What Is Real Friendship? - Likkutei Torah "Atem Nitzavim" # 2

the yeshiva dotnet okay we're at the end of the first paragraph so moisture Ave new summons the Jewish people Rashi says that Adam it's of him happened on the day of his death which means it was I another the Zohar as we mentioned sees it as a remand for every Rosh Hashana and Moshe I mean who says Optimates of him how um Kulthum of national location today you stand before our Shem and he goes through the ten categories of Jews were safe from shift Asians Ignatian saturation coil is she throw tap gonna shake from Jericho cultivates essa odd sure you've me man ten categories of Jews and all of them stand together the flesh I'm allocation and this was the explanation that on Rosh Hashana only suits a hummus are miss island they're elevated and they were meats of him they stand there traced back to their source lift nasheim allocation and despite the fact that there are so many different matter agus represented by the ten levels can negate the ten crisis a nephesh from Kozma through Malthus nonetheless they all unite this Asif Russia um Yahoo shifty Australia Dan kahan because the great clown in kedusha is no so from but he lost so with colossal be so fun that ultimately there's no Roshan there's no safe it's an eagle which comes from save of column and the Gomera says at the end of time is a sadhaka Deborah Colossus mockolate Sadiq him and what's a muscle a muscle is a circle that had the commands in a circle and Mary beds boy Juarez everybody from the position of the circle points and says that I once saw from the kedusha slavery did live it's a competitive right but did she rewrites the Gemara is rushing over there is also the College Board Colossus motionless addiction Hashem is going to make a Dan circle for that said did camp and he's gonna be in middle and everybody's gonna point their finger if I'm Mary Mary Beth's body volume is em tomorrow brings deposit he Nazy and what's the Russian he may lack a new Zack even Olivia she a news a Shannon Covino light Nagila Venus member schlossie that's the end of moussaka Steines so the asked about did Shiv asks what's the meaning of this metaphor of this illustration of this graphic illustration moments our Dickon so he says that by a circle there's no point where anybody is closer to the nucleus to the center than anybody else the diameters are the radius are equal so the water is throughout the generations you see a lot of different types of people and generally were compelled to create distinctions you're closer I'm further I'm closer he's further she's further all silicon is vertical in the future you're gonna see it's a Maha it's a mock-up and in a mock how there's no rush and there's no scythe there's no this person is close to this person is more distant in the real world of the divine is unity and therefore call F advocate everyone will be able to be Mary Birds by very Mirza even though his or her position and place in the market everybody has their place in the muscle but in the true world of kedusha there's no beginning and there's no end there's no top and there's no bottom and as he explains it here at length everybody needs the other person because in one Indian I am a Russian and another Indian I'm the safe and you're the right one in yin I'm the Rocha morning and I'm the raggle just like in a column as we discussed at length huh very much say you good yeah what he says one of the Samana members are shown is to eat their heads that of the fish the head of the ramp Nia Leroy the lobizon of right we should be on the head and not the tail so the shocked is that everybody should realize wherever you are in life you should realize that it's never in the plan of zone of you never a tail even though you look at your life and you say I'm azan off but under Shoshanna be sassafras a young Jakob 50 is through all the rush Shyam has he says all the my shoppers come together from Alma the prudent ila marketers and he finishes this paragraph tis pated about when he finishes Mazzello derrick club and this is derek clout meaning this is the general how could done with the general perspective of what moistures introducing according to desire that on the day of Rosh Hashana its oven my own cooking of Nash I'm allocation the cloud this felt and it's felt in all over the details this is the general summation of this in the code of the atlas of neshama sister all this is the CUDA number one dedica proud basil that are proud a hotel - but now we go from cloud to profit as always you start with cloud and then you go to Pratt claw is the overarching principle like you said before cloud goggle and kedusha is that there's no Roshan safe and sitter accurate there's always Russian safe there's always real real hierarchies in kedusha the hierarchies are functional they're important they're even vital career ax comes and says Kalle the coulomb good ocean i'ma do it it's not so I'll call a chamois also wanted to eliminate hierarchy but there's a big difference between what Curtis is saying and what this miner has saying micariff was saying is there's no moisture there's no wireless no coin goggled whoever wants he's not saying here that is no everyone has their mission and it's indispensable but essentially you shouldn't become arrogant and pompous we spoke about the look of disdain that the Baal Shem Tov discussed which sometimes tips to scale quite heavily in other that essentially it's not that you're superior and you're really really closer to the divine and the other person is just an insignificant piece of dirt or at best completely subservient to you in the real truth of Eliquis it's size of kalam and a malaria safe but of course every person has their unique mission their unique system whatever it is just like in a body you don't say the head might do it it's not so you don't turn to the brain and say the gun circle is hail it might do it is not so take the brain and throw it into the garbage who does the brain think it is and you know the next step is you might need a cover condition for that so the important idea is that not that there's no distinctions but the distinctions have to be seen from a perspective of once that if Pratt a who they really hold now to get in more to more than the protein how is this here hood happening this is all a cloud that there is a need for you and explaining why there is a need for you and how it works generally speaking but now he gets into more protein well now when you're not sure of alum but after Berta Shoshanna first of all how do you reach this consciousness of your Hut number one number two what is the concept of children that he discussed shuva means returning that the neshamah sister all returned and three fossa possession why from all the days of the year what happens in a time of Richard Shonda that we say that the woven usamos experience Coover that the Shama sister all returned to their own mucker to their own childish miss a safe Russia um all the marsh of is of kanessa sister all come from the fragmented world interior say often as discussed in the previous year yesterday why does your sana three questions how do you reach the secret what is true ver and wider Shoshanna be Eric us of Africa flow of recover bris for this moisture knob a new continues the next possible the way the structure of partisan at sovereign works is it opens up you stand today all of you before Shem and he says who he goes through ten categories why does he have to go through ten categories if he said colder than coal come is everybody wholesome means all of you why does he have to go through the categories but we understand why he has to go through the categories you shouldn't think that Colson is just then the kuda of the cloud no we go through all the details and everybody in the position of who they are as individuals mid-south my uncle of national occasion the vert is not that the wood shopper has an accrued that where he's a Jew and therefore we disregard the fact that he's a woodchopper today he's not a woodshop moisture knob ain't no includes the prot them in other words he unites cloudiest all with the details not by ignoring the details and just saying you know we're all recession and so we don't look at our individual identity together with individual identity he goes through all the prop them there are ten different colors this costume abena discusses where classicist all is divided nonetheless attributes of my uncle come with national occasion he brings in everything and he says that you have to understand is a Russian is a safe and nonetheless there's no Russian there's no safe despite the fact that loaded is a rotation in the cycle and is different our office you have to give special treatment to a coin yeah you don't say I'll call you in a lady's room there's a special is our dinner the key - toy a client has to be first comes to benching it comes to an alia comes talk of it I got stuck in a traffic jam on one of the streets so so it wasn't a month he was in Brooklyn so I'm Brooklyn everyone's work all very very uptight very intense because of the real estate situation over there so people are generally on edge so I was trying to go well another guy was trying to go it and so I stopped and I went like this so I open the window and he opened his window so he said no you go first so we got into an argument to his line first but in the meantime there were a hundred cars he was very very impatient beeping he says no I'm not going before you I want you to go first then I said I said to mr. Hart the key - tire kyon has two golfers is getting them canisters digging I can hurt you city so he went first there's a certain there's a certain a losses disa kyon visit a moussaka whatever it is in Halawa this our relation is a site we're talking about essentially a lane of a siphon the world of God essentially it's not an innate hierarchy which causes disdain or disregard or division or a sense of holier-than-thou or superiority complexes psychologically emotionally religiously spiritually so much' goes to all the product when he finishes the categories he says you're all standing here levira hubby briefs adonai alayich of Allah saw a shadow Nile AdvoCare simcard you're all here to pass through the bris the Covenant with Hashem and his oath that he is creating with you today LeMond how come I am Liholiho Lamonica boys kiyoung layla i'm to make you today his nation will he love color look him and he will be your God as he spoke to you and as he sworn and he said I'm not making this covenant with you alone with those who are here and with those who are not here so that by the time you says this is not just creating and telling them why they're standing here it's also a continuation to what we explained under sha Shan Ultimates of my uncles in love Nash I'm allocation but how do you reach the CFO and what is true ver and wider Shoshanna so that's what he continues well of recovery but it's all based on the ZOA that haeyo him even though physically that hanoi messiah nada but the zyre says that our pier MSRP site it includes also a message for the home of Rosh Hashanah which is area I'm Phyllis masa in the various layers of Toyota interpretation track grandma's versa for Indian explained this Kamala Marshall will take a metaphor of Schnee I have him two friends two beloved friends two people who love each other oh yeah shakers in Brisbane a.m. there's a concept where two best friends decide to make a bris to create a covenant of friendship between them select if sight of us for example dove it we have it in the Tanakh dove it and unison posit says the Tanakh tells us in school that doubled in unison were extraordinary friends and it was not an easy friendship because you're mrs. father was shawl hemella and show my mother because we know loathed of it he was threatened by done with he despised of it for whatever reason he wanted a killed of it and he was extremely infuriated that his son is so close to double that novice emeritus he tells the understand why are you protecting this man who's ultimately going to usurp your position is running the strip in royalty but the Gunnison remained loyal to dove it throughout to the point that when young listened was killed in worn by the Clifton shawl died and unison died governor mallow hewlet Jesus David and jointed - ole Anderson at the end of small olive the last chapters of small olive when he hears that unison died and David hemella says then NIF Lisa Vasa was an if Lisa boscola may averse notion mm Elif describes the love that he had to join us in that was unique something special in the world at some point the Tanaka says they made a bridge they made a covenant if I'm your best friend why do we have to make a covenant we love each other we like each other we have to make a bridge we're gonna make a document that we love each other could that forget that's gonna help that's gonna help doesn't work that way either you have emotions you don't have emotions if you don't have emotions no contract no bris and the world is gonna help but if you have emotions what do you need a blissful she explains as I said Kirsten brisbane names like Tiff's a kvass she lugar double shia through you boy Khayyam la decisión the Chris's Brisbane ale you see love is always triggered by something if that thing that created the love that camaraderie that we have that which we share if that would have endured forever you don't need a bris a little efficient your name there afraid somebody you've hooked a lot over that original bond that brought them together may one day cease Oh patella IVA and the love is going to go I shed my you grenades iminium of a hood maybe that factor will remain but somebody outside could mix it there's always somebody I'm tempted to say ash rigor what I don't want to say that but there's always some bit something from outside a simony amoeba hoods from outside could mix in and say who you know what he said about you can you see it constantly so two things can happen one thing is the periphery of it says tailored of our bottled of a pet Eliza if we became friends because of I don't know there was something I really appreciated about you that's times change you see it with marriages all the time we are husband and a wife appreciated something times change people change looks change situations change I say the reason I loved you is not here anymore I don't love you anymore it's time to move on the tale is over about the lila the same happens when between friends constantly you go in with somebody right in that for whatever reason there could be an external thing could be a very deep thing but it's over it's over the love is over or no it's not over but other things mixing in life other factors from outside mix in and they destroy the love they destroy the friendship what do you do about this now doubly then young innocent new this is gonna happen by day tradition Sabri is Tia vaasam ivanitsa is Baltimore Island vaudeville oh yeah freedom Schumann nearby summer house the concept of actresses Britta's creating a covenant which you already have with the Brisbane Apsara and partial answer is that they ensure that their love will be eternal ball tonight it will not falter forever and no minion no prevention no obstacle internally or externally we buy you some River Hood's will ever separate the question is how does this happen if it's there it's there it's not there it's not there it's a funny mechanism what will create love forever if it's Nick it's not there what what am I gonna say I love you and I don't like you anymore right that's the big finish the mission that Mishnah calls is the quintessential rubbish Amos leave another thing this the mission is being massaged obviously include with number you should know it's still something that might require creases for his to make an Amish even 20 right right yeah he's gonna say bhai no nickname choice in Ben am Kesha a mitzvah cousin this is not a simple process this itself is a very deep mental and emotional process absolutely make a Chris as written in 10 years something happens we all know how these things are think about some of your best friends at a certain point in life and today maybe if you call them before it's your son to wish the Maximus in at over it should not a good design and it's sometimes sad when you see these things happen you were tight you were very close and how does it happen you know sometimes takes 30 years to build a friendship and around five seconds to destroy it that happens one telephone call one text one email boob kaput what do you do behind you and they schiessen man am cashier I'm into the closet they create between themselves a very strong and powerful bond so you see aa dubious cashier above or something they're going to connect with their loved the Keshan nefler alumni laminate ambadas their love they decide together is going to connect them the casshern if la pasión if allah means a wonderous kesha a unique passion if Allah means Apella beyond the ordinary Lamine laminate on without to the point that it's going to reach a space that is beyond tom reason and rationality so i've south PR tom vada saw its earnest lifts a convo so that one day down the line even though rationally there's so many good reasons to stop the love only Graham is a cinema or even deeper not just reasons to stop the love reasons to start hating which happens after all this thirty years I was here for you thirty years I was if somebody called me last night about some big McCoy curse in his community so some guy who hates him cut him off completely so I asked him why does he hate you so much why does he hate you so much he says cuz for the past 40 years I was the one who I said I help them I help them hundreds of times get on his feet that's the only reason I could find so sometimes you have a situation where you stop loving and then sometimes you look at a person and you say after all this after all this this is how you betray me sometimes I stop loving there's a reason Lee Grimm sinner to create hate I felt became a Maasai chris is bliss because they made this covenant more clear savasana akiyama's there's even a deeper voice in them that transcends the rationality and it compels them to maintain the love while cold show em to fascism and this love covers up all mistakes all sins now that there's no mistakes but somehow it covers it up the cash shirt I'm Michele this love and this Ke$ha covers up all sins why the fish of all but bliss pistachios kilo not soda Buster effort what the grease does is it's as though they became one flesh one person or commercial or you holistic avisail that's mine just like you can't stop loving yourself a healthy person does not stop loving themselves cash flow you've sick Mahavira their love will not stop from your friend you also make mistakes yourself you don't say to yourself you know yesterday I made such a big mistake that's it I'm done with me I'm not talking to me again some people do that some people do then and the ramifications are not so - man but a healthy person you don't say you know what I'm such a lowlife I'm not having a relationship with myself anymore that's it I'm calling myself off for my life some people do a powder they've become like dead zombies their own relationship with themselves but a healthy person a functional human being you don't stop loving yourself now you made a lot of mistakes okay I'll cope sign the house I have a self love covers over we all know we know the mistakes we make better than are with anybody else you can even say that you know the mistakes you make even better than your wife I'm not sure about that because she knows them before you make them but how dare I share me a day off see this she smells that you're gonna make that but generally we know ourselves as they say in recovery we know us have an expression we know us nobody knows your mistakes and your bobbum Isis and your issues and your skeletons and ghosts and demons and our Vedas like you yourself people may know a little bit your therapist may know a little more your sponsor may know a little more but you know everything with all the darkness and yet nobody loves you as much as you love yourself how does that work look either you should be your greatest enemy because you know better than anybody else doesn't work that way you know why because the love to the self when you're a healthy person is not rational and it shouldn't be rational you don't love yourself rationally you don't say you know what today I'm a good guy therefore I like myself you know why cuz then when one day you're not such a good guy you hate yourself people attack you live like that it's a very very painful life because your self-love fluctuates right somebody gives you a compliment in the morning today I'm a good guy I love myself then somebody criticizes you oh I'm a bad guy I hate myself then you wait for the next compliment to be able to love yourself that's not how it works self-love is non-negotiable you embrace yourself not for rational reasons not because I'm handsome not because I'm brilliant not because I'm a saint not because I don't make mistakes you need to accept yourself and have compassion for all parts of yourself and actually that's how you could fix your mistakes if you don't accept yourself if you don't love yourself you can't fix your mistakes because you look at yourself as either lost or hopeless or with such disdain a person needs to be able to accept themselves and it's not rational doesn't have to be rational you don't need to give a sheer up he say why you love yourself if you do that's a big problem you see what he's saying this is the type of friendship you decide now you want to have this with another person we're gonna make mistakes but could our friendship transcend the mistakes depends if the friendship is based in a rational place then in 10 years from now I may do something you may do something and we say you know what it's not happening we may even hate each other and because you're so close the hate is much deeper there's no hate like the hate to a best friend just like there's no hate like the hate and family there's no much locust like much Lakers and family right there's the most horrible my Lakers why because they love each other so they kill each other that's what the Jewish people are like people don't undo so family we love each other and we fight with each other just like families just like family I mean if you read the news from Israel you see the whole Israel is basically one rich a few names but it's one responsible all Israeli politics it's not a country it's a responsible some and bias issues in Israel it's not you can't understand Israeli news by comparing it to a country yeah not a country it's I misspoke basically you shall I'm is one which spoke of may truckers another let's boxer it's seven eight families that are fighting with each other the whole area strollers that work but that's really how Jews work so whenever you're very close to somebody you could get far from somebody there's no relationship as loving and as tense as the relationship with your mom with your mother why cuz the mama is in the kiss kiss you can't estranged yourself from your mother your mother carried you she she nursed you she brought you into the world it's very very deep because it's so deep when it's problematic it's very problematic so when the best friend hurts you there's no hurt like that a stranger hurts you're fine next we say Co Chavez good morning so if it operates on that level that comes a point where the other stops why either the original factor is gone or another factor intervened and destroyed it or somebody else inter which always happens somebody else from outside enlightens you to the truth of this person the Christmas bris eliminates all that not by making you naive not making you naive by asking yourself a question can our love reach the same level like self-love where it transcends rationality tomba das it's a commitment of course it always takes both sides it always takes both sides and it takes both sides to always be conscious of the bris to always be conscious of the bris and to live that way if one of them decides it's like a contract so to speak if one side decides I'm reaching the contract it's over there's no contract anymore it really includes it if that's what we have till there's a commercial means commercial like yourself to understand what Valentine is saying you have to understand your self love yourself doesn't mean spoil yourself or become arrogant that's not self-love that self hate arrogance is a form of self hate because you have to be arrogant because you don't accept yourself insecurity its insecurity yeah I thought tough as much I'm a man a lot all arrogance comes from self hate it looks like self love it's not real self love you can accept your vulnerabilities and therefore you can have compassion for all parts of yourself this doesn't mean you justify your mistakes on the contrary you don't justify your mistakes you can be open about your mistakes and fix them self love is not about being blind or bribing yourself with tips Asst that you're perfect or saintly it's the other way around self love doesn't mean you love your errors you love your sins self love doesn't mean you're always covering up you're always defensive that's not self love that self hate defensiveness is not self love defensive miss and I always have to protect myself because I don't like myself I don't like what I'm gonna see self love means I can really accept the truth of my cell value which is essentially divine and therefore I can really accept and have compassion for all the parts of myself including the facts that there's a lot of imperfection then how do you do that have enough tally locked was a lot of stuff you tell them how to do it maybe somebody over here and as this notion could explain it you built it ya know you have to wear you have a facility you have to first find out why you hate yourself you have to first figure out why do you why do you want to make your relationships is by its nature don't see your friendship is based on things that you have together hmm why do you want to be strong those things are good question that's the vorc because you feel there's an essential connection you know that it deserves this relationship the kisses bris is not because you're stupid yes the question if this person is gonna take advantage of you and abuse you you're an idiot you make a Chris's bris to abuse me abuse me abused me abused me and I become a battered woman or a battered man and I love you that's how we're talking about dove is understood again if this one side breaches the Chris's risk there's no Chris's wrist anymore it's a dual commitment it's two people who are committed to this state of consciousness because there's a lot of factors in the world that destroy relationships and you have to have a commitment to the value of this relationship that will transcend all of these obstacles exactly they know that essentially their relationship warrants this it's not based on immaturity and faith darts yes it's not based on the maturity it's based on the fact that we belong to each other we're committed to each other maybe we can give the example of a marriage every marriage not every but many marriages go through crisis ups and downs many marriages people consider divorce maybe not verbally but in their minds yeah I told you a youth ones came to our of and said it every like it will I get it officers had very honest welcome to the United States of America he wants a gat shine good morning you know you and Columbus discovered the United States yeah okay so there are a few people this villain ish and they didn't laugh by the joke which and we're very proud of may continue based on the Tanakh secure but those who unfortunately did laugh because they got the humor and their romance is not mamas ad infinitum yeah marriages go through challenges and I'm talking about regular matter not all my dysfunctional horrible situations I'm at regular marriages of civilized people who are basically normal mentally normal hopefully and etc you have this concept you have to tell a lot of reasons that could come in and say okay this is it but these are there's a deeper dimension that you know or you may not even know but you may sense there may be an intuition there may be if this is this belongs to me I belong to this huh every relationship a relationship has to start with external factors you have to get to know the person if to appreciate the person if not you could marry a wall and you can marry a car so people do that you can marry a smartphone many people do that if the min ago moco yeah this is a mine this is emotions of course it's emotional like everything happens so so you you appreciate that this is where the relationship could go because it's dear it's supposed to be there but you know there's so many factors in the world internally and externally psychologically we also live in places of insecurity we live in places of fear we live in places of shame we live in places of guilt we live in very painful places especially coupled with experiences of the past and this destroys all relationships you can be present in a relationship if you live with self shame you know why because there's no self to be present if I hate myself and I don't accept myself I could never be present in a relationship it just doesn't work you can use a relationship as a cover-up but that's not a relationship you understand what I'm saying many people do that they enter into relationships to compensate for the lack of relationship with themselves then we do it all the time but that's not a relationship because I'm actually not there I'm trying to run away and bury myself by making believe I'm alive through the relationship with you but there's no I here there's just you there's no me and then it creates our gods Tomoe anybody knows what I'm talking about anybody does it right but if we appreciate all of this this is part of what we have to appreciate this also we know all this comes into play the Chris's bris is a commitment to that type of relationship which will bring forth from you your truest values and crisis that's what it does the Chris's bris is not here to destroy you and make you into a a victim of abuse if you're doing this to be used it's not a Chris's grist that it's the worst relationship wrong to China run for the hills if the kisses Chris has any component of manipulation it's over it's not a kisses bristles of them another form of abuse it's coming from the utmost sense of self to scully and self-actualization ooh what's first commitment of love if I'm speaking in Soho or Tribeca or Greenwich Village I say commitment from speaking in Lakewood Muncie Williamsburg bar apart I say love you understand what no you have to listen demo in a world where there's no commitment anymore will you change your spouse as often as you change your suits the value of commitment has to be introduced and the power of commitment which is what sustains families for thousands of years but in places where people tell young boys or girls you don't have to feel anything just get married and in 90 years you'll start feeling after you'll have 99 aim the class you'll start having emotions it's not about love you don't even have to feel but it's all gonna work out your mother got married your Bubba got married they were miserable you'll be miserable the main thing is you do it for the kids and then the kids do it for their kids and then the kids do it for their kids and I always ask which is the generation that ultimately gets all the benefits everybody's doing it like one guy said my mother we never we always we in the my house we always ate leftovers always we're still looking for the original meal so everybody's doing it for the kids for the kids so who's gonna be the benefactor of of the ultimate generation tako aliawan AVI so in a situation where commitment is unbelievably emphasized which is great and love is completely ignored sometimes to the peril and the detriment of the couples because they don't learn to enjoy each other to appreciate sir to respect each other you have to speak about that that's my answer to you question okay so this summation of what we learned yesterday was Moshe Rabbeinu speaks about love Rahab maurice hashem elokenu what is the concept of a bris Acrisius bris the concept of a christmas bris he explains at first glance seems a little strange if you love each other you love each other and if not not what does a covenant help an explanation that was given the palate Anya gave was in the beginning of chapter 2 of this mind Martha minutes of it is you don't start off with a Chris's bris you don't start off with a covenant every relationship begins with appreciating the other person based on various factors whatever those factors may be intellectual usually emotional combination of both the superficial stuff or hopefully deeper stuff but the relationship begins and the relationship develops and the two people who are in a relationship they value the relationship and they also understand that as life goes on things can happen that will undermine it and could completely decimate a destroy it or at least weaken it significantly as he said either me bias internally or externally that could be a mini amoeba hotz from outside or from inside it can also be that many factors that contributed to the love can cease and as the Mishna says bottled over what love a virtue you govern if the average remains dependent on those factors if those factors are gone the love is gone and therefore as the Ovid develops and these two people who are very close understand and appreciate that life is tough and even if the factors don't change there can be other factors that will intervene and meddle in people or factors that will compromise the love or dilute it or destroy it so now they're ready to make a Chris's bris and what does the Chris's restate the Chris's bris say that they're both making a commitment to this relationship but a commitment as he puts it it's going to be a cashier I'm its viscosity shaft to be discussion about what's on vacation if la la' mile-a-minute ambadas to a point that it transcends rationality what does it mean it transcends rationality rationally they'll be excuses to stop the relationship they may even be reasons to have negative feelings that can not only that there's no positive they can even be reasons for us to start despising each other hating each other but the Chris's bris brings out a deeper dimension within them it is consistent with their value their ultimate value is that this relationship should be intact and therefore they're treating the other person like they would treat themselves the posix says I'll call trying to Kesava yourself love covers over your own mistakes in your own sins you don't need a reason to love yourself you love to self is not based on rationality and calculations hopefully and therefore changes from day to day from week to week from year to year today I love myself tomorrow I hate myself just like self-love does not get interrupted by a healthy normal human being the love to the other is the same level of love that's what the Chris's bris that's what the Chris's bris accomplishes and achieves and it works between both both of the people and he continues and he says we'll hang Nick Rebelution Chris's bris that's why it's called Chris's bris what does criticism is literally Chris's means cutting carrots Lestrade and bris means a covenant a bond a bond what what's the connection commercial Casso this is a plastic anemia yermian Nova describes this concept in Pedro de la Madonna the Jeremiah 30 for commercial coastal are Shakur suicide a go by our Ruben sorrow they had a calf slaughter they cut the calf and they passed through the two pieces they split it into two they cut that leaf into two parts two sections and they walk between the two you have it already in Barcia / la huh when our makes the Covenant with Rama V know what happens says he sees the fire walking through the pasaron walking through the pieces of meat what's this concept what is this that's what Chris's bris means the answer is calamar Leah's Nahum over in the title goof as ugly as lack of them there's a symbolic element here the calf is one a piece of meat that comes from one animal is one it's one animal when you've cut it into two and you walk between it it's basically saying we're not two people we're one person who are split into two people and therefore our relationship to each other is gonna be like our relationship to ourselves Leo / Aden we're two people but we're becoming one that's what the Chris's bris means the Brisbane upstarting means and therefore my relationship with you is gonna be like my relationship with myself just like my religion with myself I may make mistakes I may make big mistakes but I'm not gonna cut off my relationship with myself I'm not gonna tell myself I'm not talking to myself anymore as we said most people should not be doing that you shouldn't be stop talking to yourself and stop having a relationship with yourself even though you make mistakes there's a certain element of self-acceptance I'll call Shyam - Kesava that's going to be my relationship with you knowing then that whatever happens any wind that comes and goes any wind that blows our way wherever that wherever the situations and circumstances may emerge externally or internally and we'll have every excuse in the world to say Casal see the pesach it was nice knowing you now have a wonderful day it's time to sever the cords of this relationship and who like us know how many factors life brings out that can cause all of these type of separations we both fall back on that Chris's bris it's of course the act of cutting meat then walking through is not going to save a marriage or save a relationship it's with this act is representing in their souls that the commitment to the relationship the value of this relationship is more powerful than anything else and therefore just like with yourself you maintain it you maintain it with the other person despite circumstances that may want to interrupt no yeah he's just using it as a Martian 100 percent this is just a muscle to explain what the concept of a bris is yeah Leah's Nahum even botanical Farid Leah slaughtered them so they become one but now that they become one that I am you and you am I that's not a Chris's bris then it's one person there are two people but it's two people that are so to speak separated it's one separated into two and therefore we maintain that connection as I maintain it with myself just like I can't stop loving myself even if I try very hard I will not stop loving you Vahine a leash name everybody he may call her Marshall has a just entire pad metaphor that we have been addressing us alone aa Shambala que no Nicole emotionless us alone or Shambhala cane this entire Marshall Hashem did to us and for us to see if the pus excessive patches kiss ISA we read it in the createrra violent a nascent and fast days he may are noisy coitus bris negative AMSA as sandy flows the two parts of the parsec are not disconnect I am creating a covenant with you I'm cutting a bris with you before your entire nation going to do new flow you see Titans Peters nafloyd is Islam alumina Tomba das the word Matthias which comes from the word Kella a wonder wonderous unique something special means when you say it sniffler an aerosol Allah nomads lick and we say this choice business and business florists again the same idea what sniff Luis de Flores is playin one there is things that are beyond time that das beyond rationality a Chris's bris means that we're creating a bond that is going to reach into a place within ourselves that is beyond calculated reasons because if it remains just about calculated reasons it's not in the deepest place if it's not in the deepest place it can also be dissolved because there'll be reasons as early it'll be reasons as if it could reach into a place of Matthias then the after the relationship will be forever and that's why you can measure might of Italy are innocent as doves said about your heinous and it doesn't mean he said it too young innocent innocent already has been killed he said about the itis in Malaysia our vasca Lee may Ava's notion this is the first as I mentioned the first chapter of Shmuel base at the end of small Aleph so lamella and his son unison died in the war against the flesh Tim dove with amela who suffered a lot because of soul here is about the death of soul who's the Jewish king and his son his best friend Jonason loved' and unison have made a Chris's bris they've made a covenant and here who know who like them knew that there will be so many factors to undermine the relationship missons own father was upset that young innocent was close to the oven there was every reason in the world and the greatest reason was you know unison was supposed to be the natural successor and done with that malice was appointed as king if there was ever a competitor in history dove it is your archenemy he's the first man you should kill or at least the neutralizer eliminate seven tags on you're the son of the king and he was now anointed as a king not only did that not happen young mrs. relationship with dove it remained unique something special this is where the Chris's bris came when you saw line join us and die and governor Mela hears the news so the opening of small bays peyrac I love the first chapter of small base there's the eulogy that of anomalous gives for Solon join us and if you ever want to know how to eulogize a person simply choose the words and express your emotions this is the eulogy to read small base pea Calif it's an extraordinary extraordinary chapter and Tanakh word of it speaks about shawl and he speaks about unison the famous expression he says shawl and unison and now have him vaneman but I am over my someone defraud him in the Charlene Cao Lu who may I Ria's Guevara which was taken and recorded into the other a command scheisse miriam that is said on Shabbos before most of about all of the Jews who were killed throughout the generations an oven by named Abraham and that comes from Buffett's husband they were beloved in their life and in their death they were not separated mm outlook says Dan this is the pasta that the ballot Anya is quoting he says I'll quote the whole posse sali elaha off he unison I am full of distress over you my brother you're innocent now I'm tolima you have caused me such sweetness in my life you have caused me such pleasantness in my life and if Flay Sarvis Kalima Ava's not sure the love that you had to me wasn't if leisa there was something extraordinary something out of this worth more than Ava's not sure which Ava's nor him the love of a man to woman in our world content could can contain tremendous potency and tremendous incredible electrifying power but over time a letter says and if lacy wants to bring you out the tremendous Alba that they had to each other in the place I was holding a verse Marshall the word he chooses his new place on the ballot Anya puts that together with he made me cry this bridge snagit column class Matthias that the Chris's bris was one lamella Mutombo das it reached into a place of the soul that is beyond rationality just I don't love myself for rational reasons you don't start looking for reasons why you're allowed to love yourself and when people do that's the beginning of a tragedy right somebody once told me says give me three reasons I should love myself there's nothing to answer if that's the question there's no answer cuz even if I give you nine thousand reasons to love yourself you don't love yourself you're looking for a justification you're looking for a reason it's a different type of love that's not self-love it's a very very tarnished it's a very compromised it's a very what's the word the very just it's a pet it's a pet it's a pain it's it's a painful question of the person is looking for that justification why you are beyond reason and the you loves the udu is one I am one with me so dove it and yo unison reached this level of a relationship which is unique that two people should be able to experience that it's not simple because naturally I'm selfish I love myself but with you with something else but that's the fitness share they had a Chris's bris Klu day you'd give them be this irrational shim system I should have been all of a sudden through the 13 attributes of compassion that money should have been you jus 4th impact Lisa after the hata a go Nausicaa vehicle chris's blissmiss gaseous like others buttercream is strong these are Chris's bliss between a sham and the Jewish people or earlier Sava to arouse the love and that's why he continues with salata Levine a know how to say no shallow you you have when they say some of Dylan that the sins should not separate as the PASOK says of when they say from of Dylan been a thermo bein a similar case and that's what you Shia Navi says but the Chris's bris makes that our voyage shouldn't be Marvel ki hail Akash I'm Emily because as the post success and purchase Ozzie no sale Akasha mama and why does he bring this posture care cuz that's the whole idea of a Chris's R is that it's really one we are really one even though we're separated into two so they forget hey Latasha mama there's an inseparable connection when does this happen only after they create the golden calf after the marriage is betrayed before the marriage is betrayed you don't need a Chris miss you love your spouse because you have a great relationship you're having a great time with each other you respect her she respects you it's a messiah on our me moon but 40 days after the wedding suddenly this whole marriage goes into the jude goes down the drain this whole marriage is not happening they don't even wait a long time the Jews were impatient it didn't have time imagine the middle of the seven brothers a few weeks after the shower brushes you're on your honeymoon boom he's already somewhere else sees somewhere else that there's no hope for such a relationship so moisture table Aidan was told by a sham this is not happening this relationship is not happening motion knew that at this point the relationship has to graduate to a new level what's gonna be the new level he may on I see craters bliss negatron Casa de Flores the siwash the love an anal have to say no inculta know that the relationship is not anymore based on if you behave this way okay and if you do babe don't behave this way therefore our relationship gets interrupted rather it brought up motion of being a broad out caballo call from Hashem and from the Jewish people the essential connection of hey loca Shem am i that it's inseparable but a tiny once said in Yiddish I Eve nish de Ville Oh nishta can design appreciate vanilla kosis a Jew truthfully not he wants to nor can he or she be separated from godliness in other words even if I'm a conscious level or on a rational level there are sins these mistakes there's an interruption and therefore naturally you should say there's no connection anymore there's a reason to say this marriage is over and there's good reasons whether people mix then from outside or within or the reasons that were there why I chose you I'm not here anymore in fact you betrayed me if this relationship is based on a Chris's bris a relationship of connection that is essential that is innate Allah my limit down without you can go back to that and the relationship remains intact it doesn't mean you don't have to ask forgiveness it doesn't mean you don't have to reappear mistakes it does on the contrary of course mistakes have to be repaired but it means that the two don't get separated as that's the Chris's bris that emerges after the cat the agel and it's always a Pella for the tomato Mutombo dance is not week well today we'll have the renewal of nails these renewal of vows is just restoring the right to its upgrade event right before him that was not a La Mina right right right so essentially what parishes kiss ISA is this is articulating this that the relationship was on two phases Hashem tells me should have a new honey Kali leave me alone and allow me to destroy the Jewish people so rashly says from the Gemara Haneke Ali Hashem was telling him if you don't leave me alone I won't be able to destroy them he was basically giving why should I be Noah hint that there's two phases of this relation one phase of the relationship is we have a contract you betrayed the contract it's over I hire an employee from 9:00 to 5:00 I give him a contract you have to come in at nine o'clock you have to do work he doesn't show up one day doesn't show up another day finally shows up the third day and he makes a Corbin in the office after a week or two weeks even from a very nice guy I'm gonna say you know what this is really not working out because the relationship is based on the contract I'm an employee you're an employee what makes us close that you work for me and you do the job if you're not doing the job what's the connection that's one type of a relationship the reminder shillelagh makes a concert with the Jewish people you're my people I'm your God I'm committed to you you had to be committed to me and I'm committed to me a fine what's the point at this point my should have a new nose he got the cue he got the cue to bring out a new level of the relationship and the new level of the relationship is key hail Akasha mama they say the courser mama means that they're really one it's not a contract love relationship it's not you're connected to me because you work for me and you do the job you're not working for me there's no connection the definition of our relationship is you follow the rules if you don't follow the rules what's our relationship but what about if your child is working for you oh and then you have headaches how do you get rid of your trifling he breaks any contract in the world so nurse does I push it right so mate I cannot work in the business but you don't horse a child and what happens if you're not working out with yourself you're gonna get divorce from yourself so merger should have been who revealed that dimension of the relationship that ultimately it's an inseparable bond because it's not a bond that is created through the rational reasons that you're doing the right thing the bond is an essential bond it's two souls that I really want and that's what the bris represents that's what the adieu me this harassment brought out the administer acumen brought out that dimension of the relationship here we learned in the moment of passion after a moyes if you remember key by him as a it happened that's why I Shem Tov's Madhavi no remember there's some teeth carbon across at sir he may mock him it even it's after but sir while high above work avoided with some tissue by niklas up so it's a very strange passion so he says what's at Sur at sir is a Flintstone generally you have fire if you pour the water on the fire trying to extinguish it even if you have a cold and the fire is hidden in the calls so you don't see the fire it's concealed but if you blow on the call the fire comes out but if you pour enough water on the call it's going to ultimately be extinguished what about the fire the sparks in a Flintstone the Flintstone could be in water for thousands of years it could be in that plant that ocean or in a lake or a brook and you take out the Flintstone and you can always recreate the fire so he says been it's after let's serve there's some tisha by Nicholas absurd at this moment well should I may have brought out the relationship images of this under sir level which fat water cannot which water cannot destroy that's also consistent with this idea here in itself kimmel to the he may on resolved what does this have to with the press you mean a bris Milla it's really a similar concept that was the bris between a shaman of Ramallah no yeah yeah move wait a minute the Morrises issue commander may Hill Adhamiya he should come and Emile Adhamiya Vahini Amira's al spade a given cause I'll say in the secretary Shoshana the mayor tells us the Shoshana Duff design rachanna dalam adalat America is Buraku umbrella for named alpha Chatham lacunae alaikum Hashem says to the Jewish people say before me mouthiest mouthiest means verses that represent my mouth was my kingship in order that you should make me a king over you Zacharias say o sub sukham of memory she a lose the throne from the funny Latoya so you memory should ascend before me for positiveness for par for goodness oh by man how do you do this by chauffeur through the show and this is how the Gemara describes very briefly the structure of the governing of Missouri Shoshanna where we have three sections and Muslim this sukham of mouth ears of our shams kingship circum of the dryness of our sham remembering and is sukham about Cyprus and between each one we blow chauffeur by the mouse key sections writers section so free section and that's the structure of muscle journal which is unique from the whole year usually Shabbos everyday she when Esther is 19 blessings Shabbos injunctive when Esther is seven blessings three and three and one in the middle Mikado Shabbos massager to solve its monitor which is suddenly you have nine blessings because the middle one you have number seven number eight number nine you have an extra three broke of Malchus raka varieties and rock options he made roshanda who's a lien Phyllis massacres economy ammunition diverted by other militia petitioner Rama Rajyam mother scale of concerning you should show me the Gomorrah says in the second strand of cosine and with it goes into the Muslim regions Rama Zarin Phyllis massacres are currently English this day is the beginning of your creation a memory for the first day meaning because Adam was created under Shoshanna the FIR human being and what did he say on the first version Shauna so it's brought in Madras in Isaiah that Adam said the Misner of tehilim which we say this sure shall um every single Friday we say this in the shushil young because this is the song of Friday because the first Friday it was said Hashem mullah Gaius lavash Hashem reigned he he adorns exaltedness he puts on the lavash of Gaius Gaius means exaltedness aloofness sublimity malcolm's gales because the fish asanas galimov who she is but on the first Rosh Hashanah his mouth was emerged what does it mean it merged there were many creatures before Thresher shana before friday but none of them could say a sham all those case lovers because all of them are programmed they just follow their genetic makeup whether it's an insect or a mammal or a fish or a bird or a galaxy whatever type of creation it is it just follows the program with which it was encoded so to speak by mice operations the first self conscious and self-aware existence well I shouldn't say the first self kind of animals also have some level of self consciousness but the first creation Adam and Chava who have choices and therefore could bring out and explain a sham Mullica is what which this is written well how is there be services available that but then it was all an arousal from above meaning Hashem initiated the process he created other the average of sonically is he currently English this explains the paradox in the sentence ji-yong keyless moussaka Z currently ammunition what do you mean you just said this is Chile's masa if it still as moussaka so this is youngish besides your son is not game initiation is day six other wasn't created day one is created a six about an is explaining Zahra in Chile's masa today Russian is the beginning of your mice of the creation of Adam but it's not like it was then then it was this elusive delaila on arousal from above he says now the absolutely is accordingly English now we have to create a Sakura a commemoration of young Venetian I they say Russa de la santé well it is godless man who say is Boris Elena is occurring a police force consciously been a shinobi name initially it was Chile's moussaka today it's not exactly the same today it depends on the Seleucid Allah Sato on an arousal from below meaning on the inspiration that comes from humanity from the Jewish people it's a Z currently I'm mission but it's not exactly the way it was in your mission because then it was initiated from heaven and now it's initiated from Earth Lorien to arouse the revelation of his mouth loss then he created other but now it's a serviceable asana the Bema Odin is galas malluci Elaine identical in appearance by his conscience have been a sham of a naina by remembering the bris the Covenant and the connection between our shaman knows how does this happen behind why they are chauffeured the way this is expressed under shoshanna's to the chauffeur show penis chew Vila the chauffeur represents a higher level of Chava in contrast to chuhwa Tatar which is a lower level of children meaning pre Moustakas a coil may incur deliver mini CUDA spinning missile a-akane clay a typical Montebello ribbon a sheikh al velvet for la Hainan ome rains vardaman optimist Kyoko portions what does the Schaefer represent there's a Sokka Sokka there's an outcry of a sound but it comes me oome could deliver from the depth of the heart from what's called Miku display Marissa life the core of the heart why do we say it comes from the core of the heart because the clay had deboard can't eliminate the instruments of speech cannot limit this outcry because it's only a sound it's a coil and that's why a nightmare Van Horne we stay in Tooele a night my veins Vardhan baleen ish McCallum see paraphrases that there's no words there's no verbiage what is there there's only a Kia skull passion the fact is that when a person there are two types there are two types of cries well actually we could say there's two types of one is a cry that has words to it a person cries a person laments a person expresses himself you would think that is a very profound cry but the truth is that's a limited form clay habibur-rahman belief it could limit itself to words to verbiage but sometimes is a much deeper cry that can't be limited in words it's the cry of silence the cry of silence in many ways is far deeper than the cry of words because it's so deep I can't even express it I don't even know how to express it odd kid a cop just like we understand when when the ISIF is the emperor the prime minister of Egypt and he arrests his brothers because he accuses them of espionage in Egypt Reuven turns to his brothers and he says Avila Shaima Menachem oh we are guilty why are we guilty because God is demanding the blood of our brother Yosef of course as he puts it there he says be his shaman no Yael a new he begged us to save him Volusia mana we did not listen we threw him into a pit and we sold him into slavery the first time we discovered that Yosef was pleading for mercy in the story of vacation when they throw him into the pit yes it doesn't say a word suddenly purchase me kate's years years years later 20 is more than 20 years later 21 years later we discoverable Yosef was screaming he was begging he was pleading for mercy grab on grab on grab on addresses this we never heard about it Yosef was quite a didn't say a word something Reuben says be Santa Elena Velez shimano and one of the interpretations is Felicia mano you could save a leash a mano we didn't listen to him or volition mando is even worse we didn't hear there are two types of screaming somebody who screamed their mouths and there's somebody who screams with their eyes this common male knew it was such a deep sense of anguish he didn't scream but la semana were guilty for not even knowing that he was screaming that's another guilt not only did we ignore his scream that step to step one is we didn't even notice Kaname Elena I didn't even see it and you read sometimes story of our child that takes their life a teenager a young man a young boy a young girl they never said anything that's part of the corned beefs tanana Elena valachia mono I didn't even hear I didn't even know but why didn't I ask myself a question this girl was so social she was so with it what happened suddenly in one day she withdrew she's not talking to anybody shouldn't people ask questions this child was integrated and suddenly this child fell into a deep depression maybe somebody should have sat with his child and asked what is going on or at least try to search try to appreciate that his child is not just a troublemaker that there's something profoundly profoundly going on biscotti may Elena Velez shimano there are cries that people scream and then there are cries that come from the Kudus Nimmi is a lathe there's no clay Adeeb or not because it's not there it's too profound for words to contain I have no words and sometimes I don't even have a coil all I have is silence so the chauffeur he says is the Kudus Fleming is a lathe there's no ointment there's no divide and what is it a cult portion it's a simple client it pays tribute to the cries in people's hearts that goes beyond words there are things you speak about there are things you can't talk about that's what the chauffeur is trying to address things you talk about there's no hood we could deal with them but things you don't talk about because it comes from the Columbia Sun lathe that's what the chauffeur is trying to the capture with chiavari little gunk in a nail the cut shavar him it's not like suddenly and shavar him there are words it's not canonical partial but it's also occur LS she a super Karl asked Mycah McGinnis the coil itself has different dimensions what's new is good new Hagen eeeh coolly the Gemara says in recession that the difference of Sivaraman true is smarter miss ghanoush a garnet and true is you lula yellow meaning varam is like a Sai ghanoush a means a sire crafts yeah that's a smart him and then true is like a sob so what's the doing of takea Shradha manure it's all a coil one is a cull push it straight sound - that's takea one is a schwa room which is ghanoush a gun at Versailles and one is truer which is a Yolo but all of them have a common denominator and that is there are no words and as these will say later suddenly there's no words even the cry not your own cry you using the ram's horn to cry in other words you're not even expressing your own sound because that's even a deeper sound there's the sound you express and then there's the sound you can't even express with your own mouth you use the color of the Behaim of the animal of the most primal primal sound of the person he doesn't even have his own sound not only there's no speech there's no verbiage there's not even his own coil is on coil is silent you need the animal to bring out the color here itself you have the deer you have the Shoreham you have the true the key is complete simplicity just a sound it doesn't even have character to it the chiavari em already has character with his acai and the true has a different type of character which is a sob but the common denominator and all of them is that it's a coil it's beyond a bore this is that cycle the outcry that goes into the deep place of the soul which ultimately pays tribute to the chris's bliss to the Covenant that is created between a shaman the Jew that is beyond rationality that is beyond externalities that is beyond seho and time with us it's this conscious that is may only could deliver in the deepest place of the heart it can be articulated in words because it can be articulated in words that's why it's expressed in the chauffeur as you will go on to explain now you say the first fish Hashanah process was initiated by Hashem he serviceable Allah created the world no nobody means that the whole creation happened oh my son's choice and now depends on the person's are void right now but when a visitor Shoshanna with a person needs to be mom discussion to bring out a new year of creation started the whole process the whole Rhea summer was something more - the whole area including the whole the oiler and the other was always over my mind and now this 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