd like to have the revelation of Elijah the prophet of ooh he felt that he was on that caliber he felt that he was holy and that he had rectified himself and engaged in a lot of self-perfection and the rebit said to him for 40 days I want you to engage in certain special practices should fast go to Mikvah and learn in the B smish every single night throughout the entire night deprive yourself of the Sleep learn and then after this regimen after this special prescription you will encounter none other than ELO noi and theid very devoutly he did it for 40 days he followed the exact regimen and prescription to the tea and he was learning every single night so so piously with such consumate devotion and then was last night the last night and he was so anxious he was going to greet Ali but there was a knock on the door of the smish and he was interrupted he didn't want to be interrupted he wanted to encounter he wanted to have the revelation of Leo who was disturbing him who was the stranger and the person persistently knocked and was aggravating him finally he goes to the door and he sees a sloly looking person and the person said please will you talk to me will you learn with me and he looked at the person person looked miserable and he said to the person I'm sorry I can't please leave me I'm engaged in something so important so critical let me be leave me alone and the man left upset and disappointed the next morning the hassard went to his Rebel he said Rebel Rebel I don't understand I followed your instructions precisely what happened where was oo and the rebba said you sawo he came to you in middle of the night he knocked in the door you threw him out every person you cter may be yaho it may be your Redemption every person that you engage and encounter treat with dignity and respect treat with avas is RO with love you don't know brisar ROV velv asks why is it that immediately after the Torah is given which portion do we read read the portion about the Evy about the man who stole and has to be rehabilitated he's sold into slavery asks the brisker of couldn't the Torah give you something more palatable couldn't it give you something more noble after all you're so exalted and this is what we have to read about says the BR precisely yes the torah's message is that every Jew counts no matter what condition he's in now no matter how he has lapsed and slipped and fall doesn't make a difference the message of the Torah immediately after it's given is that don't become too sanctimonious don't become so holier than now that you think that you have an advantage over someone else no no no there's an Evy every Jew must be salvaged every Jew should have the attention the love and the patience I'll share with you some stories that riderman schle the shear fascinating stories there was once malom a teacher of Jewish children and this teacher of Jewish children was very punctual he was so fastidious and meticulous and arriving to yiba to Theon time he was never late never late one day one day something went arai and his order got out of whack the schedule and he realized that he was going to arrive late toer and he tried his hardest not to arrive late and he really tried to expedite things and he even called a taxi and he spent extra money to get him on time to theer when he finally arrived he was almost hyperventilating he couldn't catch his breath he rushed so much and he sits there and the the children are looking at him and one child one child goes ahead and sticks out a watch that was on a wristband that was on his arm and is pointing it and showing it to the malami to the rebi to the teacher the rebi looked and the rebi was infuriated he couldn't understand look the audacity how could this boy do that I rushed my kishkas what I did to get here and I got here within five minutes and that kid has the goal to try to give me muser and just show me a watch he was going to Harang this kid he was so so so infus iated and I rate mad but he had a cabala had a tradition that if something upset him he always allowed a half an hour half an hour to pass before he reacted to quell and to mify the emotion which he did at recess time the teacher had already forgotten the incident but the little boy with the watch came over to his teacher and he said Reby I must show you something this is a gift that I've been waiting for the longest time for my mother and she finally was able to afford it she finally gave it to me I worked so hard to achieve this gift look reie I wanted you to be the very first one to see that my mother gave me a new watch and as soon as you came in I was trying to show you but I think you were distracted Reby looked what I got and the teacher realized that the boy wasn't trying to chastise or rebuke him wasn't trying to put him in his place the boy just wanted to show him a new gift could you imagine could you imagine what would have happened had the reing Lost himself and not shown patience and not understood that we have to dignify and cherish every person unfathomable unbelievable shadon the famous mid when he started off his career as a Magid he would lecture in the and he would start off his lecture with the with some humor some justest in order to captivate in order to Intrigue and enthral the crowds that they should listen to the different muser there were were several people in the audience though that were Cano that were zealots and they felt that it was inappropriate and it wasn't supas for Dron to start off with a Gest with a joke with humor it diminished they felt from the sanctity from the Holiness of the sheir and therefore they went to him and they felt that they should rebuke him tell him that he shouldn't do it or sh Dron felt conflicted he didn't know what to do he traveled all the way to Ben BR to visit none other than the K is to consult with K he told the K his dilemma he said he felt torn after all he was trying to entice everyone to Listen by starting off as the gamorra says with a joke with something a little um humorous and the K said you must continue in that d I don't care what they say I don't care if they lbas you you're doing what's exactly appropriate and said he said Elita there was no shortage of great rabbis of Y but people that have fear of heaven and me Scholars he said and look what happened look how many from the generation went ahead and went aunder and became totally totally fry left the religion left the fold why he said because yes there was fear of Heaven yes there was scholarship there was piety but there wasn't Sim there wasn't Joy there wasn't that vitality and vivaciousness that wasn't that exuberance and exhilaration he says if that's what you're giving that's what the generation needs the famous quote desperate times require Desperate Measures Our Generation every everybody we all need Sim we need people to approach us with love and joy to make us feel included in their lives to make us feel including their Community to be uplifted to be elevated to be instilled with the joy with the happiness theb used to tell a story about R kaminka Hala kaminka Rebel one time there was a man that came to him and the man said said that his wife is so wretched she's so miserable he said please rebba I'd like you to give a br or rather curse that she should die the Reb was appalled the Reb was astonished toally this incredulous the Reb said I can never harm another Jew is but I could advise you shab says that for the sin of the lack of fulfillment of vows for the sin of people who make pledges who make commitments and vows tragically rahl their wives die he says I encourage you to make a vow for the construction of magnificent mikah here in town now he knew that the man he's talking to is a very frugal and stingy man and the man said absolutely all of a sudden he was very motivated to give charity he says and the plan was that he wouldn't fulfill the V and then tragically something terrible would happen to his wife a very very strange story time passes and his wife is still alive he rushes to sh kaminka and he says I don't understand she's here she's thriving what happened and shom said you know theam B says have Z here that a person should be very very Vigilant very very careful to honor his wife he says you know he says apparently God doesn't consider this woman to be yours because you haven't treated her with respect and dignity and therefore she's not dying as a result of your forsaken vow why don't you treat her like a wife and be Z here be careful to respect her and then everything will happen the man heard this he went home for the first time ever he started dignifying he started cherishing and valuing his wife kamay P upon him as a reflection in turn she started valuing him the relationship metamorphosis transformation they were blossoming and flourishing all of a sudden the woman gets deathly ill the man the husband is mortified and devastated he runs to the rebel he says Rebel do something do something she's dying and the Reb said it's very simple just fulfill your vow build that Mikvah and he built the MF and the Reb used to joke he said Not only was I successful making sh B but I also got a new mcf for the town what's the moral of the story the moral of the story is that the man the husband when he started valuing his wife and heeding her attention and caring for her she no longer felt isolated she no longer felt distrained she no longer felt different you know so often in life we don't get along with people it could be family in-laws neighbors whoever it is so often we don't get get along because we just haven't made the Overture we haven't made the effort to really connect and if we just make that little initiation we reach out a little they feel dignified they feel validated they feel important they feel included then in turn reciprocity they make you feel wonderful and special and that's what we're lacking today there's too much of a bridge there's too much of a Chasm there's too much of a gap that divides us from others there's that lack of unity that lack of sh the lack of peace and Tish comes long and Tish reminds us got to get your act together enough is enough there's so much tragedy there's so much suffering we don't need it and the Cure the solusion the Panacea is so simple unite love one another take care of one another so let me just give you a few concrete steps to share with you there's somebody in your neighborhood who has been exposed to light of Torah make them feel part of things greet them invite them shower them with attention and love if there's somebody in the family that you think is a little different may not be on your religious level invite them over spend time with them Revel in their presence this brings us together this unifies on a communal level have a suggestion just a suggestion we have a couple who you don't know but they were both raised in very secular families that were very estranged from ybe from Judaism and the parents very hostile towards the growth in Judaism but Against All Odds defying all the opposition and all the hostility they've blossomed to become true true Torah Jews Ben Torah and they're getting married but they have no support you'll say well I don't know them but that's not what we're spelling today we're saying that the solution the answer is TI isov is you don't know them but they yours they're part of you and therefore you have a Monumental opportunity to help make their wedding to contribute to be M to partner in this and in the of us reaching out to others with love dignifying others validating others making sure that every person that we encounter we uplift and we show our humility we show how much we care about those those that are unfortunate that downtrodden that are dejected that don't feel part of our community and we make every person feel like they shame or make every person feel that they are the one and only and that Merit may we speedily see the G of the Redemption theam s says that the difference between the Third Temple and the previous two temples the previous two temples there was a mdash l and there was a mdash Lata there was a temple above in the heavens in the firmaments and the there's one on below and ground he says but the third there will be no sh shayam he says because we will through love we will so saturate the world with love and so imbue and permeate the world with love that we will take the entire bayi that's up there and bring it down so that we will have the full the entire for the first time in the history of the world the B will be the entire sh there will not be even a vestage or Remnant left of the upstairs and that's what we look forward to may it happen speedily in our days amen thank